It's either this or stare at a wall.
Sep. 12th, 2007 02:21 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsosThings I cannot for the life of me understand, no matter how hard I try:
-- Why I want to smack Sarah Silverman so goddamn hard.
-- What makes Dane Cook so much funnier than any other random comedian.
-- Why hot actresses think Dane Cook is fuckable.
-- What was so special about Seinfeld.
-- What I was supposed to find remotely appealing or identifiable about any of the women on Sex and the City.
-- Why no one thinks Christian music is as funny as I think it is. (Have I ever mentioned how much I love reading the thank-yous in the books for the Christian CDs at work? "I'd like to thank Jesus, who's made out of light and goodness and cupcakes and cream cheese frosting and glitter, who touches me in all the naughty places because he's totally allowed to do that, who made me a better person out of glue and Popsicle sticks and named him Bob, who makes me breakfast and cuts the crusts of my sandwiches and pats me on the head and gives me ten dollars for every A I get on my midterms, who washes my underwear and makes my bed and taught me how to juggle. This one day we went to the movies and you bought me popcorn and Milk Duds, and when some guy's phone rang in the middle of the movie you waved your hand and it exploded. You are great and glorious and I totally friended you on MySpace! Oh, and also thanks to my mom, dad, wife, kids, agent, and bandmates. You did some stuff, too. I think.")
-- Why Nickelback is the anti-Christ rather than just an amusingly crappy band.
-- How Britney Spears was supposedly so terribly out of shape at the VMAs when every picture I've seen of her looks pretty good for a woman who's had two kids in as many years. (With the notable exception of the shitty extensions. Maybe it's just me who wants her to rock the short hair, listen to a lot of Joan Jett music and kick a little ass, but then again I want her to stop making Federline look like a good parent and that doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon either.)
-- The appeal of Two and a Half Men.
-- Why people keep insisting that my all-encompassing hatred of what Lost has become will fade away if I start watching again. (Uh, yeah. Not so much. By now, my hatred is a entity in its own right. Its name is Oscar. It rents the guest room.)
-- Why some idiot on the Manolo blog thinks that the Glamour cover I linked to before is not photoshopped, America Ferrera's hair is just big. (... WHAT.)
Don't mind me. I'm having a venting moment. :)
-- Why I want to smack Sarah Silverman so goddamn hard.
-- What makes Dane Cook so much funnier than any other random comedian.
-- Why hot actresses think Dane Cook is fuckable.
-- What was so special about Seinfeld.
-- What I was supposed to find remotely appealing or identifiable about any of the women on Sex and the City.
-- Why no one thinks Christian music is as funny as I think it is. (Have I ever mentioned how much I love reading the thank-yous in the books for the Christian CDs at work? "I'd like to thank Jesus, who's made out of light and goodness and cupcakes and cream cheese frosting and glitter, who touches me in all the naughty places because he's totally allowed to do that, who made me a better person out of glue and Popsicle sticks and named him Bob, who makes me breakfast and cuts the crusts of my sandwiches and pats me on the head and gives me ten dollars for every A I get on my midterms, who washes my underwear and makes my bed and taught me how to juggle. This one day we went to the movies and you bought me popcorn and Milk Duds, and when some guy's phone rang in the middle of the movie you waved your hand and it exploded. You are great and glorious and I totally friended you on MySpace! Oh, and also thanks to my mom, dad, wife, kids, agent, and bandmates. You did some stuff, too. I think.")
-- Why Nickelback is the anti-Christ rather than just an amusingly crappy band.
-- How Britney Spears was supposedly so terribly out of shape at the VMAs when every picture I've seen of her looks pretty good for a woman who's had two kids in as many years. (With the notable exception of the shitty extensions. Maybe it's just me who wants her to rock the short hair, listen to a lot of Joan Jett music and kick a little ass, but then again I want her to stop making Federline look like a good parent and that doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon either.)
-- The appeal of Two and a Half Men.
-- Why people keep insisting that my all-encompassing hatred of what Lost has become will fade away if I start watching again. (Uh, yeah. Not so much. By now, my hatred is a entity in its own right. Its name is Oscar. It rents the guest room.)
-- Why some idiot on the Manolo blog thinks that the Glamour cover I linked to before is not photoshopped, America Ferrera's hair is just big. (... WHAT.)
Don't mind me. I'm having a venting moment. :)
