apocalypsos: (shaun)
tatty bojangles ([personal profile] apocalypsos) wrote2004-10-16 10:41 am

(no subject)

Remember that Random Crappy Horror Movie Collection IIIVVAGFTHFJSXX I mentioned picking up yesterday?

"Crappy" is being generous. If the rest of the movies are as bad as this one ... *dies giggling* I feel like I'm watching a seventh-grader's class project. Well, except for the soft-core vampire porn. *goes back to laughing like a lunatic*

EDIT: Oh, I so have to TWoP-summarize this sucker to itty bitty pieces. *laughs hysterically*

HIGHLY AMUSED MOVIE CRITIC OF EDIT: If this is supposed to be porn, they're going to have to try to lower their expectations a tad. This is a little too much of an attempt at plot for porn.

[identity profile] seferin.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:21 am (UTC)(link)
Guy porn or girl porn... there IS a difference.

[identity profile] apocalypsos.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:41 am (UTC)(link)
I think it's supposed to be guy porn, what with all the breasts, but still, way too much plot. Jesus, stop skipping around and showing off that you can't act and fuck already. *eye roll*

Then again, I think I take that back, considering about how far from hot the porn is.

[identity profile] seferin.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:43 am (UTC)(link)
I am curious... as a woman, are there any male porn stars you find attractive, or like us, you watch it for the women.

[identity profile] apocalypsos.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:45 am (UTC)(link)
Well, I don't watch a lot of porn, but from what I've seen of male porn stars, there aren't many of them I'd want to watch. As for the chicks ... I don't know, maybe. Most of them actually look sexy, but then again, look who they have to work with.

Re:

[identity profile] apocalypsos.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:49 am (UTC)(link)
I don't know. This one's amusing the hell out of me, personally.

[identity profile] carolinecrane.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:57 am (UTC)(link)
All the hot male porn stars do gay porn. No, really. And now you *have* to tell me the name of the movie you're watching, because I think I've seen it.

[identity profile] apocalypsos.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 08:59 am (UTC)(link)
I think that was "Witchcraft X". Or "Witchcraft XI" ... I don't remember which side I put in the DVD player. All I know is it's hysterically bad, even for porn.

I kinda knew all the hot guys do gay porn, but hey, if I ever get the inclination to buy any, at least I'm game. :)

[identity profile] carolinecrane.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 09:11 am (UTC)(link)
Softcore disguised as horror is always funnier. And lucky you, you're starting at the end of the series where it's not so much with the 'horror' as it is with the 'softcore'. But I can't talk, because I've written fic based on DeCoteau movies.

[identity profile] seferin.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 09:12 am (UTC)(link)
I meant Why watch porn, where the men are unattractive?

[identity profile] mice.livejournal.com 2004-10-16 07:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Rent Jack Frost. Not the crapfest with Michael Keaton, but the crap fest with the holo-cover of a good snowman and an evil one.

If holo-cover and no sign of Michael Keaton (as a snowman) doesn't do it for you, maybe this phrase will: Snowman shower sex scene with a relocated carrot.

[identity profile] milkshake-b.livejournal.com 2004-10-17 12:25 am (UTC)(link)
**spittake**