apocalypsos | I hate birds.

18:58 @MarthaPlimpton My bday was yesterday. Might I get a RT of a link to my book for the occasion? :) t.co/fTsHRPls #
19:10 Apparently I have Netflix so I can watch the Star Trek movie five times in one week. (@simonpegg = still my favorite.) #
19:43 Fox News Calls Pepper-Sprayed Female Protestors Over-Dramatic t.co/BAzjTquJ God, that channel's appalling. #
21:28 You couldn't pay me to leave Demi Moore, not only b/c she's awesome but also b/c I firmly believe Die Hard was a documentary. #
21:32 Not only have I not been to the movies in months, but I barely watch TV anymore. If only I were justifying that w/massive amts of writing. #
23:11 Dear Rick Perry: When praying to God for rain in TX, please make sure God isn't holding his U.S. map upside-down. Sincerely, Pennsylvania. #
08:59 Dear Cafepress: The woman who buys atheist and socialist shirts off your website isn't going to want Herman Cain merch. Just FYI. #
10:25 The best pick-me-up in the world may be watching the Christian the lion videos on YouTube. #
10:28 @MariStroud They probably could have gotten more butts in the seats by sticking with the Hugh-Jackman-shirtless-and-boxing angle. #
10:32 @joe_hill So two hipsters walk into a bar. An energy drink cupcake bluegrass bar named Three Wolf Moon. You've probably never been there. #
11:13 I didn't make a bet with anyone to get this retweeted to prove people will retweet stuff on Twitter. Can I still have the money anyway? #
11:45 @MariStroud I saw Someone Like You in the theater, + every woman in the audience sighed loudly at Hugh in his boxers at the exact same time. #