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I just started writing a story that ... well, I'm pretty sure my muses put my favorite fandoms in a blender and pressed "puree". Sheesh. Plus, there's an apocalypse.

If this works, it's going to be seriously fucked-up. Yay! :)

EDIT: I just realized something really, really funny about my apocalypse. And no, I can't tell you what. ;P *goes back to giggling*

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Is it October yet? Because all of the good DVDs come out in October, damn it.

Except for this, which comes out the day before my birthday. Well, I know what I'm getting. :)

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On the one hand, I really, really like this new story, I have Chapter One done, and I want to share it with everybody.

On the other hand, I can already tell it's going to be long, I have two other writing projects to work on, I'm notorious for not finishing WIPs anytime soon, and I want to finish this in its entirety before I post it.

Umm. Back to that first hand, where everything's candy and flowers and apocalypses and already five different fandoms that I can think of. Can I just stay home today and work on this story? *begs*

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You know, maybe I'll get lucky tomorrow, and I'll go into work, and for the first time in a week, Bosslady will not dress me down for doing anything wrong. It's like she only got to yell at me a handful of times since I started working there a year ago (ACK! A whole year already?!), and she's using up the rest of her yelling quota before she leaves work next week. (ACK! Next week already?!)

Of course, you realize that once she leaves, I have to stop being Primo Slacker #1 and start acting like Responsible Attempted Deliveries Coordinator, and I'm not sure I can do that. For example, today I had to deal with a customer service rep who was going between Dell (the shipper) and DHL playing that game you do with your parents when you're a kid and you want to do something and you keep getting "Ask your mother" or "Ask your father". So you keep going back and forth between the two until you finally go to the weaker link and tell them the other one said it was okay, and usually, you end up getting the ice cream or the pony ride before you get your butt spanked for lying.

In summation ... um, I don't think the Responsible Attempted Deliveries Coordinator story was supposed to end with an unconscious customer service rep and me standing over him with a baseball bat with my chest heaving from overexertion and the cops surrounding me with guns blazing. And yet, there it is. *hides the body*

Oh, and for those of you who don't have access to the funny that is Don & Mike, today they interviewed a guy who said he talks to Jesus and Jesus said he wants President Bush to win the presidential election. In fact, according to this guy, he and/or his wife also spoke with John Lennon, JFK, FDR, Elvis, and Abbott & Costello, and they all want us to vote for Bush, too, because if we don't and John Kerry becomes the president, everything will die. No, seriously, everything will die, even cockroaches and Dick Clark. And in one hundred years, all that will be left of the planet will be a big ball of mud. The upside, though, is that we'll make a nice profit from the stuff and when Jayne Cobb shows up, we can sing him folk songs and worship his hat collection.

In any event, remember, folks, this is President Bush's constituency. Afraid yet? (Okay, okay, it's not all of his constituency. But it's definitely the most amusing one. :))

Also, they interviewed people standing in line in DC to audition for "American Idol". That was the second time today I was terrified for the future of humanity, right after the Jesus guy.

I'm sorry, but I don't really think Jesus gives a shit about the presidential elections. Quite frankly, I have an easier time believing he's going to spend this Election Day going on a Skee-Ball sabbatical with his dad. Hey, it's a really adorable mental image, isn't it? Bud Cort!God and Jesus, walking hand in hand down the boardwalk, God holding the kid's balloons and Jesus trying to eat his cotton candy without getting any in his hair. It's so sweet and so incredibly fucking blasphemous all at the same time.

...

Hey, it was only the one strawberry daquiri, I swear.

EDIT: Why didn't anybody tell me about apocalypse_latr?! All of you are fired. Or at least, glared at in a frustratingly cute manner.

SLEEKLY MUSCLED BOYTOY OF EDIT: After much consideration of hot Olympics photos, I would like to borrow either Ian Thorpe or the Hamm boys when no one else is using them. ("If" is not a consideration, because if this were a real offer, everyone would be using them.) I can't possibly decide between them, though. For one thing, Ian Thorpe has an accent. Then you have the Hamms. There are two of them and they're both my size. I shall have to ponder this further.