Writer's Block: Memo to Myself

[apocalypsos]

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Oh, good Lord. *headdesk*

This is such a long list:

1. Look, I know you think you're some hideous troll creature who should be living under a bridge somewhere, but you're not. Really, you're not. You just need to dial back your wardrobe choices a tad, stop borrowing clothes from Mom -- she has very nice clothes, but she's your MOM and they don't work on you -- and for God's sake, just go to a different hairstylist and tell her you want it ridiculously short. And then dye it dark brown or dark red. (I'd suggest a bob but I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be able to handle it.) And if anybody at school gives you the stink-eye like they're thinking that you got your hair cut like that because you're a lesbian, or better yet asks straight out (because they're already dropping hints to as much already, aren't they?), just look them straight in the eye and say, "Funny, the stylist forgot to ask me before she cut my hair if I like pussy," and then smile and walk away. Leave the fuckers guessing.

2. Speaking of, jump Tommy now while he still thinks he likes girls. No, I'm not kidding. Yes, your gaydar was correct. Trust me, you'll thank me later.

3. That I'm-never-drinking bullshit has GOT to stop. You're not now nor will you ever be an irresponsible fuckwit when it comes to alcohol. Here, this is a Smirnoff. You will thank me later.

4. Take that year off before college. Put your foot down. You're right, you're not ready, and this will only end badly. It's YOUR life, damn it.

4a. However, if you do go to the same college after that year off and you happen to run into a hotass British exchange student a couple of years into it, stop fucking clamming up and jump his hot ass. Ahem.

5. You're not going to get published for a while -- *cough* -- but keep writing. You'll get there eventually. You'll meet some great people and some not-so-great people and some phenomenal people who'll steer you to a point where you can almost see it on the horizon.

6. Oh, and to go back to that first bit of advice? You know all that sarcastic shit you want to say and yet never actually let yourself say because you think it makes you look like an idiot? Go ahead, say it, you don't.

Comments

[foenix.livejournal.com]

While it's probably the decision that caused my life to go off the rails, I'd probably still not tell my younger self to stay in college. Leaving after half a semester tracks almost directly to me now 14 years (Oh gods, so long...) later. But I didn't want to study there further, and would never have been truly happy doing whatever it was I might have ended up doing.

And I still foolishly think I can turn that fuck up into a win. I just need to finish a novel, and convince someone to publish it. Or self publish so brilliantly that some poor schmuck would buy the damned thing. ;)

Or, project #2, make a wicked cool comics and/or review website.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I think my whole problem was that I needed to cut the apron strings, and I knew it, and instead I signed up for IUP mostly because my grandparents were a fifteen-minute car ride away. I took journalism because I was trying to be sensible -- I can write AND get a job! -- except I despised most of my journalism classes except for features and editorial writing because I preferred writing creatively and I could do that in both cases.

Lately I've just been falling into the "I'll just get myself published!" trap because it's literally going more successfully than my actual job hunt right now -- I have an awesome agent, I have manuscripts all over the damn place, I'm right there. Except I'm painfully realistic about this sort of thing, so I end up worrying about how futile it is to hope to get published. *sigh*

[foenix.livejournal.com]

You are WAY ahead of me. ;)

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Heh. The one thing I'm eternally grateful for is that I'm way ahead of a lot of people. But then again, my expectations at this point are ridiculously low. They could give me five bucks for a manuscript, and as long as I could finally go to my local Borders and take a picture of a book with my name on it on a shelf, I could die happy. When I say getting published is my dream, I mean it in a very sappy Disneyesque way. It's a little pathetic, actually. ;)

[foenix.livejournal.com]

Oh, I am so right there with you in the whole dreamy nature of it. I always tell people, it's not about the money. If one person reads just one of my stories and likes it, then I consider my goal complete.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I just keep thinking about how I felt about books as a kid ... hell, how I still feel about books. I love books. They're my favorite things in the WORLD. And I want to MAKE one. :D

[foenix.livejournal.com]

*nodnod* That too.

Gods, it had been forEVER since I'd picked up a book that didn't have pictures, and even longer since one wasn't written by Stephen King. Nabbed Time Traveler's Wife, and finished it on Saturday. It makes me so want to pursue writing more seriously...and then I realise I'll never write anything half that good. ;)