(no subject)
Jan. 21st, 2005 08:42 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsos Ferrell plays an obsessive/compulsive IRS auditor who begins to hear a voice that turns out to be an author who is writing a novel in which Ferrell is the ill-fated protagonist. The auditor heeds the narrator's advice and turns his life around. -- *dies laughing* And Emma Thompson is going to play the author. Oh, God, I have to see this movie.
Nicolas Cage is going to play Ghost Rider. -- I'll be over in the corner, gagging. *eye roll*
Man robs sex shop, steals woman's leather outfit and an inflatable doll -- You know, Build Your Own Dominatrix just isn't the same as using a regular dominatrix ...
The makers of the handy spray lubricant WD-40 proudly list 2,000 uses for their product, from unsticking rusty screws or squeaky bicycle chains to polishing frying pans. But British police have found another -- keeping the public from snorting cocaine off toilet lids in bars. -- Ewwwwww.
A 50-year-old Reno man who was hospitalized after he castrated himself told police he learned of the procedure on the Internet and did so to lower his libido. The man, whose name was not released, called 911 at about 1:30 a.m. Monday and asked for help because he could not stop the bleeding from a self-castration operation, police said. -- See, this is why most people have hobbies. Blech.
A woman in northeastern Brazil has given birth to what one doctor called a "giant baby," a boy weighing 16.7 pounds. -- GYAH. I think that mother should seriously have worn some iron underwear to bed, because that kid was obviously sneaking out of the womb every night to raid the fridge.
But what caught Love's eye when the sisters entered his church were their blue jeans — forbidden for women in some Pentecostal churches. The 83-year-old preacher came down from his pulpit. "You're not wearing pants in my church, you demon," Storey claimed the preacher said. "I said, 'I'm glad I serve a God who can work through my pants.'" -- Hello, and welcome to another round of 'What the fuck is wrong with you people?!'
EDIT: Yay! Maury's got Jack Hanna and cute baby animals on today! *happy dance* Awwwww, dingo pups ...
Nicolas Cage is going to play Ghost Rider. -- I'll be over in the corner, gagging. *eye roll*
Man robs sex shop, steals woman's leather outfit and an inflatable doll -- You know, Build Your Own Dominatrix just isn't the same as using a regular dominatrix ...
The makers of the handy spray lubricant WD-40 proudly list 2,000 uses for their product, from unsticking rusty screws or squeaky bicycle chains to polishing frying pans. But British police have found another -- keeping the public from snorting cocaine off toilet lids in bars. -- Ewwwwww.
A 50-year-old Reno man who was hospitalized after he castrated himself told police he learned of the procedure on the Internet and did so to lower his libido. The man, whose name was not released, called 911 at about 1:30 a.m. Monday and asked for help because he could not stop the bleeding from a self-castration operation, police said. -- See, this is why most people have hobbies. Blech.
A woman in northeastern Brazil has given birth to what one doctor called a "giant baby," a boy weighing 16.7 pounds. -- GYAH. I think that mother should seriously have worn some iron underwear to bed, because that kid was obviously sneaking out of the womb every night to raid the fridge.
But what caught Love's eye when the sisters entered his church were their blue jeans — forbidden for women in some Pentecostal churches. The 83-year-old preacher came down from his pulpit. "You're not wearing pants in my church, you demon," Storey claimed the preacher said. "I said, 'I'm glad I serve a God who can work through my pants.'" -- Hello, and welcome to another round of 'What the fuck is wrong with you people?!'
EDIT: Yay! Maury's got Jack Hanna and cute baby animals on today! *happy dance* Awwwww, dingo pups ...
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 02:04 pm (UTC)::gag:: Who bought this screenplay?
But British police have found another -- keeping the public from snorting cocaine off toilet lids in bars. -- Ewwwwww.
Is this an actual problem? Don't most people use mirrors, anyway? (She says, possibly exposing her total ignorance of the current drug culture.)
A 50-year-old Reno man who was hospitalized after he castrated himself told police he learned of the procedure on the Internet and did so to lower his libido.
Have these people never heard of saltpeter? Or simply looking at bad porn? Geez.
I think that mother should seriously have worn some iron underwear to bed, because that kid was obviously sneaking out of the womb every night to raid the fridge.
::snort:: You know, suddenly my over-8-pound babies seem so...tiny.
But what caught Love's eye when the sisters entered his church were their blue jeans — forbidden for women in some Pentecostal churches. The 83-year-old preacher came down from his pulpit. "You're not wearing pants in my church, you demon,"
::rolls eyes:: Yeah, because Jesus was all about the fashions. I missed the "thou shalt not wear blue jeans to church" commandment, though.
"I said, 'I'm glad I serve a God who can work through my pants.'"
::sporfle:: No, no, I'm not going there. Just too easy.
Re: People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 02:16 pm (UTC)Erm . . . Woody Allen. I've seen the previews-trust me, it's going to work.
Re: People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 02:17 pm (UTC)Re: People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 02:26 pm (UTC)Re: People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 03:05 pm (UTC)Re: People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 04:38 pm (UTC)I think Will Ferrell's not as bad an actor as people think he is based on his material. Ditto Ashton Kutcher and Brittany Murphy. Sir Laurence Oliver they are not, but they're better than average.
Re: People Are Strange
Date: 2005-01-21 06:11 pm (UTC)There we disagree in a major way.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 02:42 pm (UTC)Nicolas Cafe = Ghost Rider = What. Ever.
Giant Baby: This story makes my uterus hurt. A lot.
Pentecostal Church: Those people are nuts, trust me. I once had a boss who married at 16 because she wanted to have sex with her boyfriend, and of course it's better to marry than to burn.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 02:54 pm (UTC)Best. Comeback. EVER.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 04:50 pm (UTC)That was just hilarious.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 03:24 pm (UTC)Re: The Pentecostal Church story...*smacks forehead* Dude, that was far less tolerant than the church I went to, where the Standards (the codes of conduct and dress) were something you had to accept by yourself, not, you know, randomly enforce with strangers. GAH, thanks guys! Thanks!
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 03:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 03:56 pm (UTC)That sounds like fun!
A 50-year-old Reno man who was hospitalized after he castrated himself told police he learned of the procedure on the Internet and did so to lower his libido. The man, whose name was not released, called 911 at about 1:30 a.m. Monday and asked for help because he could not stop the bleeding from a self-castration operation, police said.
Some people consider this to be a legitimate body modification (as in, many of them do it themselves or have it done by a 'friend'. Sometimes during ...playtime.) I consider it to be something that should only be done by a doctor. Regardless of the whacked or not so whacked reason behind it.
Maury's got Jack Hanna and cute baby animals on today! *happy dance* Awwwww, dingo pups ...
Are you sure? TiVo.com claims that it's yet another paternity test episode. Of course, your station might be playing a different ep than mine.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 04:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 04:36 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 05:19 pm (UTC)Also, Pentecostal dudes - seriously, just, no.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 09:41 pm (UTC)I'm not really seeing the upside to this. Christians sort of get gypped in the whole knocked-up-by-a-diety department, don't they? Pants, fah.
no subject
Date: 2005-01-21 09:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-22 03:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-01-22 07:08 am (UTC)*slaps forehead*
I
alwayssometimes question the sanity of my fellow Tennesseans.