Dear Santa,
Today the bonuses at work are supposed to be available in the office. There are three options here for me:
a.) I get nothing.
b.) I get the same small bonus I got before.
c.) I get the big fat bonus.
I was really hoping you could pull some strings and make sure I get the big bonus. I mean, I need to get one -- I'm just that broke -- but I'm asking you really, really nicely if you'd be so kind as to see what you can do to help me get that big fat bonus, so I can pay my bills and put aside money for Wincon and maybe actually buy myself something other than groceries for a change.
Sincerely,
Me
P.S. If the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny aren't busy doing anything right now, maybe you could ask them for help? Please? *bats eyelashes*