(no subject)

[apocalypsos]

Spotted on IMDb ...

Catwoman helped Halle Berry cope with her husband Eric Benet's cheating ways because the character helped her escape her messy private life. Appearing on Oprah Winfrey's chat show in America tomorrow, Berry will reveal reports of her estranged husband Eric Benet's philandering were true - and she used her Catwoman character as therapy to deal with the heartache. She says, "I so needed to be Catwoman in that moment. I so needed to make some tough life decisions for myself, and putting on that suit made it a whole lot easier." Berry also tells Winfrey that she'll never wed again after two failed marriages to baseball player David Justice and soul singer Benet. She adds, "I always hate to say never to anything, but I will never marry again. It's probably the first time the tabloids got my life right."

I don't even know where to start making jokes about this. There's ... there's just so many ways to crack wise. Maybe if I lined up all my punchlines in a neat little row like ducklings ...

Also, I swear if one more moron posts a link to the US draft proposal on antiwar or free_america, I'm going to sign them up against their will for the Salvation Army. Try arguing against being forced to ring that fucking bell all holiday season, bee-yotch.

(And before anybody jumps on my back and starts arguing whether or not we're getting a draft and why there should or shouldn't be one, it's a joke, people. Remember me, the one who cracks wise about everything? And yes, I've had a tiresome day. Why do you ask?)

Comments

[paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com]

Maybe she should get spayed so she won't keep going into heat and picking the ones who are teh hawt sexx0rs rather than the ones who are actually decent guys.

[not to mention they both say she abused them and is psycho-jealous].

Time to put the cat out.

Okay, now I have cracked wise.

Please carry on. I can't wait to see yours.

Unspeakably vulgar. *is ashamed*

[altoidsaddict.livejournal.com]

She and her husband both used pussy to get through a tough time.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

*splorfle* Um, excuse me a sec, I just have to squeegee the water I spit out from my monitor screen.

Re: Unspeakably vulgar. *is ashamed*

[tsuki-no-yami.livejournal.com]

*bows and worships the funny*

[paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com]

Also: two new Day After Tomorrow fics. Hee.

Armageddon: Second Time Around
Brimstone: Final Details

[conuly]

Oh, god, seriously, that's number one (I think) on my list of things I NEVER EVER WANT TO SEE AGAIN, the draft links.

[gruyere.livejournal.com]

Oy ge-freakin-...nah, can't work up the energy to finish.

[hiddenw.livejournal.com]

I don't even know where to start making jokes about this.
I mean it's not even that much fun when they make it this easy. Not much fun which is to say not completely unfun.

[sekari.livejournal.com]

I so needed to make some tough life decisions for myself, and putting on that suit made it a whole lot easier."

what suit? That isn't a suit it's a bikini. They're making a catwoman movie with no catsuit. aaaarrrrrrrgggggg. I wish there was some way to stop the movie from being shown.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

My immediate thought upon reading that was, "... because no life decision could possibly be tougher than putting on that ugly-ass costume."

[sekari.livejournal.com]

i'm trying to think of an as bad or worse costume job, and I can't. There probably is one but I'm just missing it, but right now I can't think of a worse costume for a superhero character. I'd even take the 70's captain america and spider man movies over that.

[lots42.livejournal.com]

As far as I could tell, she put the suit on after suffering a beating.

Makes sense.

[lots42.livejournal.com]

What kind of idiot would cheat on Halle Berry? Fudge, man. She could eat wild crickets build shrines to Captain America and I'd still be loyal

[beanarie.livejournal.com]

I wondered the same thing when I watched it. She explained it away by saying he was a sex addict.

Oh, and I don't know if this was mentioned in the imdb blurb, but Halle also said that if she hasn't found her soulmate when she's forty, she's just going to turn to the dude she happens to be with and ask him to make a baby with her. I deuce you not.

[sekari.livejournal.com]

hmm. she'll need to be quarantined then.

I'm sorry, that was really mean. I'll shut up.

[teenygozer.livejournal.com]

Geez. It's nice to know that movie was good for *something*.

Jenn?

[seferin.livejournal.com]

What's the deal with the draft link? Is it fake?

Re: Jenn?

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

No, it's everywhere. People keep posting it over and over and over again without checking whether it's been posted before, and always with this same sense of "OMG, you've GOT to see this! Because you SO haven't see this before, right?!" It makes me want to club some sense into their heads with copies of the damn thing carved into baseball bats.