Random thoughts!
Sep. 17th, 2003 12:55 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsosI've spent the last half hour staring at my computer screen trying to come up with a fanfic in any of my usual fandoms (Buffy, HL, Angel, X-Men, and newbie Jake 2.0) to go with the title "An Unbearable Lightness of Brain Cells".
And I can't. Which sucks, because I'm having serious weirdo love for that title. Don't even ask me why.
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I'm going to have a job and a hurricane both at the same time. I get the impression from other people who've had hurricanes and jobs both at the same time that this is a bad thing.
You'll have to forgive me. I'm originally from Pennsylvania, so I'm pretty much disaster-deprived. Well, unless you count snowstorms, which I don't. You remember that screaming kid from "Men in Tights", right? When the local news announces more than six inches of snow, they'd let that kid loose, and he'd run down my street screaming and flailing his arms about. You know, as sort of a signal that it was okay to begin panicking like an imbecile.
You know what's funny? Going down to the Wal-Mart before a big storm and watching the rubes stock up on snow shovels and plows like they expire after every storm. And why does everybody buy milk, eggs, and bread before a storm? Great, now you can eat French toast for a week. You must be so pleased. Sheesh.
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Does anybody else find something weird that the difference between the way Britney Spears spells her first name and the way it's commonly spelled is that her version is missing a T and an A?
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Am I the only person who tries to imagine what it'd be like if the rock stars and actors Queen Elizabeth's knighted all had to act like medieval knights? I usually die laughing right about the time Elton John tries to put on that helmet-y thing over his glasses.
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My brother and I were once riding along in my car with the radio off when he turned to me and asked, "Do you hear music?" I didn't have the heart to tell him the voices in his head started a band.
********
I can't even remember why I wrote these. Quite possibly, it was because of the crack, but really, who checks these things?
Snow White, a local housekeeper, was charged today with kidnapping seven small boys and using them as slave labor. Apparently, Miss White brainwashed the boys into believing they were diamond-mining dwarfs, and had already gotten the children to dig the foundation for her home, an inground swimming pool, and their own mass grave.
This morning, the infamous child killer known only as "The Red Hood" was convicted of beating to death her grandmother's lover. The defense argued that the girl had simply made a horrible mistake when she beat the man to death with her picnic basket, as she had seen the man eating her grandmother and simply misconstrued the situation.
Two local delinquents, Hansel and Gretel Jones, have turned themselves in on charges that they left a trail of pebbles behind them when they were abandoned by their father in the woods. In response, a distraught Fred and Wilma Flintstone have decided on a closed casket.
And in other news, a con artist known simply as the Wolf was arrested today on the accusations of three brothers living in substandard living conditions outside of town. The three pigs have accused the Wolf of going door-to-door and giving unwanted blow jobs.
And I can't. Which sucks, because I'm having serious weirdo love for that title. Don't even ask me why.
********
I'm going to have a job and a hurricane both at the same time. I get the impression from other people who've had hurricanes and jobs both at the same time that this is a bad thing.
You'll have to forgive me. I'm originally from Pennsylvania, so I'm pretty much disaster-deprived. Well, unless you count snowstorms, which I don't. You remember that screaming kid from "Men in Tights", right? When the local news announces more than six inches of snow, they'd let that kid loose, and he'd run down my street screaming and flailing his arms about. You know, as sort of a signal that it was okay to begin panicking like an imbecile.
You know what's funny? Going down to the Wal-Mart before a big storm and watching the rubes stock up on snow shovels and plows like they expire after every storm. And why does everybody buy milk, eggs, and bread before a storm? Great, now you can eat French toast for a week. You must be so pleased. Sheesh.
********
Does anybody else find something weird that the difference between the way Britney Spears spells her first name and the way it's commonly spelled is that her version is missing a T and an A?
********
Am I the only person who tries to imagine what it'd be like if the rock stars and actors Queen Elizabeth's knighted all had to act like medieval knights? I usually die laughing right about the time Elton John tries to put on that helmet-y thing over his glasses.
********
My brother and I were once riding along in my car with the radio off when he turned to me and asked, "Do you hear music?" I didn't have the heart to tell him the voices in his head started a band.
********
I can't even remember why I wrote these. Quite possibly, it was because of the crack, but really, who checks these things?
Snow White, a local housekeeper, was charged today with kidnapping seven small boys and using them as slave labor. Apparently, Miss White brainwashed the boys into believing they were diamond-mining dwarfs, and had already gotten the children to dig the foundation for her home, an inground swimming pool, and their own mass grave.
This morning, the infamous child killer known only as "The Red Hood" was convicted of beating to death her grandmother's lover. The defense argued that the girl had simply made a horrible mistake when she beat the man to death with her picnic basket, as she had seen the man eating her grandmother and simply misconstrued the situation.
Two local delinquents, Hansel and Gretel Jones, have turned themselves in on charges that they left a trail of pebbles behind them when they were abandoned by their father in the woods. In response, a distraught Fred and Wilma Flintstone have decided on a closed casket.
And in other news, a con artist known simply as the Wolf was arrested today on the accusations of three brothers living in substandard living conditions outside of town. The three pigs have accused the Wolf of going door-to-door and giving unwanted blow jobs.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Re: Britney
Date: 2003-09-16 10:36 pm (UTC)And An Unbearable Lightness of Brain Cells screams Harmony 'fic to me...
no subject
Date: 2003-09-16 11:23 pm (UTC)Mind if I friend you?
no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 06:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 11:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-16 11:25 pm (UTC)You are in a fandom with Richie Ryan, and you cannot think of a use for that title? You're a disgrace. ;P You could talk about how light his head was after it was severed from his body, and how this explained so much.
And why does everybody buy milk, eggs, and bread before a storm?
Well, the last things that could possibly go bad if power went and you had no fridge are milk and eggs, obviously.
Your story reminds me of why I loved the original Grimm's versions so much when I was growing up. Though admittedly, I don't remember there being any blowjobs... ;)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 06:15 am (UTC)Aw, I like Richie too much to do that to him. Yeah, I know he's a dope, but he's a cute dope. :)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 11:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 10:26 pm (UTC)If it were a snowstorm (which she'd mentioned at some point up there), they could just put it outside to keep it cold. Of course, during a hurricane it wouldn't work that way...
no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 11:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 12:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 03:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 03:11 am (UTC)And what happens when nasty weather usually hits?
POWER OUTAGES.
I so want to spork the stupid
no subject
Date: 2003-09-17 03:54 am (UTC)It's not often that I can type "rotflmao" and mean it... but in this case? Even my cat thinks I'm insane.
Too Funny
Date: 2003-09-17 05:17 am (UTC)And as for the storm, I'm sure it'll be okay. Down here in NC is where the most damage will occur, so we're all manically watching the Weather channel for every inch of movement. Ahh, hurricane season.
Re: Too Funny
Date: 2003-09-17 10:44 am (UTC)