I've figured it out. Compaq is trying to commit suicide by pissed-off customer.

[apocalypsos]

I really fucking do NOT want to do this anymore.

I'm sick of having conversations with customer service reps who are all too happy to point out that my warranty expired four days after they broke the laptop and LALALA we don't have to fix it! I'm sick of trying to yell at people only to fall back into it's-either-laugh-or-cry hysterical giggles. Is it too much to ask for my computer to fucking work?

I'm not even asking them to fix everything, for fuck's sake. If I were really good at this whole tearing-customer-service-to-shreds thing like my mother, I'm sure I'd have them not only fixing what they broke, but fixing the USB ports as well just for being enormous asshats. But I'm not. I just want it the way it was, damn it, even with the fucked-up USB ports.

*headdesk*

A case manager is supposed to call me tomorrow. Maybe I should cry now so I won't do it when I'm on the goddamn phone with them.

Comments

[paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com]

Stay calm on the phone.

You're in the right, and that's your greatest asset.

Advise them that you know very well in what condition and on what date you sent your laptop. ..and that you know the condition in which it returned was not, in fact the condition in which you sent it.

Advise them that the damage they caused predates the expiration of the warranty, so they are, in fact, responsible.

Advise them that you will remain polite but you will continue escalating until you are treated with the respect you are due as a customer who in good faith submitted your laptop to them for help.

And if all else fails, advise them you're recording the conversation, politely invoke Clark Howard, and record away.

[kitarra.livejournal.com]

Ok here's the way it's suppose to work. If you had a ticket and what ever they did during the ticket caused a problem then the ticket should not have been closed and you should be able to continue calling on that ticket until the problem is resolved. Period. Don't let them tell you otherwise.

[ardath_rekha]

Wow... I didn't have much liking for Compaq as a brand before this... but after reading what they've done to you, I will never buy a computer from them. And if telling them I said that gives you any leverage, feel free to. *HUGS!*

[spyderqueen.livejournal.com]

Summon the BBB on their ass too on top of everything else.

[paradisacorbasi.livejournal.com]

Actually, also mention that you run a blog wherein you comment on customer service you receive.

That will actually go a long way. "I run a blog" are becoming four very powerful words.

Under the heading of obvious...

[seferin.livejournal.com]

why not ask your mother to call, pretend to be you, and have her sort this out? It sounds like you are under stress, and there's no shame in asking someone better suited to choking to assist you in squeezing the customer service out their ears?

Re: Under the heading of obvious...

[ralob.livejournal.com]

agreed. mom's are awesome at bitching out customer service.

[chasethecat.livejournal.com]

Does Compaq not have a warranty on their repairs? If so, it shouldn't make any difference whether your own warranty is now expired, it should still be under the repair warranty. (Not that your warranty should make a difference anyway, since you sent your computer in for repairs before it expired, but it sounds like they're being stupid about that.)

[polydad.livejournal.com]

Having worked for 'Paq for most of '99, I suggest you buy a bazooka.

best,

Joel. Who thinks the stovepipe will have vastly less downtime.

Re: Under the heading of obvious...

[silent-sybil.livejournal.com]

Mine calls it "playing the mommy card." The mommy card is a fearsome, fearsome thing.