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If you ignore the wank that goes with it and just read the OP, this "Make Your Own Anita Blake Book" post is far too accurate. *giggles*

So I guess there's a writing meme where I toss together a list of the first lines of my stories and maybe that might inspire someone to write a drabble or something. And it's early and I'm bored, so what the hell? (And I'll edit out any specific references to characters so anyone can use 'em.)

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EDIT: Dear spammers,

You are the only company sending spam to my email, and it's all golf-related. I don't play golf. I don't watch golf. In fact, the only time I do anything remotely golf-related is when I'm throwing up and I make a noise that sounds vaguely like "golf" as I eject my breakfast. And considering I only do that when I get a stomach flu, I'm pretty sure I don't need an entire outfit including fancy leather gloves and spiked shoes to do it, and I certainly don't need to go to a famous golf course and use their bathroom to do it, either.

Thanks bunches,

Me

PREVIEW-PIMPING FRIEND OF EDIT: So I laughed much harder than I should have at Eulogy and Fat Albert, and think Kate Bosworth looks much too pretty to hook up with Kevin Spacey in what occasionally looks like really plastic makeup in Beyond the Sea.

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Painting of Nude Bush Removed From Museum -- I didn't want it to be what I thought it might be, and that's exactly what it turned out to be. Blech. I wouldn't click on that and see the painting if you want to keep your stomach contents intact.

Paper tycoons vie for Monopoly championship -- Dude, a Monopoly championship? Oh, I'd so enter. I'd also lose in the first round, but hey, Monopoly championship!

Boy, 11, Takes Car on Long Excursion -- Okay, how long before his parents sell the movie rights, do you think?

Monks Seek Homes for St Bernard Rescue Dogs -- I would love one of those, except for the fact that they're twice as big as I am. Plus, monks! Hee!

Resurrection of a Film Flop - 'Heaven's Gate' Redux -- I've got a wild and crazy idea. How about we re-release good movies that didn't get the recognition they deserved the first time around? (Hell, they did it with Donnie Darko and The Shawshank Redemption ... why can't we keep that up?)

Congress Tries to Push Indecency Fines Again -- Dear Congress ... fuck you. Also, learn what an "off switch" is. Sincerely, me.

Gifford Writes Book, Lyrics for Musical -- Considering the way she mangles sings, this is one of the most terrifying things I've heard all week. *shudders*

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Well, I was going to spend the entire weekend locked away in my room, writing up a storm, but it's nice out and it's sunny and in two months when it starts getting freezing cold, I'll be kicking myself for not going out to the movies or shopping or the Mall or something on a day like this.

I think I'll go see Shaun of the Dead again, then head up to Union Station to get a card for John's widow and buy a Powerball ticket. (And I will, of course, be lugging along my AlphaSmart, so I can at least get some writing done on the Metro and at the movies. :))

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Another one to add to the list of Things I Didn't Mean To Somehow Cause When I Started dead_earth -- Strongest typhoon in decade strikes Tokyo

Anybody have any requests for the next weird meteorological or geological event? I think I can pull off a rain of toads, but it might take a hell of a lot of concentrating, and possibly something hallucenogenic.

EDIT: The hometown newspaper of George W. Bush, which endorsed Kerry this election year, has received threats of physical brutality against the people working there from people angry with the endorsement. You know, this really pisses me off, because it's just another display of the callous, self-righteous behavior of a select few who are just making this election year worse by acting like absolute assholes, in a "Stop being on my side, asshat!" kind of way. And the jerks who issue death threats over a newpaper's political endorsement are just as bad as the morons who tore up that one little girl's Bush/Cheney sign. Being an asshole is not a condition that only affects the Republicans or the Democrats, or anybody else for that matter.

Jesus, how hard is it to just not agree with someone on political views without going to extremes like this? Sheesh.

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I went looking for Dom pictures for a little inspiration and found ( this. )

Erm, excuse me.

*pounces on Dom, shags like crazy*

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I just spent the last six straight hours working on The Monsters of Minooka and prepping myself for major chapter-finishing tomorrow, and I seriously have to get away from the computer before my eyeballs explode. (Mostly, it involved writing lots and lots and LOTS of dialogue.) I have a month to get this sucker finished for the most part so that at least I have something to work with when NaNoWriMo comes and I have to work on The Walking Dead of Wilkes-Barre. And I want to finish both of them by the end of the year, because I'm just that big a glutton for punishment.

Heh. You know things are bad when Warren Ellis asks why he shouldn't kill you, and you tell him your writing schedule for the next two and a half months will probably do the job easily enough, and then you actually tell him what said schedule entails and he responds with the Internet equivalent of looking at you like you have lobsters crawling out of your ears.