The stupid, it BURNS.

[apocalypsos]

These are all supposedly real quotes from Christian fundamentalists forums.

I'm impressed. I couldn't have delivered those with a straight face.

Comments

[shinga.livejournal.com]

OMG lmao D: "there are two gay men in there! fucking!"

[mercymydarling.livejournal.com]

...ow. I mean... ow.

[valerie]

*shakes head* My tongue hurts from biting on it.

I do, though, have to break out one of the best quotes of all time, courtesy of elysesewell: "Just because I'm an atheist doesn't mean I don't have ethic. Or morals!"

[apiphile.livejournal.com]

Oh my lack of God. The face I pulled at that last bit is not possible to describe in text alone.

[elecktrik.livejournal.com]

oh man, i really needed that laugh!!

[wal-lace.livejournal.com]

... In their defence, can I just ask a quick question -- if it was allowed, would you have gay men fucking for your entertainment?

(If the answer is yes, you're going to hell. I'd ask you to save me a seat, but I think the lesbian-watchers get a different section)

The "if I didn't believe in God, I'd be a serial killer" argument never stops being funny, of course.

[laurelin-kit.livejournal.com]

Actually, that argument terrifies me. People who only do good because of the fear of consequences are very dangerous.

[wal-lace.livejournal.com]

Yeah, but so far as I can see they only think* they're like that. They're told morality is divinely ordained, so they assume people are incapable of making moral decisions on their own behalf. They are, of course, wrong.

* For a given value of "think".

[loony-moony.livejournal.com]

Wow. That's an amazing pile of stupid right there. I'm beginning the think Bill Maher had the right idea about Christian fundamentalists.

Also, the dude in the skullcap is phenomenal. He needs to be in something I can watch on a regular basis.

[katu.livejournal.com]

I love creationists, and I wish I could be one.

I MEAN, HOW COOL WOULD IT BE TO REALLY BELIEVE WE LIVED WITH DINOSAURS? ULTRA COOL? OR ULTRA MEGA COOL?!

[metron-ariston.livejournal.com]

Don't you know that dinosaurs never really lived? God put those bones there to weed out who really believes in him from the Hell-bound evolutionists who say they're millions of years old!

[myniamh.livejournal.com]

No it was the Devil. He put them there to drag innocent children taught in schools from the right path.

[apetslife.livejournal.com]

"I wanted to watch the gay men!"

Now there's a woman after my own heart.

HAH!

(as a Christian myself, do you have any idea how hard I *HEADDESK* at stuff like this? AAARGH!!!! THE STUPID IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE!!!)

[cacahuate.livejournal.com]

OMG, some of those actually surprised me. FTW!

[xzombiexkittenx.livejournal.com]

o__0 wut? Logic: ur doin it wrong.

See, the reason I don't go on a murdering rampage in the streets is because I'm a dirty agnostic, which sort of leaves me dithering. Do I murder, do I not murder? Shit, I mean, I don't know what I believe. Maybe if I only kill people the Christians don't like that'll sort it out.

So then I murdered a bunch of gays, which was totally cool. Then I remembered that as an almost atheist I'm supposed to be pro-gay, like the liberal media tells me. So then I got all confused again.

No, shit, wait. That didn't happen. Because I'm sane.

[beanarie.livejournal.com]

I'd like to know which atheist font of knowledge includes the bit about pot not being addictive. Does God hate weed? I don't remember anyone telling me that.

[dargie.livejournal.com]

I stole this for Facebook along with your subject line because, y'know, you pretty much nailed it. Black hoods. Bwhahahaha

[conuly]

I'm laughing and crying at the same time.

[foenix.livejournal.com]

Damnit, if atheists are such horndogs and rutting all the time, how come I can't get any??

It's not fair, I tells ya!

[ficangel.livejournal.com]

These are some brilliant actors. Also. I would love to have a husband who doesn't mind me watching gay men fucking.

[myniamh.livejournal.com]

I love how happy the Atheist family were. XD

[rashaka.livejournal.com]

I am torn between LOLing at the stuff in the video, wondering why they think all atheists are male, and BOGGLING AT THE GUY IN THE HAT WHO LOOKS LIKE THIS GUY I WAS IN AMERICORPS WITH AND WHOM I HAVE SEEN IN NOTHING BUT UNDERWEAR SEVERAL TIMES. He was an atheist too.

I don't think it's him, because his voice is different, but the guy was only 20 when I knew him, and voices change, and omg tell me this wasn't filmed on a PA campus because I'm afraid my brain my break.

[rashaka.livejournal.com]

Upon seeing another video from their user channel, I have determined that it is not the same guy--this one is balding, and doesn't have the truly fantastic waist, though they are both small dudes. Also, these guys are Canadian, not Pennsylvanian. Still, the resemblance is remarkable. Even their speech cadence was similar.

[brigidsblest.livejournal.com]

*sprains a couple of ribs, laughing*

[mylenn.livejournal.com]

This was fucking hilarious. My roommate came in wanting to know why I sounded like a drunken hyena. Although, I would like to watch two guys fucking. If only for research purposes! :)