BURN.

Spotted on Not Always Right:

(Note: I’m waiting to board a delayed flight with one of Europe’s cheapest and largest airlines.)

Hostess: “Welcome to flight *** from Malmoe to Dublin. Those of you with seating numbers 1 through 35, please go to line one. Those of you with seating numbers 36 and up, please go to line two. If any of you are traveling with small children or checked in online, please go to the counter and you will be let on board before we start boarding the other passengers.”

(A group of businessmen, about 35-55 years old and in suits, walk to the counter and cut in front of a family with very young children.)

Hostess: “Well, I can see you didn’t check in online, so you’ll have to stand in line. The first line is for early seating numbers; the second line is for la–”

Businessman #1: “Oh, come on… can’t you make an exception? We’re already standing here and all.”

Businessman #2: “You only have to board us and we’re done!”

Hostess: “No, you’ll have to wait in turn, just like everyone else. The lines start over there.”

Businessman #2: “But I always get to board the plane first!”

Hostess: “You’re not a family with children and you didn’t check in over the internet, so you’ll have to stand in line.”

Businessman #2: *very angrily* “DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!”

Hostess: “No, but you can’t be that important if you’re traveling with us.”

Businessman #2: *quietly retreats to the back of the line with his buddies*

Say what you will about Coldplay ...

... but this is really cool. (You might remember this school choir doing "Eye Of The Tiger", too.)

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Boosted from mysteri: List the top ten things you want, right now at this very moment. Silly, serious, insane, it doesn't matter.

1. Pepsi and a bag of Cheetos.
2. To not get another headache before I go to bed.
3. For the roll I'm on right now in Heroine Addiction not to sputter out.
4. A million dollars. (Actually, I'd just be happy with five hundred bucks at this point.)
5. A bulldog puppy. (My parents' neighbor brought over her bulldog today. He was both adorable AND a vicious taunt. Waaaaaant.)
6. To be able to go shopping on Etsy without worrying how much I have to spend.
7. A job would be nice.
8. For the ten pounds I'm trying to lose to go away without my lazy ass having to work for it.
9. Superpowers.
10. Misha, Jensen, Jared, JDM. Pick one or more of them and throw them naked and willing into my bedroom.

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THE TESTIMONIALS OF AWESOME MEME! // ME!!