(no subject)

[apocalypsos]

Okay, new rule: If you're asking me why I don't own a car or drive to work anymore, no one gets to ask me, "Why doesn't your boyfriend drive you?" EVER EVER AGAIN. Even if I find one tomorrow between the couch cushions. That is not only annoying, it's a wee bit patronizing, the same way "I want to take you out to dinner, but I'll have to ask your boyfriend" is.

First off, if you want to find out if I have a boyfriend, ask. If you want to ask me out, ask. Oh, but before you ask, I don't date coworkers. Sorry, but it's more trouble than it's worth.

And also, "Why doesn't your boyfriend drive you to work?" is a ludicrous question. If I had a boyfriend who could drop everything to fill his gas tank in this economic environment and drive me back and forth from work, I would not have a boyfriend, I would have a pussywhipped independently wealthy walking sex toy with a driver's license. And if I had one of those, do you honestly think I'd be working on anything other than getting more bendy?

ARGH. That's an automatic out in my dating handbook -- a guy who can't come out and say something, for crying out loud.

Comments

[ajinamoto.livejournal.com]

You don't have a sugar daddy?

[startingblocks.livejournal.com]

bendy?

[polyphonic.livejournal.com]

Bendy!

[caprine.livejournal.com]

"I would not have a boyfriend, I would have a pussywhipped independently wealthy walking sex toy with a driver's license. And if I had one of those, do you honestly think I'd be working on anything other than getting more bendy?"

Bwahahahaaaa! I love the way you phrase things.

[astaria51.livejournal.com]

*snerks along*

[melodywhore.livejournal.com]

so... do you have a boyfriend? ;)

[elessar.livejournal.com]

You should've said "no, but I have a girlfriend". That'd really shake him up ;)

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Oh, no, the last thing I need is anybody in this office getting the idea I'm a lesbian or a bisexual. The date requests would quadruple. *eye roll*

[silent-sybil.livejournal.com]

Ah, but see, the guy's introduction of a theoretical boyfriend to the approach allows you to lie with a clean conscience. "Where's your boyfriend?" "Oh, he'll be along later, after he finishes his kickboxing tournament." Not the best option if you feel like telling the guy off, but if it's an elderly customer or something (as it generally is with me) it gives you a polite out...

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Oh, I lie through my teeth to annoying customers who hit on me, but I can't really get away with it with coworkers. Of course, telling them repeatedly I don't date coworkers and there isn't anybody I work with right now I'd think of breaking that rule for anyway doesn't work, either.

[filmbuff.livejournal.com]

Isn't it amazing how, back when I had a girlfriend but not a car, no one asked why she didn't drive me places...

Not that she had a car either. I wonder if she ever got asked about that...

Dammit, now you've got me all ponder-y.

[dragonwhishes.livejournal.com]

I'm getting looks from my mom because of the laughter.

I'm supposed to be trying to write, not laugh!

[nuit-belle.livejournal.com]

You+rant=awesome

[kindyll.livejournal.com]

Bendy. :)
you crack me up.

The rule of life...

[felician-logic.livejournal.com]

Never get your money where you get your honey.

[paradoxymoron.livejournal.com]

dude. can your boyfriend drive me to work?

[muffytaj.livejournal.com]

The proper response to such a question is, of course, "Because I ATE HIS FACE!"