Hey!

[apocalypsos]

My mother was ready to toss a perfectly nice purse upstairs in the attic, but I found it in her bedroom before she could come home and put it up there. Not only that, but she left a container of perfectly good Dic-Tacs in there! Yeah, they're exactly like they sound -- Tic-Tacs shaped like little penises. (Penii? Penes? I don't know, I'm still a little buzzed.)

How cool ... a practically new purse, so that I can replace one of my old ones, and Dic-Tacs, so that I can be both morally repugnant and possessed of minty fresh breath all at once.

(P.S. Don't ask why my mom has Dic-Tacs. I don't know, and I don't really want to know. Would you?)