Thanks! We'd love to steal your audience.

[apocalypsos]

I'm going to steal a page from a certain TWoP forum and write a letter to Shonda Rhimes expressing my feelings regarding the Grey's Anatomy finale, with the understanding that the copy I torrented stopped having audio about halfway through, which means there are a couple of scenes worth of dialogue in the middle that I missed out on.

So.

Dear Shonda,

I suppose I could keep it simple and say, "So long and thanks for all the fish," or some other aggravated dismissal, but I won't. God knows that even if you were paying attention to me you should already know that I hate the direction this show has gone in and what's been done to the characters. Not like you'd care. If hearing about your blog entries has taught me anything it's that I'm interrogating the text from the wrong perspective or whatever deluded phrase you've got for my not being able to wrap my brain around the possibility that you think life might actually be like this.

And yes, I am getting that impression from you. This isn't Scrubs -- I don't expect any of the behavior on there to make sense because it's a comedy and at times a bit slapstick, but the first few seasons managed to be filled with both humanity, real-life situations the audience could identify with, and even enough correct medical jargon to shock me.

Look, here's the thing. I just got done watching the Ugly Betty finale. Maybe you've heard of it. It comes on before your show. It grows out of telenovelas, which means it's basically a cheesy primetime soap opera. It's supposed to be silly. I don't actually have to buy what any of these people do because they're deceivingly presented to the audience as cartoons -- at first glance. By the time you watch a few episodes you suddenly realize that you came for the cheese and been sucked into a world with real people in it. Betty, Hilda, Amanda, Daniel ... I've met all of these people in real life, and with all of their faults have loved spending time with them.

I've met people like what you've spent this season turning these people into.

And I don't want to spend time with any of them.

I hate that Derek's shifted back and forth over the course of the series between the middle and high ratings on the dicksmack scale. Honest to God, I didn't even realize until a few episodes ago that Marti Noxon was writing episodes and when I did it explained SO MUCH. Nice to know she still hasn't gotten the relationship therapy she needs since Buffy went off the air.

I hate that I'm being told on a repeated basis that everybody either cheats or screws their boss/teacher. And if you don't -- if you and your significant other are happy and have a functional relationship -- you're just not interesting enough to warrant airtime.

I hate how often your female characters aren't spurred to action until they're told to by the men they're with.

I hate how many problems on this show evolve from characters who won't just SAY IT. There are actually people out there who understand the basics of how to communicate with other people. They've discovered this neat trick called "speaking." Perhaps you've heard of it.

I hate how instead of having characters make a sensible decision, plot points are made that evolve more for the drama than from any standpoint involving logic. Explain to me how a fourth-year resident who managed to get an eight-million-dollar free clinic up and running in a matter of weeks loses out on a Chief Resident position to a third-year resident who, while competent, has enough free time to stand around and give her husband and his female best friend suspicious looks all the damn time.

I hate how we're supposed to buy that George and Izzie discovered they were Meant To Be during an illicit drunken one-night-stand. I've been whacked upside the head with metal baseball bats that were more subtle than that particular plot twist. (Author's note: No, I haven't. I think. I've been hit on my head a lot in my life ... have I mentioned that?) And it's not like I wouldn't have bought it. If George and Callie had simply self-destructed, as a hasty Vegas wedding most likely would, and Izzie had spent the night comforting George, and one thing led to another ... okay, I might buy it then. If it had taken more than one argument between George and Callie for the two of them to fall into bed together, maybe. (Probably not, but maybe a little leeway.) I hate the When Harry Met Sally mentality of George and Izzie falling into bed together, that men and women can't be best friends and inevitably end up sleeping together. So far Alex has slept with Izzie, who's slept with George, who's slept with Meredith, who's slept with Derek, who's slept with Addison, who's slept with Alex, who's slept with ... you know what? I'll stop now.

I hate how it's become more and more blatantly obvious that you have absolutely no grasp on your damn timeline. It's been a year of show-time since the interns arrived in the pilot, yes? This means that it's been a matter of a few short months since Izzie lost the love of her life in a heartbreaking turn of events only to move onto the next love of her life. Everything that's happened in Derek and Meredith's relationship -- they hook up, they flirt back and forth, they get together, Addison shows up, they break up, Addison and Derek try to get back together again, Derek wants Meredith, Meredith tries to choose between Finn and Derek, Derek and Meredith sleep together at the prom, Addison finds out, she and Derek get a divorce, Meredith and Derek get together again, Meredith drowns, Meredith comes back to life, life proceeds to jump up and down on Meredith's head and steal all her toys, Derek starts competing for the World's Biggest Dickhead award, and now Derek meets and flirts with Meredith's half-sister -- all of that has happened in a YEAR. And you expect me to believe that? Seriously?!

I hate how you talk down to the audience in your blog if they don't understand or dislike your plot contrivances. Don't talk to me like I'm an idiot because I'm seeing plotlines in which you're being derivative of your own show.

I hate how no one on this show gets to be happy. Genuinely perfectly happy with everything that's going on in their life, or at least content with the state of it. I know very few people whose lives are as constantly dreadful as these people have it at all times. I know they're doctors, but come ON.

I hate how ...

Look, I just hate, okay? It hurts to watch anymore. I can't stand seeing what's been done to these people in the name of plots that feel a lot less like real drama and a lot more like you have labeled a bunch of blow-up dolls with the names of the interns and like to beat them with two-by-fours on weekends.

You and I are through. Done. I can't do this to myself anymore. I'm starting to put a permanent dent in my forehead from banging it against the desk.

On the bright side, if the forums at ABC and TWoP are any indication your audience is jumping ship next season and will be looking for something new to watch in that time slot. And have I got the show for them! See, there's these two hot brothers fighting evil with a trunkful of weapons and ...

Well, I'll make sure to give them the head's-up. Cheers!

Sincerely,

Me

P.S. You could maybe stand a little relationship therapy yourself, if McDreamy is your idea of a romantic hero.

Comments

[doortje.livejournal.com]

I have to say: I agree on every point. Which is why I stopped watching Grey's after the whole Meredith death debacle and judging from people's reactions to the rest of the season it was a wise move.

Ugly Betty is so awesome. I love Betty, I love each and every character on it. (And Ignacio is right up there with Keith Mars, Coach Taylor and Pascoe (Dalziel & Pascoe) in the awesome dads list. )

[lilacsigil.livejournal.com]

I hate how many problems on this show evolve from characters who won't just SAY IT.
This is what made me stop watching X-Files half-way through Season 9, despite watching every single episode, multiple times, up to then. I still haven't seen the last ten or so episodes. Thank you for this warning about GA!

[beanarie.livejournal.com]

I think the big difference between Ugly Betty (which made me tear up last night and I honestly never do that) and Grey's Anatomy is that Betty is populated with characters who are horrible and shallow on the outside but have hidden depths, and Grey's main characters are warm & witty on the outside and rotten & immature on the inside. And, WORD on the point about never letting people be happy. That turned me off of both Buffy and ER.

[wiliqueen.livejournal.com]

Never trust your heart to anything with Jim Parriott's name anywhere on it. Simplistic but true. {{{{ sympathy }}}}

[musesfool.livejournal.com]

Man, I stopped watching Grey's after George and Izzie slept together, not because I don't think people cheat or I don't think they would be good together (I shipped George/Izzie from the first fifteen minutes of the pilot, ferchrissakes!), but because they were mean to Callie about it, and the *show* was mean to Callie about it, and I can't watch a show that repeatedly tells me my favorite characters (Addison, Callie) are evil bitches from hell while showing me that they are probably the best of the bunch (outside of Bailey, who rules them all). Not to mention the continuing starry-eyed way the show wants us to view McDreamy, who still tops the "Should Be Eaten by Bears" list.

I deleted the unwatched eps off my DVR because I just can't stomach the idea of watching after what I've heard has happened.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Oh, man, you want to really be angry about the way they treat Callie, try reading Shonda's reason for giving Callie the Chief Resident position over Bailey. It's something like that Bailey had a good career and a shaky family life while Callie had a shaky career and a good family life or ... or ... I don't even know. I just know that not only would it be illegal if that were the reason she hadn't gotten it, it reeks of the Chief mommy-tracking Bailey once again and it SUCKS.

And the dumbest part is that there are people on the ABC forums saying, "No, it's okay, they were giving us hints of that all season long!" Just because they were giving us hints all season long that Bailey wouldn't get the position doesn't make it good, right, or logical.

[musesfool.livejournal.com]

Okay, see, if I thought the show would show that that was wrong - that the Chief *shouldn't* be mommy-tracking Bailey (since WHEN does she have a shaky family life? Um... What? no, seriously, what?) - then maybe I'd have some confidence, but this is the same show that has the Chief tell Derek he's an honorable man for going back to his wife and then yearning for another woman and calling the other woman a whore when she tries to get over him.

So I... yeah. No. I can't. We had some fun times, but I think I've got to stay broken up with the show.

[squee1123.livejournal.com]

On the bright side, if the forums at ABC and TWoP are any indication your audience is jumping ship next season and will be looking for something new to watch in that time slot. And have I got the show for them! See, there's these two hot brothers fighting evil with a trunkful of weapons and ...

Well, I'll make sure to give them the head's-up. Cheers!


Woo! I used to jsut record Grey's while I watched (and recorded) SPN in the other room. I've given up on Grey's entirely. The only time I record it is when my friend asks me to because she's busy.

I just can't really STAND any of the characters anymore. Okay, thats extreme. They have their moments but I know that if Id have been watching the past few weeks I wouldnt like them at all.

[ciara-belle.livejournal.com]

Marti Noxon has been writing episodes?!?

That explains SO MUCH.

[inimicallyyours.livejournal.com]

Um, yes. Everything you just wrote is EXACTLY what I'm feeling. Grey's and I, we broke up last night. It was great.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I just ... Shonda's blog made me want to pound her. She makes a big deal about "burning down the house" like she's all proud of kicking every single character in the head and making them impossible to sympathize with. It's ridiculous. And God forbid you disagree with her because obviously you're WRONG and STUPID.

[inimicallyyours.livejournal.com]

See, I tried to read the blog once and then had to stop, because she was pissing me off. It's like she didn't care what any of the *fans* thought.

Oh well, I hear there are other shows on Thursday.

[mellaithwen]

That's how bad it's gotten, spn is more reality based than Greys which is slowly turning into a charicature of itself. Everyone has sex with each other and at the end of they day they get annoyed and then have angry break-up sex and everyone's pissed off and alone *facepalm*

don't like dickead McDreamy at all :(

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

YES. When the soapy comedy before you and the supernatural road trip opposite you are both more realistic than your medical drama, that's saying something.

[kashmir1.livejournal.com]

Wow. You put into words everything that I've been feeling about Grey's. And why I can't watch any longer.

Mind if I link?

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Yeah, sure, go ahead. :)

[kashmir1.livejournal.com]

Awesome, thanks so much!

[strippedpink.livejournal.com]

Took the words right outta my mouth, baby. Also, I didn't watch last night but...are you telling me Bailey lost CR to CALLIE?

oh, I love Callie but that is SO FUCKED UP. No wonder everyone's reactions are so hate-filled. JESUS GA. >:(

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Someone on ye olde friends list just made a good point, that with running the clinic she wouldn't have the time to be chief resident. The problem is that if you read Shonda's blog that's not why she lost out of the job -- she basically lost out because the Chief thought she wasn't giving her family enough of her time. So, basically, more mommy-tracking. Brilliant.

[shellies.livejournal.com]

well, you said it better than i could. i was just gonna say: "well, what a load of shit."

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I think my favorite part was going over to the ABC forums and seeing something like ten people saying to Shonda, "Uh, I've been married for (however many) years and it's not actually as bad as you seem to think it is ..." HA. You tell her.

[shellies.livejournal.com]

haha! she'll just be like, oh but don't you get it? they're so flawed and human.

my friend asked me on the phone what happened in the finale and i basically said, "name every bad thing you could think of that could happen to each character on the entire show and that's what happened." seriously, what is with this season? i get that it's a dramaomg, but people can actually, you know, be happy for five minutes. seriously! it's possible! the only regular characters on the show who had ANYTHING happy happen to them were the chief (and adele had to lose her baby for it to happen and i guess callie, but i am too busy being offended that a strong, intelligent woman NEEDS A BABY RIGHT NOW to pay attention to that.

[rose-in-texas.livejournal.com]

MARTI NOXON is writing for them now? Oh, dear. So much now makes sense in a not-making-sense kind of way.

the GA finale

[julietlaw.livejournal.com]

My level of hate is not nearly as high as yours but I agree heartily with pretty much everything you said. I also second the opinion that people should start spending time with the Winchester brothers instead of the interns.

And if you're still looking for a healthy relationship in a couple may I suggest Medium which is as much about Allison & Joe and their realistic married life as it is about the investigations? Seriously, they are the best couple ever (in their 40s and still sexy as hell.) I love them so much.

[iamnotkris.livejournal.com]

-APPLAUDS-

We're only like, half-way through Season 3 here or something, and I can already see it going down the drain. Seriously. Everyone still loves it, but I'm totally giving up on it.

And I know tons of people hate it for it's time slot and stuff over there, but it's on a different day here and doesn't show at the same time as SPN. So that's not the reason I hate it.

I hate it because - it started out as a good show, you know? I used to love it. And now?

Now it's so... I don't know, incestuous, and so far-fetched, it's absolutely ridiculous. Everyone's fighting with each other, sleeping with each other, it's so conflicted. It's like, "Okay, I'll have this guy this week, and we can trade next week, okay?"

And it doesn't help that the cast aren't exactly the nicest people ever. From what I hear they're constantly fighting and arguing and - calling each other fags. God, what kind of self-respecting person does that? How can you pick the cast of GA over Jensen and Jared, for serious. Hee.

So kudos to you on not watching GA, and I really hope all their watchers jump ship to SPN, because our boys are SO. MUCH. MORE. AWESOME. xDD

[nessataleweaver.livejournal.com]

Y'know, I only started watching GA because Jeffrey Dean Morgan was in it. I stopped watching halfway through the finale when I found out he died. Partly because I was upset at the cheap-ass way they killed him off, and partly because he and Izzie were the only characters I really gave a shit about (with the possible exception of Addison), and I figured I could catch up with what's going on on twop.

I've only been by to catch the recaps once all season. Which should tell you something.

So, thank you for reassuring that all I've missed is a buttload of aggravation that I didn't need in the least.

BTW, what the fuck happened to Marti Noxon anyway? I still love her stuff from early Buffy, but once Buffy went to college, she mutated into the woman two of my best friends call Marti TOXON.