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Apr. 1st, 2004 09:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsosWell, it's nice to see that I'm not the only one who despises this unholy of unholy days. Maybe it's because I'm gullible on Olympic levels, I don't know.
Everybody else is threatening violence for pranks. I, however, am threatening wish fulfillment. You want to tell me you're pregnant? I'll show you what I learned from that book my mom got me for Christmas, "How To Win Friends and Magically Inseminate the Unsuspecting." Want to tell me you're not feeling well and you think your appendix has burst? Finally, a reason to use all that knowledge I gleaned from "ER" reruns! Heard a rumor the President's been assassinated? Give me twenty minutes, cab fare and a two-by-four and I'll go check.
So, yeah. My hatred of April Fool's Day knows no bounds.
Everybody else is threatening violence for pranks. I, however, am threatening wish fulfillment. You want to tell me you're pregnant? I'll show you what I learned from that book my mom got me for Christmas, "How To Win Friends and Magically Inseminate the Unsuspecting." Want to tell me you're not feeling well and you think your appendix has burst? Finally, a reason to use all that knowledge I gleaned from "ER" reruns! Heard a rumor the President's been assassinated? Give me twenty minutes, cab fare and a two-by-four and I'll go check.
So, yeah. My hatred of April Fool's Day knows no bounds.
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Date: 2004-04-01 07:46 am (UTC)But I bring quotage. Adolescence of P-1 by Thomas J. Ryan. The main character and his girlfriend have sex... oh, some distance from the actual road. The author tells us the details are left to our imaginations, but then adds,
"The details weren't left the imaginations of the occupants of the two cars that stopped to watch along the road winding through the valley below them. Gregory waved feebly to them as he rested. They waved back. It was a momentary source of wonder to him: the detail the naked eye could perceive at a distance of half a mile."