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Feb. 4th, 2006 10:46 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsosWell, I finally have seen this week's Project Runway. I've already been spoiled rotten for pretty much everything, but obviously there's a difference between hearing about it and watching it.
OH MY GOD THEY'RE FUCKING SLASHING THEMSELVES.
Which I'd already heard about, but HOLY CHRISTMAS.
Meanwhile, oh, maaaaaaaan. They broke up my love shack! What will 35D do without Andrae?! There won't be anyone to be melodramatic and spastic! (And I say that lovingly, of course.)
Before I forget, the judges can blow me. Complaining about how many flowers were NOT on the dresses makes it look as if you people have never actually gone into a flower shop in your lives. Flowers are expensive, you dumbasses. That's why normal people don't buy bouquets of them all the damn time. A hundred bucks does not get you enough flowers for an entire dress -- hell, I think this episode makes it obvious that it almost doesn't get you enough greenery for an entire dress, for crying out loud. BAH. Asshats.
And then there's Santino, who as long as he can keep his big mouth from saying anything insulting about anyone else is perfectly fine. (Okay, maybe not perfectly, but still.) I can accept the ego if only because you kind of HAVE to have an ego to a.) make it onto a reality show and b.) manage to perform on a show like this for as long as he has. Granted, we don't all want to hear it, but whatever. It says a lot about Santino, I think, that Nick, Daniel, and Andrae lived with him for that long and didn't throttle him in his sleep.
But what I was getting to -- the Tim Gunn impression is the BEST THING EVER. Really. Especially the Red Lobster "fanfic". Oh, my GOD. Is it bad that I feel better about the story making it onto his website? I mean, I'm still pissed at whoever was ass enough to put it up there, but at least I'm less afraid now that he was angry over it and have a little more faith that he might have been amused.
Daniel ... I just ... oh, Daniel. The story about coming out to his parents and his pretty dress and his "Tim Gunn" requests. I want a Daniel. I think we should both enter into a neocon-approved sham of a marriage for the sake of the children (I'll find some somewhere) so that he can design dresses for me and I can bake him cheesecake.
And as for the dresses themselves ...
Daniel -- I said I loved it, and I did. I loved it sooooo much. The flowers were a gorgeous touch and a beautiful shade. I think it's hysterical now that when the show first started, I was like, "Daniel ... meh," and now I'm like, "If Daniel does not win, I shall have an apoplexy and need to be committed to an asylum where I shall die beautifully of the consumption!" Because damn it, if I'm going to be overly melodramatic over the outcome of a reality show, I'm going to commit.
Chloe -- I thought Chloe's was adorable. I wasn't too thrilled by Grace's skullcap, but it wasn't an awful touch. Plus, Chloe's attitude is always nice.
Santino -- Okay, call me crazy, but I really did like his dress and I thought the shellac was a nice touch if only because it seemed as if he was thinking about Austin's cornhusk dress and wanted his dress to hold up. So at least that line of thought was practical. And as wearable art, it was lovely, but the judges are right. Santino has a horrible habit of thinking about the design but not the woman in it. He completely disregards waistlines, he overdesigns, and his addiction to trims is stifling sometimes. But it's like I said with the whole metaphor of that sequence in some movies where a woman has to wear some horrible dress for some occasion and finally gets annoyed enough to tear some extras off the dress and it ends up looking really cute after that. That's what Santino needs to strive for. Well, that, and keeping his mouth shut sometimes.
Kara -- Well, I disliked Kara's dress, but then again that's mostly because I dislike Kara. What the hell is it with her, anyway? Oh, right, I remember. I don't completely trust a designer who never looks good at all. At least Andrae makes up for the tacky short shorts by looking pretty good for the runway shows. (Honestly, when he's not making his OMGWTFWOW! face, he's really kind of cute.) But Kara has that horrible hair that desperately needs about a dozen hot oil treatments and she always has it pulled back in a scrunchy (which stopped being the least bit cool when I was in ninth grade, I think), and it drives me batty. Seriously, I can't wait until next week, if only because I'm sincerely hoping whoever gets her sends her to the stylist and slips the guy a fifty to lop it all off into something vaguely becoming. And don't even get me started on her clothes. Just ... God..
Nick -- Aw, come on, I liked Nick's. I mean, yeah, the whole thing where he's got a long-winded expression for everything is getting a little old, but still. I thought it was nice the way it was, not to mention the fact that he's done wonders for Rachael. (And she's gotten a bit of color, which makes her look a hell of a lot better.)
Andrae -- Oh, poor Andrae. It wasn't awful, but it wasn't quite as good as everybody else's. And Nick was crying on the runway, and then Andrae was telling him to stop because only one designer is allowed to cry on the runway, and WHY ARE YOU BREAKING UP MY LOVE SHACK, HEIDI KLUM?!
Ahem.
Andrae left and I cried. The end.
EDIT: "Designers, watch out for Andrae. He's our little lamb." Man, if I'd heard that from him a week or two ago ... *snickers*
OH MY GOD THEY'RE FUCKING SLASHING THEMSELVES.
Which I'd already heard about, but HOLY CHRISTMAS.
Meanwhile, oh, maaaaaaaan. They broke up my love shack! What will 35D do without Andrae?! There won't be anyone to be melodramatic and spastic! (And I say that lovingly, of course.)
Before I forget, the judges can blow me. Complaining about how many flowers were NOT on the dresses makes it look as if you people have never actually gone into a flower shop in your lives. Flowers are expensive, you dumbasses. That's why normal people don't buy bouquets of them all the damn time. A hundred bucks does not get you enough flowers for an entire dress -- hell, I think this episode makes it obvious that it almost doesn't get you enough greenery for an entire dress, for crying out loud. BAH. Asshats.
And then there's Santino, who as long as he can keep his big mouth from saying anything insulting about anyone else is perfectly fine. (Okay, maybe not perfectly, but still.) I can accept the ego if only because you kind of HAVE to have an ego to a.) make it onto a reality show and b.) manage to perform on a show like this for as long as he has. Granted, we don't all want to hear it, but whatever. It says a lot about Santino, I think, that Nick, Daniel, and Andrae lived with him for that long and didn't throttle him in his sleep.
But what I was getting to -- the Tim Gunn impression is the BEST THING EVER. Really. Especially the Red Lobster "fanfic". Oh, my GOD. Is it bad that I feel better about the story making it onto his website? I mean, I'm still pissed at whoever was ass enough to put it up there, but at least I'm less afraid now that he was angry over it and have a little more faith that he might have been amused.
Daniel ... I just ... oh, Daniel. The story about coming out to his parents and his pretty dress and his "Tim Gunn" requests. I want a Daniel. I think we should both enter into a neocon-approved sham of a marriage for the sake of the children (I'll find some somewhere) so that he can design dresses for me and I can bake him cheesecake.
And as for the dresses themselves ...
Daniel -- I said I loved it, and I did. I loved it sooooo much. The flowers were a gorgeous touch and a beautiful shade. I think it's hysterical now that when the show first started, I was like, "Daniel ... meh," and now I'm like, "If Daniel does not win, I shall have an apoplexy and need to be committed to an asylum where I shall die beautifully of the consumption!" Because damn it, if I'm going to be overly melodramatic over the outcome of a reality show, I'm going to commit.
Chloe -- I thought Chloe's was adorable. I wasn't too thrilled by Grace's skullcap, but it wasn't an awful touch. Plus, Chloe's attitude is always nice.
Santino -- Okay, call me crazy, but I really did like his dress and I thought the shellac was a nice touch if only because it seemed as if he was thinking about Austin's cornhusk dress and wanted his dress to hold up. So at least that line of thought was practical. And as wearable art, it was lovely, but the judges are right. Santino has a horrible habit of thinking about the design but not the woman in it. He completely disregards waistlines, he overdesigns, and his addiction to trims is stifling sometimes. But it's like I said with the whole metaphor of that sequence in some movies where a woman has to wear some horrible dress for some occasion and finally gets annoyed enough to tear some extras off the dress and it ends up looking really cute after that. That's what Santino needs to strive for. Well, that, and keeping his mouth shut sometimes.
Kara -- Well, I disliked Kara's dress, but then again that's mostly because I dislike Kara. What the hell is it with her, anyway? Oh, right, I remember. I don't completely trust a designer who never looks good at all. At least Andrae makes up for the tacky short shorts by looking pretty good for the runway shows. (Honestly, when he's not making his OMGWTFWOW! face, he's really kind of cute.) But Kara has that horrible hair that desperately needs about a dozen hot oil treatments and she always has it pulled back in a scrunchy (which stopped being the least bit cool when I was in ninth grade, I think), and it drives me batty. Seriously, I can't wait until next week, if only because I'm sincerely hoping whoever gets her sends her to the stylist and slips the guy a fifty to lop it all off into something vaguely becoming. And don't even get me started on her clothes. Just ... God..
Nick -- Aw, come on, I liked Nick's. I mean, yeah, the whole thing where he's got a long-winded expression for everything is getting a little old, but still. I thought it was nice the way it was, not to mention the fact that he's done wonders for Rachael. (And she's gotten a bit of color, which makes her look a hell of a lot better.)
Andrae -- Oh, poor Andrae. It wasn't awful, but it wasn't quite as good as everybody else's. And Nick was crying on the runway, and then Andrae was telling him to stop because only one designer is allowed to cry on the runway, and WHY ARE YOU BREAKING UP MY LOVE SHACK, HEIDI KLUM?!
Ahem.
Andrae left and I cried. The end.
EDIT: "Designers, watch out for Andrae. He's our little lamb." Man, if I'd heard that from him a week or two ago ... *snickers*
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no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 05:03 pm (UTC)Hee!
And, erm, can I get three-way married to you two? Because I love you both a whole lot.
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Date: 2006-02-04 05:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 05:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 05:33 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 06:44 pm (UTC)THANK YOU OMG. I was yelling at the screen.
And I loved them all. I thought Andrae's did what it was meant to do, ie, Audrey Hepburn-esque french shift dress thing, and NICK CRIED. Damn.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 07:40 pm (UTC)Tim Gunn himself made a big disclaimer and booed the judges for that in his blog. He said that the biggest fear was wilting from one day to the next even with refridgeration, and that he didn't blame any of them one bit. I get the sense that he was genuinely surprised that the judges didn't think of that.
Have you seen the VIDEOS from the website? Santino doing Tim Gunn singing "I want to fuck you like an animal" is possibly the most hilarious thing evar, and Daniel ends up laughing himself onto the floor.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 08:23 pm (UTC)Oh. My. God/dess. :: dies ::
:: resurrects ::
:: dashes off to watch ::
no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 08:32 pm (UTC)...
I found his old friendster profile...LOL
no subject
Date: 2006-02-04 10:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-05 01:59 am (UTC)You thought I was kidding, didn't you? Except Santino wrote Tim/Andrae, and set it at a Red Lobster, and it was awesome. You know, if he kept doing stuff like that, I wouldn't hate him.
Kara will not make the final three. She's about the only one I can peg, at this point; everyone else is almost too evenly matched. And that's good, because while I don't hate Kara - she's not, like, *Zulema* - something about her irritates the hell out of me. And I knew Andrae wasn't going to make it, but I was still tearing up.
Oh, *Daniel*. Puppy! Adorable puppy who can design his ass off and has won four challenges so far, and he's definitely safe this week. Which means I will be watching the week after next from under my pillow, shrieking into it periodically.
(Have you seen the extra videos for this one yet? Where the TimBot 5000 malfunctions and we get to see the entire Daniel-coming-out conversation? *dies* Seriously, we can timeshare him in a sham heterosexual marriage. It can be a sham heterosexual polyamorous marriage. I'm cool with it if you are.)
no subject
Date: 2006-02-05 03:23 am (UTC)And I don't know you.
/But/ I absolutely adore PR, and in dying need of some PR slash. I have only found you in my quest for the den of sin of 35D and so am turning to you for help.
Anything, anything you can give me and I will be forever in debt.
I'll even try writing a fic in return...or something. I'm not that bad at writing, if I do say so myself(which I just did.).
And on a random side-note, I would love to read what you have, but unfortunately can't...for some reason my anti-computer-intelligence-ness can't figure out why. If that made any sense. (I'm a blonde anyway, not supposed to make sense. xP)
But yeah, that's about it. Done rambling. And just y'know, to go away now I'll kinna.. go. -shuffles off-
But pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease *whine* Anything anything, pretty please with a puppy Daniel on top. ^^
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Date: 2006-02-05 04:48 am (UTC)I don't know you, but I love you a little for pointing that out.
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Date: 2006-02-05 08:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-05 09:16 am (UTC)The sensible part of my brain knew Andrae would go, but the not-sensible part thought it was like getting rid of a mascot. A mascot that's a puppy. Awwww. And I cannot wait until they get rid of Kara. They're getting down the meat of the talent, and she just does not fit in at all.
I want to see Daniel's collection SO FREAKING MUCH. I have thoroughly convinced myself that there is no way he won't make the final three, because he's won the most challenges and the judges love him and even if his last design were a skid mark, I can't see them tossing him out for that. He'd have to fail so incredibly bad at this point NOT to make the final three, it's ridiculous. Of course, if there's some sort of horrible designing tragedy between this week and next and he does screw up that badly, I could be proven wrong, but FAITH. *crosses fingers*
(Yup, watched the extras. I think we should totally timeshare. The boy needs all the fake wives he can get, and hey, it's only fair we be part of the twenty percent. :))
no subject
Date: 2006-02-06 02:27 am (UTC)I want Daniel to win so much it's almost getting painful to watch the elimination process. Seriously, the week after next I'm going to be watching from under, like, the bed. "Oh, you like Chloe's dress! Great! SHOW ME DANIEL." And he'll get to walk the runway!
But first, the two best words in the English language: reunion show.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-06 03:58 am (UTC)With Santino, I kind of want to see what he could do with his own collection, but at the same time, I'm terrified of it. I'm seriously hoping that if he does end up in the final three, he actually comes out with a full display of the glimmers of talent he's shown, and hopefully notices he's designing for a person eventually.
With Nick, I love him to pieces and I think he could do a great job, but I'm still worried. The whole fishtail skirt thing is killing me, and when he said that thing about his models being his inspiration, I got really anxious.
If Kara makes it, I'm going to want to punch somebody. There's sneaking under the radar, and then there's this, which is just ridiculous.
Watching Daniel walk the runway may make me pregnant just from watching. It'll be that damn sexy, I know it.