Okay, here we go again.

[apocalypsos]

It's time for yet another round of the Pairing List That Ate Fandom. Since I've already done this once, twice, and then again, this would be Round Four. You know, just in case you're counting.

And since I'm feeling in a Q&A kind of a mood ...

I'm new. What's the Pairing List That Ate Fandom?

It's when I put a bunch of character names in a hat and pull them out at random. Whoever ends up together, you write a romantic story about 'em.

Um, do I have to? Because some of these pairings are makin' me throw up a little in my mouth.

First off, see a doctor about that.

Secondly, no one's making you do anything you don't want to. Unless you read this list and find a pairing and get a story idea, in which case that's your muse's fault and you should ... I don't know. Take their Game Cubes away from them or something.

Tell me you didn't actually pull these exact pairs out of the hat.

No, seriously. Well, okay, maybe not out of a hat, but this is how the slips of paper fell. My only veto power came from pulling two characters in the same fandom (or close to it), which is why Pippin/Denethor, Clem/Riley Finn, Duncan/Methos, Mr. Fantastic/Batman, Simon/Zoe, Sydney/Vaughn, Xander/Glory, Clem/Xander, and Kitty Pryde/Colossus didn't make the list.

And you're telling me these pairings, why, exactly?

I like to share in my emotional scarring.

So, what do I do if a pairing on this list gives me ideas?

Again, you should really see a doctor about that.

Oh, you were serious. Well, first you call dibs in the comments. Check the other comments first, because if someone else called the pairing you wanted, you're SOL. You can do more than one pairing, but two people cannot do the same pairing unless I say so.

Why not?

Because this list is a plague upon humanity and more than one story about any of these pairings would probably bring about Armageddon.

Are you serious?

God, I wish. If the apocalypse comes, so much for my credit card debt.

Do I have to make it a romance? Can't they just hang out and play pool and banter in a Kevin Smith-esque fashion?

Uh, no.

Aw, come on!

Hy, it's called a pairing list for a reason. If they can't consummate the relationship, at least let them have their hot, steamy fantasies, damn it.

Heeeey ... some of these characters don't even live in the same time!

It's called plotting, dumbass. You're a fanfic writer. Figure it out.

Does it have to be serious, or can I be silly?

This is where I tweak the rules a bit for this round. If you can reasonably get these two characters together, try to make it serious. It's easy to make any of these pairings a comedic pairing, but this time around, the challenge comes from making it make sense in a more dramatic fashion than usual.

But ... but how am I supposed to do that by the deadline?

There is no deadline for these stories, so you have plenty of time to get these characters together and actually sculpt a longer, less silly story.

Unless one of your characters is a god or a green midget or a great tentacled thing, in which case I think we can stick with silly. 'Cause otherwise, there is much angst and eyeball-bursting.

So what do we do when we're done with our story?

I'll put a post on my LJ (which I'll link to here) where you can post a link. This way, they won't get lost in the shuffle.

*glances over the list*

There's something seriously wrong with you, you know that?

Hey, before I started writing these lists, I was a perfectly sane individual. I had to come to LiveJournal to go out of my bloody mind.

You're totally bastardizing a "Shawshank Redemption" line, aren't you?

Bite me. Bite me hard.

The Pairing List That Ate Fandom, Round Four

1. Roxie Hart/Hercules
2. Diane (Jake 2.0)/Tom Sawyer (LXG)
3. Storm/Lloyd Dobler = wordmaster73
4. Eowyn/David Brent = tenderamaltheia
5. Jareth/Rupert Giles = girlfromsouth
6. Daredevil/Adrian Monk = notassuch
7. Marissa Cooper/Aziraphale = dexwebster
8. Eomer/Lacroix
9. Brian (QaF)/Anya
10. Phoebe Halliwell/Ash (Evil Dead)
11. Ellen Ripley/Hannibal Lecter = leatherdykeuk = A Strange Meeting
12. Kaylee/Dudley Dursley = yanatya
13. Rygel/Angel (Buffy)
14. Lucius Malfoy/Jaye (Wonderfalls) = pekeana
15. Xena/Lorne = trishalynn
16. Westley (Princess Bride)/Mary Camden
17. Harley Quinn/Faith = wal_lace
18. Clark Kent (SV)/Ally McBeal = mice
19. Jay (Kevin Smith)/Paige Matthews = themongkey
20. Amanda (HL)/John Murdock (Dark City) = I love this pairing for reasons I can't even begin to describe.
21. Charlie Weasley/Jack Sparrow = raindroproses
22. Nightcrawler/Vachon
23. Ross Gellar/Lorelei Gilmore = wordmaster73
24. Gollum/Jim Valenti
25. Doyle/Nick (C.S.I.)
26. John Crichton/Ares = voleuse
27. Leo Wyatt/Darth Maul
28. Egon Spengler/Cordelia Chase = siegeofangels
29. Gloria (Misfits of Science)/The Punisher
30. Lindsey/Justin (QaF) = daffybroad
31. Deanna Troi/Boromir =agentrosecotton
32. Seth Cohen/Jubilee = daffybroad
33. Spock/Ted "Theodore" Logan
34. Gambit/Norrington = 3jane
35. Iceman/Scorpius
36. Wayne (Wayne's World)/Drusilla = scrollgirl
37. Piper Halliwell/Trinity = juanitadark
38. Catwoman/Willy Wonka = animal_angel
39. E.T./Chewbacca = nextian
40. Lionel Luthor/Summer (The O.C.) = slodwick
41. Draco Malfoy/Ben (Carnivale)
42. Pilot/Philip J. Fry
43. Worf/Bullseye
44. Mary Poppins/Kirsten Cohen
45. Reed Richards/Alec (Dark Angel)
46. Kyle Valenti/Ace Ventura
47. Luke Skywalker/Rachel Green
48. Vic Mackey/Beast
49. Jean-Luc Picard/Ron Weasley = tenderamaltheia
50. Inigo Montoya/Leo (West Wing) = pekeana
51. Richie Ryan/Liz (Roswell)
52. John Connor/Alex (Clockwork Orange)
53. Haldir/Methos = isabeau
54. Pippin/Ryan Atwood
55. Sabertooth/Gareth (The Office)
56. Kronos/Harry Potter = ranaeros
57. Anna (The O.C.)/Elizabeth Swan = laurelin_kit
58. Crowley/Krycek = voleuse
59. Agent Smith/Sam Seaborn = tobiascharity
60. Dawn Summers/Max (Roswell) = namey
61. Wash (Firefly)/Han Solo = ldymusyc = Best Left Unspoken
62. Mary Jane Watson/Mark Green
63. Kyle Reese/Zhaan
64. Sarah Connor/Joe Dawson = trollprincess = An Invincible Summer
65. Chiana/Sarah (Labyrinth) = tesria
66. Kull/Hugh Fitzcairn
67. Rodney Skinner/Jack Aubrey
68. Dana Scully/Jake Foley = daffybroad
69. Simon (Firefly)/Nick Fury
70. Dr. Evil/Holly Golightly = mice
71. Shepherd Book/Hellboy
72. Monica Gellar/Dorothy Gale = tangleofthorns
73. Sara (C.S.I.)/Aeryn Sun = daygloparker
74. Atticus Finch/Wesley (Angel)
75. Lara Croft/Max (Dark Angel) = leyenn
76. Chloe Sullivan/Inara (Firefly)
77. Michael Guerin/Nat (Forever Knight)
78. Selene (Underworld)/Lana Lang = juanitadark
79. Professor Xavier/D'Argo
80. Lando/Pete Ross
81. Pete Wisdom/Faramir = beanarie
82. Captain Kirk/Buffy Summers = moireach
83. Fox Mulder/Buttercup = wordmaster73
84. Cat Willowes/Data
85. Chandler Bing/Bilbo Baggins = madhuri567
86. Martha Kent/Gandalf = notassuch
87. Sandy Cohen/Silent Bob
88. Ted Stryker/Willow Rosenberg
89. Jed Bartlet/The Bride = yanatya
90. Jayne (Firefly)/Indiana Jones = minotaurs
91. The Terminator/Wonder Woman
92. John Bender/Michael Knight
93. Harmony Kendall/Fleur Delacour = _angelcaido_
94. Merry/Buffybot = fernwithy
95. Will Turner/Johnny B (Misfits of Science)
96. Peter Parker/Michael (Underworld) = kirana_44
97. Albus Dumbledore/Scarlett O'Hara = tempestas_lamia
98. Samwise Gamgee/Tony Soprano = meklorka
99. Captain America/Ethan (Buffy) = wal_lace
100. Doug Ross/River (Firefly)
101. Aragorn/Tara = cesario
102. Q/Sirius Black = unicornwiwings
103. Sark/Jeanette (FK)
104. Frodo/Marrow = 3jane = If You Go Chasing Rabbits
105. Jean Grey/Forrest Gump
106. Zoe (Firefly)/Vaughn(Alias)
107. Skinner (X-Files)/Isabel (Roswell)
108. Jeff Spicoli/Megabyte Damon
109. Chaucer (A Knight's Tale)/Kyle Duarte
110. Mystique/Stephen Maturin = mckittericks
111. Starsky/Donna (West Wing) = michellek
112. Gabrielle (Xena)/Marty McFly
113. Oz (Buffy)/Sydney(Alias) = voleuse
114. Arwen/Rubeus Hagrid =
115. Chris Perry/Bruce Wayne = juanitadark
116. Riker/Nick Knight = yanatya
117. Warrick/Yoda
118. Odo/Peter Venkman
119. Dorian Grey/Stewie (Family Guy)
120. Magneto/Elrond = caudelac
121. Leia/Cthulhu = paladinnoir
122. Prince Humperdinck/Nightwing
123. Theoden/Joan (Joan of Arcadia)
124. Gimli/Rory Gilmore
125. Captain Sisco/Mina (LXG)
126. Saruman/Wolverine
127. Qui-Gon Jinn/Col. Steve Austin
128. John Shaft/Josh (West Wing)
129. Rogue/Duncan McLeod = greensilver
130. Neo/Bruce Banner = thiliel
131. Paige Guthrie/Malcolm Reynolds
132. Pyro/Aphrodite
133. Hermione Granger/Scott Summers = wal_lace
134. Gilderoy Lockhart/Denethor = rynne
135. John Carter/Lex Luthor (SV) = Dear God ... no, seriously. Fuck you.
136. Gil Grissom/Maria Deluca
137. Go-Go Yubari/Glory (Bufy)
138. Clem/Adam (Tomorrow People)
139. Hutch/Sue Richards
140. Morpheus/Louise Beckett
141. Matt Camden/Winifred Burkle = You know, just to make this one interesting, I think I'll offer up the option of being able to write her as Illyria if you want. 'Cause, dude.
142. Darla/James Bond = spyderqueen
143. Connor (Angel)/Ami Jackson = trollprincess
144. Barbossa/Voldemort = malhablada
145. Mad Max/Garth (Wayne's World)
146. Teminatrix/The Dude = *is in awe* I don't know why, but this may be my favorite one of all.
147. Legolas/Xander Harris = voleuse
148. Iolaus/Greg (C.S.I.)
149. Luke (Gilmore Girls)/Metatron
150. Bill S. Preston, Esq/Spike = caudelac
151. Captain Janeway/John McClane
152. Kitty Pryde/Riley Finn
153. Colossus/Obi-Wan Kenobi
154. The Joker/McGonagell = madhuri567

Comments

[tempestas-lamia.livejournal.com]

Not I! *innocent*

*snort* Their masculinity, I suppose. Although no one I know finds Ahnold very attractive...

[mayatawi.livejournal.com]

He's a man? I thought he was some kind of genetically engineered mutant!

[tempestas-lamia.livejournal.com]

Hmm... if he was, do you think he'd be allowed to win the California governency (not a word... >,<)? Gasp! The scandal! All is lost, for the mutants will get us ALLLLLLLL!!!!!!eleventyone!