(no subject)

Well, it's nice to see that I'm not the only one who despises this unholy of unholy days. Maybe it's because I'm gullible on Olympic levels, I don't know.

Everybody else is threatening violence for pranks. I, however, am threatening wish fulfillment. You want to tell me you're pregnant? I'll show you what I learned from that book my mom got me for Christmas, "How To Win Friends and Magically Inseminate the Unsuspecting." Want to tell me you're not feeling well and you think your appendix has burst? Finally, a reason to use all that knowledge I gleaned from "ER" reruns! Heard a rumor the President's been assassinated? Give me twenty minutes, cab fare and a two-by-four and I'll go check.

So, yeah. My hatred of April Fool's Day knows no bounds.

Consider this post a virtual wishing well.

I've seen posts requesting to know who you love, who you hate, what you want written, what pretty picture you'd like for an icon, etc. So now, on a day full of humiliation and annoyances, let's do something to make you feel a little better.

Make a wish.

Go on, wish for anything.

Do it like any wish you ask for will be granted.

Go ahead. Wish away.

(no subject)

I know there's something seriously wrong with me because today I was bored out of my skull at work and found myself wondering if Navin Johnson ever wrote fanfiction based on the phone book.

Everybody who gets that joke can share my paste with me. I've decided it tastes best on Tostitos.

EDIT: Today, Bosslady told me I reminded her of Michelle from the first American Pie. Somehow, while my brain tried to decide whether or not that was a compliment, I managed not to blurt out, "Um, I played the clarinet."

Considering where that imagery could have led the conversation, I think I deserve a medal.

Casual and rather random thought while perusing ye olde friends list ...

You know, they're right. God didn't make Adam and Steve, He made Adam and Eve.

Of course, then they made Cain and Abel, so maybe He just wanted some incest in His gay porn.

Okay, see now I'm just trying to be smited. (Smote? Smoted? Whatever.)