apocalypsos: (Default)
Hi, gang ... not sure how many people are still hanging around here but I'm kind of desperate so I figure it can't hurt.

Last Monday, I lost a temp job that was supposed to last another two months. It paid pretty well, but I was only just catching up with my bills when I had to spend about $700 on repairs on my car in the last couple of weeks. Which would have been fine, if the job hadn't suddenly ended out of nowhere.

I don't start my unemployment payments for another two weeks and I'm already behind on rent and my electric bill. I literally have nothing left in my bank account until then. I was going to try and save up or raise some money to take a few months after my temp job ended to try and make writing and podcasting my main job, but this sort of came out of nowhere, and the car stuff didn't help.

Anyway, if you can and would like to help in the short term, my PayPal is here. If you can, thank you SO MUCH.
apocalypsos: (Default)
Hi, gang! Just a head's up that I started a Kickstarter for the podcast! I'm hoping to get some new equipment and pay website fees and stuff with it, so please think about tossing a few bucks into the pot. And if you contribute $25 or more I will do an episode on the disaster of your choice! :)

P.S. I'm not getting anything for Christmas so this is the closest thing I may get to a present. If that helps. ;)

Hi, gang!

Oct. 31st, 2016 07:18 pm
apocalypsos: (Default)
I just realized I posted to LJ and not here about a few recent things, SO.

-- I quit my job! I didn't have any savings or a new job lined up, but dog camp had become such a detriment to my mental health I couldn't deal anymore and up and walked out on the 8th. I'm starting a new job this week just as soon as my background check pans out, but if anyone wants to help out and toss a few bucks my way to help with rent and bills and whatnot, here's a GoFundMe I set up. And thanks, if you can help. :)

-- I finished another manuscript! It's "The Incubators," a historical YA about the Triangle Shirtwaist factory fire. I have an Etsy shop set up where you can get the PDF and I'm selling it on Amazon. If you can, or want to get my other books to help out, please do it through Etsy -- they pay quicker and I could use the money, obvs.

-- My podcast is going swimmingly! If you missed me talking about it before, it's called Disaster Area and it's basically me talking about a disaster every episode. It's on iTunes and other podcast sites, and it's downloadable on SoundCloud.

Aaaaand now I'm going to go do more research for the next episode. :)
apocalypsos: (i'm an amused children's bullfighter)
I made a podcast!

It's called "Disaster Area" and it's about disasters (surprise!), with an occasional episode on disaster movies. The link is to the blogs, where you can find notes on disasters, ways to support the podcast, and links to the episodes on Soundcloud. If you want, you can also subscribe on iTunes. :)
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
And for free until Wednesday!

Please feel free to spread the word. I'm hoping to get it onto the top 100 free ebooks on Amazon by the time this promotion ends. :)

(Just a head's up - this is a new edit with some changes suggested by my agent.)
apocalypsos: (Default)
-- I just finished my very last college class yesterday. So I've basically graduated ... I just need to get the paper degree. But yaaaaaaay. :D

-- Here is my Patreon for the two projects I'm working on this summer before I move on to the Heroine Addiction sequel. Oh, man, free time again. *flappyhands*

-- Here is the link to "The Monsters of Moosic", which is free today on Amazon.

-- Aaaaaaand here is the link to that gay shapeshifter-type erotica I've been sitting on for a while. Yeah, it's a pen name, but that's just to keep the fun stuff separate from the serious stuff.
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
Hi, gang, I just figured I'd pop my head in and link to my Patreon. Right now, I'm working part-time at a dog camp (puppies!) and I'm hoping to stay that way a little while after I graduate in ... jeez, three weeks because I have two major projects I desperately want to finish ASAP. Details are listed on the Patreon, if you're interested. :)

If anyone wants to help, I'd be really grateful. I've only got two more papers to finish for school and then I'm basically done. Like, completely. Thursday's my last day of classes. Yaaaaaaaay.
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
I know it's been a while and all, but I figured that I'd give a holler and mention that I posted The Monsters of Moosic to Amazon last night. Go buy a copy for a poor starving artist who's got college loan payments coming up in six months. :)
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
Okay, so I thought I'd give you guys a quick update about what's going on with me just in case you're not following me on Tumblr, in which case you've missed a bunch since the last time I posted before my Dear Yuletide Santa letter. The highlights:

-- I got a new agent-shaped person! His name is Mike and he's with the literary agency I interned for last summer. Apparently, that internship came in handy in more ways than one.

Also, because he had me do some editing and whatnot so he can try to sell it, I took it off Amazon. You know, just in case anyone's been looking for it.

... oh, I also rewrote stuff and now there's at least one different thing that didn't happen in the original version. So, hey, if I do get it published, that's one more reason to buy it again. :)

-- I'm in my senior year! Which means I'm working on the first part of my Capstone (senior project). The fall semester is the planning stage, the spring semester is the execution. This year, it seems I'm the only one writing a novel. I planned out my schedule for next semester and I figured I can send out 10,000 words a week to my committee members in January and February. So, you know, the fact that I've already had to put aside my NaNo project because school swallowed my time is something I can make up for when I'm pounding out an entire YA novel in a two-and-a-half month stretch. (I'm going to work on it during the break. PLEASE SEND HELP.)

I'm hoping I can replace my tablet, though. I have a little one that's good for writing notes (I've got a handwriting-to-text app that works wonderfully), but not so much for writing for a long time, and my laptop's too heavy to be lugged around. Soooooo I'm either going to have to juggle my financial aid or work my ass off or sell a few things so I can get a damn tablet with an accompanying detachable keyboard so I can be ready to type at a moment's notice.

But in any event, I've got three more classes in the spring (one of which is Capstone II) and then I'm done, done, DONE. \o/

-- I'm down to the cat, the tarantula, and the chinchilla. No more snake, no more rat. The rat, Abe, died last week, sadly, especially considering what a snuggler he was.

-- Uh, I'm still not talking to my dad. Or the rest of my family, really, because I'm pissed at nearly every single one of them except for my brother. This Thanksgiving, I may actually do what I've always wanted and just make a big bowl of candied sweet potatoes and eat them all myself while catching up on all of the TV shows I'm behind on.

-- I'm up to eight tattoos! I've got Storm and Jubilee on my right arm and "My feelings are valid" on my left arm. I'd really like to get some more, but alas ... no money.

-- My hair is purple! The general consensus is that this was an excellent decision and I should never, ever change it.
apocalypsos: (Default)

So ... yeah. I haven't posted in a while, mostly because I'm usually over on Tumblr these days (and more recently Twitter as well) at everythingsbetterwithbisexuals. But first off, quick summary of the year so far:

Still not talking to my dad; not talking to my mom either; not talking to a lot of my family, actually; my great-aunt's dying of lung cancer; I'm in my senior year at Keystone and doing great; my snake died; I still have the same work-from-home job; I bought a Beetle a few months ago; and I've got an agent again!

Also, my hair is currently dark purple. So there's that.

ANYWAY. It's Yuletide again, and I whipped up a few requests pretty quickly, so I'm throwing together a Dear Santa letter for my prospective writer.

Dear Yuletide Santa ... )
apocalypsos: (i'm saddened by parker's glumface)
If anybody's around right now, I literally need five bucks for gas money. Sounds stupid, I know, but the gift card I saved for just such a reason is all fucked up and the customer service person said it would take a while to fix. Meanwhile, my classes at school start in two hours.

If anybody could spare five bucks to Paypal me ASAP, I would really appreciate it. I honestly just need to get to campus. There are gas station gift cards in the bookstore I can buy with my student ID to get me through the rest of the week.
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
I wrote four fics this year, which was a good kick in the ass in my writer’s block, quite frankly.

Swing was my original assignment. My recipient asked for a “Poseidon Adventure” fic about Nonnie Parry and James Martin after the end of the movie, which I was thrilled to write because it was one of the prompts I was most hoping to get when I chose to write for that fandom. It’s a bit shorter than I was hoping to write — I think I got a bit overwhelmed with my options — but I quite liked how it turned out.

Flotsam was possibly my favorite story which I got to write. I liked all of them, but honestly, when I saw a request for “Psycho” fic, I pounced. Since it’s one of my favorite movies, I couldn’t resist, and after watching it twice I wanted to follow Lila after the movie and see how she was getting on. It just struck me that we don’t see her cry after everything that’s gone on, when she has plenty of reason to.

Leaving the Nest is the one which got the most attention and whatnot. I saw a “Lilo and Stitch” request on the pinch hit list and grabbed it, and I was pleased that it got the response that it did because it was probably the piece I was most worried about when I posted it. I think I just wished I had longer to write it because there was so much more to explore in Lilo and Nani’s future, and I only had a few short hours in which to write it. I loved my original prompt, but I also would have adored getting this one at the beginning.

And Bookshelves was the last pinch hit I took for “Frances Ha,” so the only reason I didn’t write a ten-thousand-word epic was because I was literally tossing the thing together in the last couple of hours. I did have ideas for femmeslash when I picked the prompt, but because of the timing I kept it simple and went with a short slice-of-life piece instead. And I totally pretended to watch the film later than I did, because I didn’t want anyone to guess what I wrote and I’m a dork like that. :)


Dec. 25th, 2013 05:24 pm
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
I still have to sit down and read my gift, so if my Santa is reading this, I swear I will review it just as soon as I get done with overtime work today. (I got a Galaxy Quest story about Guy, so I'm bouncing up and down in my seat because I can't WAIT to read it.)

As for me, I wrote four stories this year in four different fandoms. If you can guess any of them, I'll write a story for you. :)
apocalypsos: (i'm an amused children's bullfighter)
Last year, I defaulted on Yuletide.

This year, I completed my assignment and did three pinch hits beside that. And I have time tonight to do stocking stuffers if I want. \o/
apocalypsos: (i'm saddened by parker's glumface)
That would be me, by choice, because my family is full of assholes.

Well, that's not entirely true. See, at Thanksgiving I found out that one of my aunts apparently never got the memo that you don't discuss religion or politics with family unless you want to get into a fight, as she decided to go off on Obamacare (and told me I needed to watch more Fox News when I protested, which made me want to gag). Which, hey, I happen to like, even though I'd like universal healthcare a hell of a lot better. But anyway, she, one of my cousins, my dad, and my grandfather then decided to patronize and condescend to me, treat me like a moron for the next twenty minutes, and tell me to shut up repeatedly when I tried to question the "facts" they brought up or the bullshit anecdotes about shifty poor people they knew.

Needless to say, I had a breakdown and yelled at them all. I think my favorite part may have been when I brought up my depression and anxiety and said that their racist comments were a trigger. At which point my aunt said, "What, so I'm supposed to walk on eggshells around you now?" At which point *I* asked if that meant she didn't care about my mental health.

As if she already hadn't literally done everything wrong, she proceeded to say, "You think I don't love you?", accused me of not being who she thought I was, and burst into tears, successfully making my admission about my depression all about her.

... yeah, I kinda left right after that.

So I haven't talked to anybody from my family except for a few texts to my brother since then, and I'm staying home for Christmas for the first time ever. (I've also been bombing my Facebook with every Republicans-being-douchebags news story I can find, because half of the people on my Facebook are my relatives.) In a toss-up between my family and my pets, my pets win right now, because at least they seem to like me.

But I'm more cool with that than I thought I would be. Honestly, I just want to stay home the next couple of days and work and write and snap up Yuletide pinch hits and eat junk food. My weight's held steady at about 150-145 pounds for a while now (depending on which scale you use at my house), which I'm also happy with. Oh, and guess who got straight As again this semester? ;)

In any event, if anybody wants to do anything for me for Christmas, the only thing I really want right now is new glasses. Well, specifically, Harry Potter glasses. (I've already ordered a pair of pretty purple glasses from my optometrist, but her selection is pretty narrow.) And I found frames on Zenni Optical, which I plan to splurge on with all the extras. I plan on ordering them when I get paid this week, but if anyone wants to chip in for Christmas, a gift card for Zenni or a few bucks in my Paypal would help out. I also have to start in on Oscarwatch, so some extra money for popcorn would be nice. :)

Oh, and a couple of people messaged me about Apocalyptothon, which ... erm, I still have to talk with soundingsea about. I'm a little busy for it in the spring, but we may open it up for other people to help so that we can actually have one this year. We'll see.
apocalypsos: (i cannot believe you just said that)
If you friended me on Facebook, I just deleted it. Family holiday drama finally drove me to do what I've been wanting to do for a while.

Still, I do plan to start a professional Facebook, so when I do I'll give a head's up what name it's under.
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
-- If anybody's looking for me on Tumblr, I changed my username to everythingsbetterwithbisexuals. Just because everything I seem to be writing right now has a bisexual character in it. Apparently, somebody already pounced on my previous username, so ... you know, whatever.

-- I may have found a way to write my personal ethics code for business ethics class not as an academic paper, but as a short story about the garment worker strikes in the early 20th century and the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory. Hey, whatever works.

-- Still nothing heard from the agent I sent "Heroine Addiction" to. It's been about three months, but I've already sent him an "Uh, hi! You still alive?" email (but more polite and professional) so it's just sitting and waiting right now.
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
-- I'm so broke. I'm sooooooo broke. I mean, I'm okay, I'm not going to starve to death or anything, and it helps that Thanksgiving is coming up so I get a bit of a break, but still. I've been routinely paying my rent two weeks late for months now, but thankfully my landlord is understanding. Still, I'm so sick of being behind on bills and stuff, and I'm not looking forward to another Christmas where I can't give anyone anything. (Although my brother did offer to let me go 80/20 on gifts until I get bonuses and financial aid and taxes in January, since he's got a ton of money thanks to his job.)

-- On the plus side, my uncle got married on Saturday! He lives in New Jersey and he and his partner have been together something like forty years. They got a civil union a few years ago for the legal coverage, but once the marriage stuff went through and Chris Christie stopped being a douchebag, he pretty much ran out and got them a marriage license. We didn't get to go -- it was a VERY small ceremony because Werner wanted to keep things pretty low-key and private -- but I'm just really happy for the both of them. My uncle Bobby is a lovely person and so is Werner.

-- I still haven't heard back from the agent about "Heroine Addiction" yet. I did send him a short email to say hi and remind him that I'm alive, and he was really nice when he replied. He apologized and said he'd send me something more "substantial" later, so I'm hoping that's a good sign.

-- I've sort of given up on NaNo just because I have a couple of really big papers to get done with and I'm understandably more concerned about getting them done and done well. So I doubt I would be able to get that amount of work done this month on any story.

That said, once finals are over, I'm going to be all over this story like crazy. Not being able to write it means I've been able to brainstorm and plot and basically play around with ideas more, and I've got a couple of solid ideas that I'm itching to write.

Oh, and it's the HA sequel, if anybody's interested. ;)

-- I just wanted to share that I wore four-inch heels to a scholarship luncheon at school today and afterward on the way to class I fell down four stairs onto my butt because I was trying to walk in them and talk to a friend at the same time, and that's why I should learn to stick with boots and ballet flats and sneakers as per usual.

-- I bought new bedding about a month and a half ago, and I have never had bedding that wasn't a hand-me-down from a relative, and it's warm and snuggly and is orange microsuede-ish material underneath it, and it's possible I'm way more in love with it than a normal person should be.

-- Fandoms! Elementary's having a bit of a sophomore slump but I still love it, I'm behind on the Tomorrow People and I can't say I'm as enthusiastic as I would like to catch up, Arrow has become total crack for me, I started watching Brooklyn Nine-Nine and with the exception of Andy Samburg I'm in love, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. is finally growing on me even though I still think Ward is being played by a blandly handsome block of wood, and I adore Sleepy Hollow with every fiber of my being.


Oct. 18th, 2013 10:31 pm
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)

apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
Guys, you don't even KNOW. It is exactly what I was hoping it would be when I signed up for that particular fandom. (I actually had two prompt ideas that I was hoping it would be, but one slightly more than the other simply because there was less research to do with this one.) I so cannot wait to write this.

*claps hands in glee*

Anyway. My letter to my Yuletide Santa:

Hi! As always, I'm so glad you're going to write me something, and I want to thank you in advance not only because I'm grateful you'd take the time to write me a story, but also because ... well, I can get a bit forgetful and do stupid stuff like not tell you how awesome I think your story is after it's posted, and better to prepare ahead of time.

A basic idea of my likes and dislikes:

I'm game for anything, really. My prompts don't exactly involve a lot of possibilities for sex, I suppose, but if you want to write it, go nuts. I'm open to het, slash, femmeslash, poly ... whatever. I'm open to anything sexually except for watersports and whatnot, because ... ew, but again, I doubt that'll come up.

Content-wise, I like a good sense of humor, sharp dialogue, and a good grasp on the characters. Honestly, if you think your story is taking off in a good direction that might not be exactly what I asked for, go for it. I'd rather a well-written story which wavers from what I asked for than a less-well-written story that sticks to my requests. The fandoms I asked for I all adore, so I can safely say that you'll find plenty of leeway with me.

So, request-specific stuff:

"The Tomorrow People (2013)": So I just started watching this show and I'm already totally hooked on Stephen. I just, you know, want him to be able to go have a little fun for a change, especially with everything that's gone on in just a few short episodes. I like Cara well enough, but Stephen/Cara is not my ship. I like her just fine with John and I prefer Stephen with Astrid (or John, when I'm feeling slashy). But yes, fun times all around. Maybe after they find their promised land?

"Now You See Me": I just really, really, really, really want to see Dylan do magic. I found Mark Ruffalo insanely hot at the end of that movie, and I want to see more. How did he get in the Eye? Has he been doing magic while in the FBI? If you're not into that, I'm also love Jack Wilder, and wouldn't mind reading a story about how he became so good at fighting the way he did.

"Galaxy Quest": Oh, man, I just want Guy getting to go to his very first con after the reboot airs, and he's not just there as some extra but as a genuine member of the cast. I want him getting to have fun signing autographs, and connecting with fans who come up to the table genuinely emotional about his journey from extra to cast member, and little friendly moments with the rest of the cast. I want Guy living the dream, you know?

"Elementary": Okay, so you know how last week Joan looked as though she was starting to write a book on Sherlock so that others would know him the way she does? I want to see what happens when that book becomes published. Would Sherlock be annoyed or proud? Would it help them solve cases, or would it get in the way of investigations? Feel free to write either friendship or Joanlock, because I am equally game for both.

Again, thank you SO MUCH. I hope you have fun writing! :)

apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
My brother got his first tattoo!

He's a gamer, so I kept telling him that if he was going to get video game tattoos, stick with the classics. He found these tats online on someone else and fell for them, because his favorite games ever are the Final Fantasy series.

He still has to get two more on his other arm, so hopefully since I had to miss going tonight to work, I can go next time.

My own tattoo has reached that itchy stage that makes me want to rip my arm off. Owwwwww.
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)

So my birthday is this Sunday, and I've lost a little over forty-five pounds this year. So, as a present to myself for both, I decided to get a new tattoo.

I went with my notebook-lines-on-my-forearm idea for both symbolic and practical reasons. Symbolic, because an empty sheet of paper needs to be filled with stories and poems and whatever else is in my head. Practical, because sometimes I write on my arms and hands and whatnot and I might as well have some lines to write on.

I think I'm in love with it already. :)

(Oh, and my brother's scheduled an appointment for his first tattoo this Saturday. I'll have to take pictures, because he found the design online and it should turn out awesome if it's done right.)
apocalypsos: (Default)
So for anybody who's been wondering what's going on with me:

-- I finished my internship a couple of weeks ago and got an A, which ... yay! I didn't get a chance to meet my mentor face to face, but she was really great, and I'm sort of hoping I can do my second internship with her next summer. (Maybe. I'm still debating if I even want to do summer classes again next summer. Not having a break this year was brutal.)

-- I also finished my social diversity class and got an A in that, too. My final project was to participate in an ethnic or cultural event which I've never been to before, so I attended morning services at Temple Israel in Scranton. I don't know if you can say you had fun at a prayer service, but everyone was so lovely and helped tell me what page we were on in the prayer book since everything was in Hebrew (which I expected, but still). Being raised Catholic had its advantages and disadvantanges. On one hand, when other people stand, I stand -- I've got that rule ingrained in my head. On the other hand, people were walking around and greeting each other, including me, during prayers, and there's a part of my brain that kept saying, "But ... but you're just supposed to sit there and repeat what the priest says!" I had a great time, though, and the building was gorgeous.

-- Right now, I'm in the first couple of weeks on my new semester. I have business ethics online (which seems pretty laidback so far), technical writing (with the awesome new teacher who used to be a plus-sized model), and web design, a class in which I am sitting next to a girl who put a Deadpool wallpaper on her computer and laughed when I made a Geocities joke on the web page I was writing for class. So either I've made a friend or I've proven I'm an enormous geek. Or both.

-- The agent who's looking at "Heroine Addiction" still hasn't gotten to me to say whether or not he'll take me on. He did tell me he's a slow reader, though, and we spoke on the phone and had a great conversation where we really clicked (especially when we started in on comics and talked about Marvel vs. DC), so I've got my fingers crossed.

-- I scheduled an appointment to get a new tattoo. I was going to get it tomorrow, but a.) I'm more broke than I thought I would be and b.) I've had the flu for the past week and it's still hanging around. So I rescheduled for later this month. My birthday's at the end of the month, so if anybody wanted to chip in for my tat, I'd love you forever and make you cookies. (Just kidding, honestly. I think my brother's going to chip in money for it, and I have an Amazon payment coming up, so I should be cool.)

-- Oh, yeah, the flu. Which I got from my brother last weekend, and spent the rest of the week trying to fight off and failing miserably. I'm still tired and have a sore throat, but I'm not feeling as awful as I did on, say, Wednesday when my fever spiked. Good times. *eye roll*

-- Also, I blame the flu for the fact that I'm still losing weight even though I haven't exercised in a few weeks and I've barely eaten anything. And not in a "I'm just too busy or distracted to eat" sort of way, but in a "I genuinely haven't had any appetite in a week" sort of way, which is just annoying. I've been forcing myself to eat, though, which is good, but it's mostly poking at diet frozen dinners with a fork.

When I weighed myself this morning on the crappy scale I first started weighing myself on in January, I finally cracked the 150-pound line to hit 149 pounds, which puts my weight loss at 46 pounds since the start of the year. Not the best way to do it, obviously, but still. I'm hoping to start back up on the cottage cheese, fruit, and diet bread again tomorrow, because I don't want to get back into bad habits. Still, I'm only nine pounds from the goal I gave myself in January. \o/
apocalypsos: (i'm an amused children's bullfighter)
So the agent I'm working with for my internship is all kinds of awesome, and I'm loving the hell out of almost everything (pitching books during conference calls is the worst part just because, ugh, talking on the phone AND public speaking rolled into one), and the cool part is that my advisor has been dorking out over my journal entries that I have to keep sending in.

Anyway, part of the internship is those conference calls for the interns where we talk about imprints and subrights and editing and a whole bunch of things that I already usually know pretty well before we even start. In any event, a couple of weeks ago, we had a conference call on book pitches, and our "homework" was to write up a book pitch for any book we wanted and send it to the agent we're working under to be critiqued.

So, since I needed to practice writing it up for query letters, I used "Heroine Addiction."

Which, I know, is probably a little tacky, but whatever. So I sent the agent I'm working with the book pitch and went back to working on whatever else I had to.

A few days later, she emailed me back and asked if she could give the manuscript to someone else at the agency.

So after I stopped flailing, I sent her the manuscript. I didn't figure I'd hear anything anytime soon, but I got bored the other day and started looking through the bios on the agency's website, because she didn't say who it was she gave it to. I found one who said he usually did non-fiction, but that he worked with pop culture, loves comics, and likes things with a quirky sense of humor and unique subcultures.

When she emailed me today, it turned out I guessed right and that's the guy she gave the book to. Heh. I'm smaaaaaart.

I hope something comes out of it, but I'm realistic enough to just be happy that apparently I can write a good book pitch. :)
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
-- So I've sent out the second query to an agent for "Heroine Addiction" to see if I can get it published by a traditional publisher. The first one got shot down. Have I mentioned I hate writing queries?

-- I took next week off, which means I'll have plenty of time to look for a new job. Which is good, because I am literally THIS CLOSE to just quitting. Whenever I think it might possibly not be so stressful, it gets so much worse. (Case in point: We keep getting sent worksheets of claims which need to be processed that day. If we can't finish, we have to email our supervisor as to why we couldn't get them done every damn day. So basically we're expected to make excuses why we're not good enough every night, unless of course we manage to do ten to twelve hours of work whether we want to or not.)

-- The job is stressing me out so much that today I logged out so I wouldn't have a panic attack and call one of my supervisors to yell at her, then went to the cottage at the lake my parents are renting for the next two weeks for a breather, *then* left to come home to finish my work only to feel a panic attack coming on the closer I got to my apartment, THEN got pulled over by a cop for speeding in an attempt to get home before I had a panic attack. He gave me a ticket even though when he came back to my car with my paperwork, I was bent over the steering wheel hyperventilating.

You're goddamn right I'm pleading not guilty. I've never done it before but I'd genuinely like the cop try to explain to the magistrate the reasoning behind giving a speeding ticket to someone who was clearly having a medical emergency.

(He offered to call EMS, but seriously, fuck that. I would rather drive the two blocks to my parents' house and have my brother calm me down than sit there and wait for medical attention with a guy who's too busy trying to give me a $112 ticket to give more than a passing shit about me.)

-- Aaaaaaand now I have to work for the rest of the night, which means I've felt on the edge of another panic attack since something like noon.

I seriously cannot wait until tomorrow, when I can go to the lake and sit on the dock and get wasted while reading a good book.
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
So in addition to my awesome internship (which, seriously, if anyone can think of a great blog which doesn't have a book deal, I could use a few suggestions for an assignment I have due on Tuesday), I also took Social Diversity online to fulfill my social sciences requirement.

It's a pretty small group, and last week three of us and the teacher had dinner together and they were all lovely. There were two other students who couldn't attend, one of whom has seemed quite nice so far. The other is an Afghan war veteran who ... well, let's just say the best thing I can say is that he's completely honest about his totally unapologetic hatred of Muslims.

Last week we discussed discrimination, and our forum assignments included a choice between four questions to answer, one of which was about hate crimes. He chose that question, then proceeded to write a long rant about how much he hates Muslims now, and how it's okay because of what he saw in Afghanistan, and also we give everybody participation awards which is somehow related to how awful Muslims are in an argument I couldn't even follow, and also 9/11!!!, and then he posted a video about a bunch of Muslims throwing stones at Christians in Michigan or something. (He summarized the video before posting it, which was good because I was already feeling the urge to throw up even before I was supposed to watch it so I didn't.)

I would never have seen it if our teacher hadn't told us to go over and respond (he didn't answer the question until the very last day on Friday), presumably -- considering her personality when we met -- for the rest of us to call him on his bullshit. So basically I just spent the past two hours writing a very, VERY carefully worded takedown of everything he said, alternated with short bursts of switching over to Tumblr and cursing out loud so as to avoid calling him an idiotic racist belligerent dipshit in a class-related setting.

I really love this class, but Jesus, I am really glad this is an online course and I never have to meet this bigoted fucker face-to-face.
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
Since I'm still running a little low on funds, here's a link back to my original post about the short story collection I threw together to sell.

I'm maybe like twenty-five bucks short of rent, but I'd much rather get it from selling something than asking my mom or my brother (who's making an absurd amount of money at his new job, which is upsetting me and my piecerate-paycheck-earning ass more than I'd like, because it's not his fault my dad is a sexist idiot who never bothered to let me work with him as a teenager instead of at Burger King so I'd have construction work on my resume instead of customer service experience).

Okay, SO.

May. 29th, 2013 10:33 pm
apocalypsos: (i'm just shilling my books)
I’ve compiled four of my short stories into an ebook so that I can sell it and make a little extra money so that I won’t be as behind as I am right now.

The collection’s about 15k words and is called “In The Red.” All four stories are from my fiction classes from last spring and this past semester, so they’ve been polished within an inch of their lives for competitions and finals and whatnot. All four feature female protagonists. Trigger warning for mass murder, zombies, rape prior to the story, and the apocalypse.

I’m asking for two bucks a copy, but that’s only a suggested price. Basically, Paypal me whatever you want and I’ll send you a copy.
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
A couple of people have been very helpful, and thank you, seriously -- I haven't been able to say a proper thank-you between the holiday and trying to get school in order and work being a pain in my ass. And now my checking account's in the red, which is a pain. I get paid on Friday, but ... well, rent, so. *shrug*

In any event, I'm thinking about taking two of the longer stories I wrote in my fiction classes, putting them in an ePub or MOBI or whatever anybody needs, and selling them for a couple of bucks. I'm working on getting "Monsters" done finally but everything's swallowing all of my free time, and the gay romance I was working on up until everything went to shit is going to have to wait until I can breathe again.

So, yeah. I may have something to sell sometime tomorrow. I don't know what I'm going to do for a cover, but whatever.
apocalypsos: (i think that's going to leave a mark)
... is exactly as embarrassing as you think.

I took my car in this morning because it needed an oil change, new brake pads, and possibly new rotors. My $408 paycheck this week should have covered it. I then proceeded over the course of the morning to get three phone calls from the garage:

Phone call #1: "Yes, you do need rotors. Everything all together should cost you $350." (Me: *sigh* "Okay, whatever.")

Phone call #2: "Did you know your inspection's out?" (Me: "I thought ... fine, whatever. Do that, too.")

Phone call #3: "Sorry, but we can't let your car pass inspection because it needs front-end work." (Me: "Are you seri-- Wait, you know what? Just do the rest, because it's all I can fucking afford.")

At which point I went down there, already crying, and was told that the repairs my car needs to pass inspection total nearly four hundred fucking dollars.

I *should* be able to pay for it when I get my financial aid, but at the same time that was the final straw. I've been through so much stress over the past week I started crying right there and then -- oh, and protip to front desk agents: a crying woman who can barely afford to pay her bill as it is won't be able to get your company credit card, so don't bother fucking asking -- and barely made it to my car before I had a breakdown. And then I got home and had some more breakdown. And then I went to the minimart and bought a two-liter of Pepsi and a big bag of Cheetos and ate half the bag and drank half the bottle and had another breakdown.

I just really need a goddamn break for a change, I swear to God.
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
Have I ever mentioned how much I love it when I have car problems the day I get my paycheck which then proceed to swallow my paycheck nearly whole, leaving behind a few miserable crumbs in their wake?

apocalypsos: (i think that's going to leave a mark)
For starters, work. They're offering unlimited overtime, which would be great, except they're sending up spreadsheets from which we need to complete all of the claims on it and there's at least nine hours worth of claims on it for each weekday. This isn't counting claims we previously sent to other departments and now have to finish, or letters we have to write to providers. If I ended up doing the entire spreadsheet, I would be on the computer for ten hours a day, at least. Just the stress of trying to get it done is frying my brain. If I’m going to have to do overtime, I would rather do an extra eight hours on Saturday, rather than longer days during the week. It’s too much for my nerves when I can barely leave the house or take a break to exercise. I’ve been pretty much forcing myself to go out and walk or take a bike ride at this point because damn it, if I’m going to be stressed out, I need to get out of here once in a while, especially now that the weather’s nice.

It doesn’t help that I can’t drive my car right now. My brakes were fine, not squeaking, and then all of a sudden they started grinding the other day. Even if I do need new routers — I definitely need new brake pads, and I already needed an oil change — I should be able to afford it this week. At least, I hope so. It would be a lot easier if I could use financial aid toward it, but that’s another issue I have to deal with.

I got a remote internship for the summer, which is awesome, and I filled out the paperwork with my advisor to get credit. But she can’t confirm it until I give her a few pieces of information like job duties and learning objectives. But I can’t give her those because while I took notes regarding those things during my first call with the agent I’m going to work with, I can’t find them, and the email I sent to my agent probably won’t get answered until this weekend because she is crazy-busy and it takes her a bit to respond. So my class can’t get confirmed, which means my financial aid can’t get confirmed, which means I can’t use it to fix my car, which means I have to use my paycheck toward that, which I *also* have to use because someone screwed up along the line and I owe $41 for the spring semester. And if I don’t pay that, I also can’t get my financial aid.

Also, I have a buck in my bank account. Which wouldn’t be so bad (I've got plenty of groceries and my utilities and rent are all paid) if it weren’t for the car and the school bill and the need to just take a damn *break.* I’m seriously debating skipping the Heart Walk this Saturday, even though I want to do it, because I just can’t deal with this week anymore.

I wish I could take one night and get drunk and eat a whole bacon cheeseburger pizza and cry a lot.
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
So I didn't move to the semifinals in the Amazon contest, which I'm cool with. Why? Because my Publisher’s Weekly review from the contest is really, really good. :D

Supervillainy mixes with soap opera in this imaginative and entertaining adventure tale of doughty heroes, dastardly plots, and dark family secrets. Teleporter Vera Noble — daughter of super-strong Paladin (aka: Ivy Noble) and mind-reader Wavelength (aka: Everett Noble), the world’s favorite super couple — hung up her cape five years ago to build a normal life. As the owner of a coffeehouse in a quiet small town, the worst she faces is occasionally bumping into her tattoo artist ex, and finding notorious supervillain Morris Kemp, aka: the Quiz Master, sitting in booth five. The truth is that her dad left her mom to shack up with Morris, a secret her parents have hidden for years now. But now Dad is leaving Morris and coming home. Whatever caused the change — robot, clone, brainwashing, amnesia, or something more insidious, Everett Noble isn’t himself. Then Morris turns up dead and Vera’s brother Graham (aka: Fortress) is arrested for the murder. Determined to learn the truth, Vera starts to dig, only to find herself stuffed in another superhero’s body with no idea who to trust. This action-packed mystery, along the lines of The Incredibles, reminds readers that being “super” doesn’t make you immune from being human.
apocalypsos: (Default)
So as part of my exercise routine and because of my mom's stroke, I signed up for the American Heart Association Heart Walk in Scranton on May 18. I posted my donation page on Facebook, but I figured I would post a link here as well.

Thanks to anybody who supports me in the Heart Walk! :)
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
  • I've lost twenty pounds so far this year.
  • I am thiiiiiiis close to cracking 180 pounds on my digital scale. (I have a cheap scale I bought years ago and the digital scale I bought about six weeks ago. The digital scale reads six pounds heavier than the cheap scale. The cheap scale read me at the start of the year as 195 pounds. So when the digital scale reads me as 179 pounds, which it'll probably do tomorrow morning, I'll probably do a little dance in my bathroom.)
  • I don't have a coronary when I go up a flight of stairs anymore.
  • My favorite XL yoga pants are now bagging at the waist so much I have to keep yanking them up.
  • I went digging through my closet looking for a top to wear to a family dinner at a nice restaurant tomorrow night and found a cute red sweater I bought a couple of months ago when I got my first tax refund. I made the mistake of not trying it on before I brought it home back then -- it was a large and I figured I wouldn't have to -- and when I got it home I couldn't even button it shut. I tried it on just now, and aside from being a little tight over my boobs, it fits just fine.
I'm not going to lie -- I'm a little giddy about dinner tomorrow night and Easter dinner Sunday. Tomorrow's dinner is for my parents' wedding anniversary, and my grandfather and my cousin, both of whom haven't seen me since I started this whole thing, will be there. Then on Sunday, there'll be more relatives there who haven't seen me since I started this.

Apparently my mom has been telling people I've been working out and dieting and losing a whole bunch of weight, which I get, but I also kinda wish she hadn't, just because I'm finding I like the phrase, "Oh, wow, you've lost weight!" more when people are surprised. Yes ... yes, I have. :D

I signed up for the American Heart Association Heart Walk in Scranton in May, so right now I'm just "training" for that, such as it is. I got my mom to say she'd do the Heart Walk with me so I can't cop out, but it also means I have to be able to walk a few circuits around Nay Aug Park without passing out. 

My goal is to crack 140 pounds. To be honest, I'd be happy to get back below 150 pounds, but I'm aiming for the 130-somethings mostly because my mom's 145 pounds and I kinda want to be skinnier than her. And I'm really, really patient when it comes to this whole thing. I want to be there by Christmas, which is seriously not a huge expectation considering this isn't as difficult to stick to as I was afraid it would be. Normally when I try to drop weight, it works but after a few weeks I miss Cheetos and Pepsi and burgers and pizza and I quit. This time ... not so much. 
apocalypsos: (Default)
So I've had Pugsley for two months now and getting him to eat has been impossible. Which isn't a bad thing, per se, since most people I've talked to said he might take a while to finally eat.

Anyway, last night I bought more frozen fuzzies and put one in with him, then put a blanket over his cage to give him some alone time. When I went to check on him fifteen minutes later, there was an itty bitty mouse butt hanging out of his mouth. Heh.

I may have danced around my apartment to celebrate, which just proves I am so very easily amused.
apocalypsos: (i'm just happy to be here today)
Or the alternate title for this post, "A quick update about 'Monsters of Moosic', BUT NOT THAT UPDATE OMG DON'T GET AHEAD OF ME HERE."

Basically, I am done with work for this week. Okay, that's sort of a lie, because technically I should have worked until I either reached my quota or reached forty hours, but I still had three hours and 250 processed claims to go, and since I just spent an entire day pending claims from the same damn provider to the same damn department, which I don't think I need to point out means that I processed almost nothing today, I finally just said, "Oh, my God, fuck this noise," stopped working, and emailed my supervisor my damn payroll sheet.

If he asks me why I stopped early, I'm just going to point to the "pended claims" column on my sheet and glare. Goddamn it, I was getting quota every damn week until this ridiculous excuse for a workday, I swear.

ANYWAY. Aside from the fact that today has been as frustrating as possible, I am now ecstatic for another reason. Want to know why?

Because guess who has two thumbs and took all of next week off with the express purpose of finishing the edit on "Monsters of Moosic" or else?


... this video is entirely necessary. Mmm-hmm.

Okay, now to go exercise and write "A&P" futurefic. (Not even joking. We had to read the story for my fiction class today, and that's our assignment for tomorrow.)
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
The way the semi-finalists are chosen is that Publisher’s Weekly goes through all of the quarterfinalists’ full manuscripts and the editors decide who moves onto the semis.

apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
... would you care to leave a review on my "Heroine Addiction" entry for the Amazon contest?

I'm not sure if it impacts whether or not I get into the semifinals, but it's worth a shot.

If you do, just remember:

1. Make sure to download the free preview, even if you already have the whole book.
2. Only review the portion in the preview, not the whole book, just in case.

If I'm remembering correctly, the prize for semifinalists is a review by Publisher's Weekly. I don't think I have to emphasize how completely fucking awesome that would be. :)
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
So, the house that my parents want me to buy?

The asking price is $46,000.

Now, keep in mind that as soon as my mom heard this from the neighbor across the street from the house, who’s apparently been speaking with the owner, my mom said, “Tell him I said he’s fucking nuts.”

For starters, the guy bought it for $23,000 not even a year ago. It is not a big house. It’s big enough for one person or maybe a couple, but that’s it. It’s not the fanciest house in the world, and it still needs work. He replaced the furnace, and he got rid of some of the crap inside it that the last owner left behind. And then he doubled the price.

It’s a small house in a small town. I don’t think the owner quite realizes how stupid he is to ask for that around here, because he sure as hell isn’t likely to get it. The owner’s from New Jersey, so maybe that’s influencing the asking price, but … seriously, come on. My parents bought the house next door to them to tear down last year (the one between their house and the house for sale), and they only paid $20k for it, and it wasn’t all that much worse off than the house for sale. (They mostly bought it because the worst neighbor we ever had lived there and my mom desperately wanted to buy it and tear it down out of spite.)

So for right now, we’re waiting on him to get his head out of his ass and lower the asking price, and hopefully not to get any nibbles by anyone dumb enough to take him up on the asking price until then.
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
*happy dance*

The first few thousand words of "Heroine Addiction" are available free here for the contest, and while I know that a few of you were nice enough to review it on the official page on Amazon (and thank you SO MUCH for that, seriously), any of you who have the time and would be willing to go over and put in on a good word at the link ... I would really appreciate it. Obviously, since they only have the first nine pages or so available, it's probably best just to review those few pages, since the entire novel itself isn't available through the contest itself just yet.

I'm not exactly sure if reviews are necessary, but they sure as hell can't hurt. ;)

Oh, and check out the other quarterfinalists's entries as well (searching for the contest title brings them up). I plan to do that myself when I get a chance later on. I'm just happy I ended up a quarterfinalist. If the book goes any further, I'm fairly sure I'll implode.
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
I started out this morning just planning to get some exercise in, finish some homework ... nothing major.

Now apparently I'm buying a house. Maybe. IDEK.

(The house next door to my parents is for sale. It's not the fanciest house in the world, but there's nothing wrong with it and it's bound to be absurdly cheap considering the area. And I don't have a problem living next door to my parents, and I can borrow against my 401k. And to be honest, I think the only reason I haven't looked into buying a house around here is because I'm terrified of the whole process. That said ... no, seriously, that escalated really quickly.)
apocalypsos: (i'm an amused children's bullfighter)
... but I've been trying to lose weight since the start of the year. And it's working, which is awesome.

I started out the year at about 195 pounds, and I hit 180 the last few days. I've managed to cut all of the crap out of my diet with the exception of my weekly treat -- I get one crappy meal a week so I don't get frustrated and stop -- and I've been exercising pretty regularly, which should become more frequent when the weather gets warmer. (I bought a new basketball and I'm getting a folding bike with my amended tax refund so that I can try to ride every day no matter where I go.)

My belly seems to be getting smaller before everything else, which I have nooooooo problem with. I haven't worn any of my jeans in a while -- partly because they made me uncomfortable around the waist and partly because working from home means quite frankly I don't have to wear pants at all if I don't want to -- but I put a pair on today and they're neither digging into my waist nor giving me a poochy belly.

I'd like to be down to 130 pounds by the end of the year. I'm seriously not in a hurry to lose the weight, I'd much rather just get back into shape again. I signed up for the American Heart Association Heart Walk in May, and I asked my mom to do it with me so I can't cop out at the last minute. So basically I'm in training right now so I don't pass out twenty feet from the starting line.

It would be really awesome if I was down in the 140s by the first week of August, though, since my family has a sort of family reunion that weekend every year and it would be nice to talk about something other than "How's school going?" and "Why aren't you married yet?".
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
Fic: Snap Out Of It
Fandom: The Almighty Johnsons
Pairing: Anders/Gaia
Summary: After the goddess ceremony goes tits up, Anders doesn't want to get into it with Gaia because of Axl's feelings for her, even if his body disagrees with that decision. Gaia, however, has other ideas. Spawned from a prompt on the kink meme.


Can I just say how it's a little depressing that for AJ fandom, it seems like the kink meme is less kink and more "There's no fic for this fandom?! Oh, good, a place where I can request *everything*." Which, you know, is not a bad thing, especially considering there really isn't any fic out there for it. There really needs to be more people watching the show. (HINT, HINT.) But, yeah, I like some kink in my kink meme, damn it.

In any event, I've been shipping Anders/Gaia since the last episode of season two, and I will absolutely not be elaborating on that just in case anyone hasn't seen it yet. (No, seriously, HINT, HINT.) That said, I ship them in spite of the fact that I will freely acknowledge that Anders' entire sex life is one big consent issue. When he's not using his poetry to get laid, he's sleeping with goddesses who sometimes, in their own way, may be driven by something other than their own wants. (To be fair, in those instances he's in the same boat.) It's sort of like those romance novels where there's one chosen mate out there for the supernatural lead. I love those romance novels, but I will be the first to admit that's a little bit sketchy.

That said, I like Anders. I want him to become a better person. And I want to think Gaia would be good for him. So ... fic. :)
apocalypsos: (i cannot believe you just said that)
I wonder what it says about me that the thing that broke my recent bit of writer's block was writing a short story shipping Britain and America.
apocalypsos: (i'm just happy to be here today)
Which is great, because it was due today at 11:45. But then we didn't have class because of the storm, so instead -- thanks to the fact that I finished all my claims for work yesterday and I only have one more assignment to worry about that's due tomorrow at midnight -- I spent most of today slacking off on the couch watching "big Fat Quiz" clips on YouTube. I haven't had a Saturday off in FOREVER. :D

Anyway, here it is if anyone's interested. It's not perfect, but then again I think it's the one I'm workshopping so it doesn't really have to be.


The machete was meant for fieldwork. )
apocalypsos: (i agree with lacey's BISH PLZ)
Okay, seriously, there is STILL some girl in the LBD tag on Tumblr trying to reason that maybe some third party stole George and Lydia's sex tape or recorded them without their knowledge because she "doesn't want to think George could do this."

I ... I can't help you, lady.

([personal profile] beanarie, it's that same girl. You know who I'm talking about.)


Feb. 3rd, 2013 04:09 pm
apocalypsos: (i am surprised by you)
So I did my tax return last week and it was about $1500, which is on the upper end of what I normally get, which made me happy. But then I got the paperwork for my college tuition the other day, which somehow slipped my mind. (Probably because thanks to my online health class, I'm now apparently on an exercise program I didn't ask for. Not that I didn't expect to work out, since it's kind of why I signed up for the class in the first place since I've gained some weight from working at home, but my teacher's got some annoying rules about where we're supposed to run that requires going outside. Which, as someone who owns a treadmill, means I keep putting off exercising. So, you know, that's a big help. :| )

Anyway, I looked into adding it into the tax info I've already filed, and it means I now get something like $1700 more back.


Granted, I have to file an amended tax return seeing as how the first one was already accepted, and I have to wait until I get the first refund (which if I'm profoundly lucky will be this Friday) before sending it in, so I will probably not see the rest of it until March.


Oh, and working from home finally came in handy. La la la, writing off everything from rent to garbage tags, la la la.

Speaking of working from home, I *finally* reached quota this week! I think I figured out that I was too fixated on getting hours in, when what I really should be fixating on is my numbers. So instead of watching the clock last week, I basically sat down and worked until I reached 50 claims. Then I could take a little break, and then come back and do it all over again. And it works! I just put on QI episodes on YouTube or TV shows I haven't watched before on Netflix and the time flies by. :)

But, yeah. My refund's big enough that I can pay off my bills and still splurge on myself, so I'm getting two things I've been wanting for a while -- a new tattoo, and a pet snake. I'm actually thinking about getting two new tattoos, because one of the tats I want is "write something" in my own handwriting on the inside of my right wrist and that's not going to put much of a dent in my refund at all. I think this is my chance to finally get "this is the way the world ends, not with a bang but a whimper, which I will probably get on my back near my right shoulder.

Also ... yes, a snake. Because there will be a rat, a tarantula, and a snake, and now no one will ever come over my house again. MWAHAHAHAHA!

I've been wanting a ball python for the longest time, so if anyone's got any advice I'm all ears. I haven't had reptiles since I was a teenager and I've never had a snake, so I'll take all the advice I can get. God knows it came in handy with the tarantula. :) (Who is somehow still alive, to my tremendous surprise. Not because I'm a bad pet owner or anything, but ... c'mon, it's my first pet spider. Even though I know better, I'm still surprised I've had it over two years by now.)


apocalypsos: (Default)
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