Midnight snackin'
Jun. 22nd, 2003 02:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsosJust went downstairs to get a tuna fish sandwich, flipped on the TV, and was confronted with the gorgeous visage that is Alan Rickman in "Sense and Sensibility." Mmm ... tortured Regency goodness.
Kate Winslet, you idiot. You should have been chasing after him from day one. "Give me an occupation, Miss Dashwood, or I shall run mad"? Kate, you dip. No, I think I'll chase after Skank-Boy with the impressively massive Regency pompadour. Sheesh.
It should be like a rule in every movie -- it doesn't matter whether Alan Rickman's playing the bad guy or the good guy ... if he's there, jump his ass. "Robin Hood" is the perfect example. Why the hell would anyone want to fall in love with a Robin Hood who doesn't even bother to speak with a bloody British accent? Jesus, my British accent blows, too, Costner, but I'd at least try. Maybe you've taken a look at your tax return every year. For some ungodly reason I still can't understand, it says, "Actor." I have no idea why, because it's not like you ever try it out. Playing Robin Hood and not using a British accent is like being hired as a chef and saying, "Oh, I'm not planning to cook, but hey, I'm cute, so it's not like the customers will care." (Newflash, schmucko -- you're not all that cute anymore. You and James van der Beek have a head size thing. It's frightening, really. You warp the minds of small children when you put on hats. I just thought you should know.)
For Christ's sake, Costner, Alan bothered to go out and learn a British accent! (Okay, by being born in Britain, raised in Britain, living in Britain, and calling it his homeland for his entire life, but let's not nitpick here.)
Sheesh. Stupid Costner and his massive forehead. You suck.
Kate Winslet, you idiot. You should have been chasing after him from day one. "Give me an occupation, Miss Dashwood, or I shall run mad"? Kate, you dip. No, I think I'll chase after Skank-Boy with the impressively massive Regency pompadour. Sheesh.
It should be like a rule in every movie -- it doesn't matter whether Alan Rickman's playing the bad guy or the good guy ... if he's there, jump his ass. "Robin Hood" is the perfect example. Why the hell would anyone want to fall in love with a Robin Hood who doesn't even bother to speak with a bloody British accent? Jesus, my British accent blows, too, Costner, but I'd at least try. Maybe you've taken a look at your tax return every year. For some ungodly reason I still can't understand, it says, "Actor." I have no idea why, because it's not like you ever try it out. Playing Robin Hood and not using a British accent is like being hired as a chef and saying, "Oh, I'm not planning to cook, but hey, I'm cute, so it's not like the customers will care." (Newflash, schmucko -- you're not all that cute anymore. You and James van der Beek have a head size thing. It's frightening, really. You warp the minds of small children when you put on hats. I just thought you should know.)
For Christ's sake, Costner, Alan bothered to go out and learn a British accent! (Okay, by being born in Britain, raised in Britain, living in Britain, and calling it his homeland for his entire life, but let's not nitpick here.)
Sheesh. Stupid Costner and his massive forehead. You suck.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-06-22 02:21 am (UTC)Rent "An Awfully Big Adventure". You will not be disappointed.
Why aren't you renting it now? Oh, fine: Alan Rickman, sex scene. Plus a bonus Hugh Grant for good measure.
no subject
Date: 2003-06-22 06:25 am (UTC)Hee. I love guys like that. Hugh Jackman's the best. I can think of at least five different ways his name is absolutely filthy. I don't know what his parents were up to with that, but I think I love them.
I don't get Maid Marian, either. Jeez, he was so anxious to have sex with her he was willing to do her right there on the floor right in front of the priest! Come on!
Eh, he was too much man for her anyway. Let her have The Head.
"An Awfully Big Adventure"! I remember that movie! Mmm ... *user thinks back on Alan and Hugh in the same movie and promptly passes out*
no subject
Date: 2003-06-22 01:03 pm (UTC)Sometimes, when I hear the name Hugh Jackman, I still have to stop and think, "Wait? Huge what?"