(no subject)

[apocalypsos]

Just so you know, after five minutes of searching Google for the most recent news I could muster, I learned that it is obscene but not illegal to engage in carnal acts with an animal in Ohio. Just so you know what they WILL allow in Ohio before you click the link.

EDIT: Okay, you know what? I have the following to say regarding this BS.

My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiance. Britney Spears. Who Wants to Marry A Multi-Millionaire? People who have their dogs marry. Elizabeth Taylor. Las Vegas. Dennis Rodman and Carmen Electra. Anyone who thinks the dresses on this site are lovely. The Bachelorette wedding. People who get hitched underwater/while skydiving/during Metallica concerts. The fact that Michael Jackson was ever issued a marriage license when he looks more like a white woman than a black man.

Okay, I'm done.

For now.

*seethes*

Comments

[akacat]

But remember, it's not legal for a guy to marry the cow he's boffing.

[musyc]

Ack. Suddenly ashamed of my home state. Wish I still lived there so I could go protest this.

[azurelunatic]

I've been at two non-human weddings. First, for my sister's hen and her rooster, for whom it was a mere formality and an excuse to be made much of and fed cornbread. (The hen was gorgeous in a white-and-cream gown that complemented her brown and gold feathers.) Then there was the duck wedding -- I can't remember whether that was before or after the ducklings showed up.

My father officiated. Our kid-logic was that if people got married because they loved each other and were living together and were having babies and hopping-on-top, then birds should be able to have a party for that as well.

[azurelunatic]

I think the rooster's vows included crowing, calling her over to eat delicious stuff and not eating all of it himself, and doing his best to protect her and the flock.

On further thought, I think the ducks' situation really warranted a divorce, because Dabble was a neglectful mother and the babies had to be taken in by their neighbors, and Tad was abusive to the children -- he tried to molest his daughters and would beat his sons, and also stalked the neighbor lady (a very large and dignified goose, the one who was raising the ducklings because she and her mate couldn't have any more children) and tried to rape the other neighbor lady (the round brown hen from the chicken wedding).

[acetal.livejournal.com]

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