More random thoughts ...

[apocalypsos]

You know what hospitals should hire? Name consultants. You know, for all of those mothers who give their kids embarrassing names without thinking about it. They wouldn't even need college degrees or anything, just half a brain. Hell, they could be fourth-graders.

"Mrs. Seaman, this is Billy, the local schoolyard bully. Billy, tell Mrs. Seaman why you would beat the crap out of Peter if he were in school with you right now."

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I've decided that I'm really glad I'm a virgin. You know, since they're not throwing us into volcanos anymore.

They're not, are they?

Um, forget I said anything.

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Madonna has two kids named Lola Leon and Rocco Ritchie. Is it just me, or is she producing her own strip club? One stripper, one bouncer.

See, you people think I'm kidding. But if she has another kid and gives it a DJ name, don't say I didn't warn you.

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Did your mother ever pull off those useless mommy threats, like, "You keep this up, and I'll put you right back where I found you"? I always wondered how she planned on explaining to people how my head got in there.

Comments

[tree220.livejournal.com]

my cousin's wife has lots of stories on strange names since she works with the WIC program in Indiana. One poor kid was named Vagina because her mom liked the way it sounded. The one I like the best though and let me spell this first as the woman was pronouncing it . . . FeeMallay. When asked where she got the name, the woman said she didn't name her the hospital already had her named when they brought her to her . . . Female Jones.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I still love when I called the woman whose name was Precious Cox. And that was her married name.

Yeah, you know what? That's when I keep my maiden name, you know, unless it's Dix or Ballz or something. Then, what's the point?