apocalypsos | (no subject)

I am going to make a big sign, and I'm going to put it on my office door, and it's going to say the following in bright pink blinking neon lights:

"I am the only one doing the job of two people who were doing the work of three people, and I am doing all of this in an eight-hour shift every day for the next two weeks without the vacation I was supposed to have at the end of this punishment. If you don't lay off and stop yelling things in at me like they're supposed to be helpful, I will take this big metal door and this blinking neon sign, I will pick any two random orifices on your body, and I will shove each of them so far in different, uncomfortable places it will take two teams of miners with hard hats and pickaxes to find them. And since every single annoying one of you is male, I will make sure to stuff both door and neon sign in the best possible orifices with which to simulate the painful birth of a pair of cranky blue whales. Thank you, and have a lovely day!"

...

Upon reading that, perhaps it's too subtle.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I would rather like to do that.
Alternatively, I'd like to invent a device that sent four thousand volts to the twerp on the other end of the phone. My job satisfaction would improve exponentially if I had that.

I'll second that!

When you invent one of those, I want one. Or maybe two, 'cause my mother does pretty much the same thing I do and that would make a terrific birthday present for her.

I'm working on it. I posted a letter to the fuckwits who call my office.

I think it may be a tad bit too complex for the male brain to comprehend.

How about "Go Fuck Yourself" - I think they'd all understand that :)

...I don't get it.

That is truly inspired. Perhaps you should copyright it and market little yellow signs for people to put on their doors. Then you wouldn't have to go to work anymore.

snerk.

That rant is a thing of beauty.
But I can't stop laughing at your icon. Poor thing.

while they may not get the message, it would at least delay their entrance for a few minutes while they read it?