This is always fun ...

[apocalypsos]

Once again, I play the "toying with my fic just to make it interesting" game.

Give me an everyday object and a line of dialogue, and I'll try to write it into Dead Men in Dark Suits when I do the rewrite.

Comments

[harmonyfb.livejournal.com]

"Trust me, the person who coined the phrase 'dead men tell no tales' obviously hadn't meet Bill."

Object: Martini with an olive that looks suspiciously like an eyeball.

[harmonyfb.livejournal.com]

Argh! That should be "met Bill", not "meet Bill". I plead exhaustion and baby in lap.

[silly-dan.livejournal.com]

A black ballpoint pen.
"I can't see anything."

[robyn-ma.livejournal.com]

An oyster.

'You haunt me, and remind me of spackle.'

[insidian.livejournal.com]

"Boxing with gloves is like biking in a bus, and with about as much bloodshed."

A muffin.

[malhablada.livejournal.com]

Object: A pet food dish that says "DOG" but is full of dry cat kibble.

Dialog: "That right there? That's the precise reason why you shouldn't ever read anything you find in a bus station trashbin."

[tinylegacies.livejournal.com]

A Swingline stapler

"Did you know a stapler can be a deadly weapon? Take one step closer and you'll find out all the ways I can use this thing that aren't listed on the box."

[dawning-star.livejournal.com]

Object: a ticket stub
Dialogue: "If my choice were between you and the bubonic plague, I'm afraid the plague would win without contest."

[pelennor-fields.livejournal.com]

"Y'know... at first, I wasn't sure training an army of loyal monkeys to fire guns was a good idea; but here I am, ten years later, and I rule all of Iceland AND Greenland!"

A large purple dildo that plays "It's a Small World After All" whenever it's picked up.

[lakidaa.livejournal.com]

thingy: Transformers Toy.

dialog: Now what's all this I've been hearing about a trout and a piece of toast?

[cleobourne.livejournal.com]

But the trout was mmmmiiinnnnee!


"Mmmm that's good badger milk"

Object: Rubix Cube.

[pixiewildfire.livejournal.com]

Object: A fuzzy stuffed monkey

dialogue: If you don't shut the hell up I'm going to beat you 'bout the head and shoulders then rip out your liver and make tacos and I'm going to like it.

[slodwick.livejournal.com]

A can of Coca-Cola.

"Diamonds and I were never really that close. Honestly."

[xerne.livejournal.com]

object: Frank Sinatra record (which may or may not contain secret occult lectures when played backwards at 78rpm)

dialogue: "I didn't mean to blow it up, but you have to admit, it did look pretty cool."

[illmantrim.livejournal.com]

corncob, "What do you mean I'm Dead?"

[gehayi.livejournal.com]

Object: peanut butter sandwich.

Dialogue: "I have no doubt that it was not your idea. The possibility of you even having an idea strains the boundaries of reality."

[opportunemoment.livejournal.com]

A giant mug of tea.

'This one is a physically impossible move. He'd break the guy's neck! I wish I'd thought of it first.'

[kc-rumors.livejournal.com]

"But sweetie, you taste delicious."

a Denny's

[septembergrrl.livejournal.com]

Banana peel, "I am serious, and quit calling me Shirley."

[rowanberries.livejournal.com]

Object: Compact laser.

Line: "I'd forgotten you were shagging a turtle."