(no subject)

[apocalypsos]

Dear dumbass customers,

I realize that I am wearing a T-shirt that says "Bites when provoked," but the next one of you who inquires how much you'd have to provoke me to get me to really bite you gets fed to zombies. Yes, zombies. I have a spare member of the walking dead in my office, and I'm not afraid to use him.

Sincerely,

Me

********

Dear Bill O'Reilly,

You know, if this were junior high and there was still that rule about how when you pick on someone or call them names or talk about them all the time, you have a crush on them, then I would totally believe you want to make dirty phone calls to Howard Dean. Dude, he did not kill a bunch of orphans or beat up a nun or play pinball with Satan. Chill.

Sincerely,

Me

********

Also, Oh-Woe-Is-Me-Ooooo had me take over the front counter so she could take a walk. Yeah, you heard that right. Man, I wish I could just grab somebody else in the office and have them take over my job so I could take a friggin' walk. *growls*

Comments

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

You know I think I'd like Dean so much more if he had played pinball with Satan.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

O'Reilly keeps talking about the guy like he's the epitome of all evil or something. Then again, this is the same guy who thinks his boycott of France is actually still working. *eye roll*

[vivian-shaw.livejournal.com]

*snrk* How exactly does one boycott France? By using deodorant and not looking effortlessly sexy?

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Probably by not buying french fries or French toast or French vanilla ice cream or something. ;)

[vivian-shaw.livejournal.com]

Ah, yes. Because all those things are French. *snrk*

Bill O'Reilly is one of those people who cross the "annoying" line and go straight to "woodchipper material" without pausing in the intervening territory.

[rustybitch.livejournal.com]

Don't know shit about that other stuff, I just loooove the ICON.

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

My mom was all for the boycott until she decided she wanted Brie.

Nothing wrong with playing pinball with Satan. After all most of the truly intesting people will be in hell. (Or so says Dante)

[hereticorp.livejournal.com]

It's tempting to go to your DHL office and ask about that just to see the Zombies.

hmmm . . .

[tree220.livejournal.com]

I guess by using that reasoning then you must have a really big crush on Bill O'Reilly. *eg*

Re: hmmm . . .

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Bite your tongue, lady. I know where you live. ;P

Re: hmmm . . .

[tree220.livejournal.com]

isn't denial another big sign that you really really like someone?

[lincolnkw.livejournal.com]

speaking of zombies....

allthingszombie.com

[gruyere.livejournal.com]

I would so play pinball with Satan. Especially Star Trek: The Next Generation, and really especially if I can get Charlie Daniels to write a song about it.