I think Finn has reasons for behaving as he did. I don't think he has anything that stands up as an excuse for his behavior. And I feel like your comment overlooks the fact that Kurt is ALSO *16* and, as a gay kid in high school, one of the biggest pressure cookers for conformity there is, he has significantly less of a template for how to act on/with a crush. As a straight, shy kid, I might have worried about getting laughed at and mocked for liking/wanting someone out of my league or otherwise uninterested, but I never had to worried I'd be nailed to a fence for it.