And so my mind wandered on the bus ...
Sep. 24th, 2003 10:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsos... where it was promptly abducted by some weirdo with B.O. and sold into brain slavery. The end.
Okay, so maybe not.
Anyway, for some reason, probably because I fried my brain writing fanfic today, I started thinking about that meme from a while back where you sum up the fandoms you're not in, from what you can glean from the people on your friends list. Which is when this one popped into my head.
Angel: David Boreanaz was wooden enough to warrent his own show, but Bob Vila had enough lumber, so he ended up on the WB. Then the characters who left Buffy just when they were getting interesting ended up on Angel, kind of like being sent down to the farm team when you finally get your ass pried off the bench in the batter's box. According to that line of logic, Angel and Buffy will end up together at the end of the show, which will be right about the time Sarah realizes her movie career has had quite enough CPR and she goes crawling back to Joss.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Once upon a time, there was a girl named Buffy who was a feminist role model. She promptly went on to turn her love interests into a mopey detective, a homosexual, a Mary Sue's bitch, batting practice, and toast. The end.
Jake 2.0: Jake is a dork. A cute dork, but a dork nonetheless. He's filled with itty bitty computers that make him superstrong, superfast, able to see in the dark, and telepathic with computers. All this, and he's still not having sex with the goddamn doctor.
Roswell: Michael, Max, and Isabel are aliens, which is fun. Maria and Liz are human, and they're cute. And then Tess showed up and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and then I woke up and everybody was riding off in the Big Gay Orgy Van of Hot Alien Love, 'cause if the fanfic's any indication, that was probably what was written on the registration anyway.
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: You know how your girlfriend, your children, your parents, your friends, your family, the dog, the mailman, and joggers passing your house make it a point to tell you you need a makeover? Yeah, well, five gay men just showed up with TV cameras to dig through your underwear drawer and make fun of the contents of your refrigerator. Should have cut your toenails, dude.
Monster House: You didn't want that living room wall, right? Because we knocked it down and we're putting up a roller coaster, a pygmy village, and a thirty-six hole golf course there.
Now and Again: A great show that I really liked a lot. Unfortunately, I was the only one watching, so it got cancelled. Fortunately, the production company traced where the signal was going and were so grateful, I have an 800 number I can call to get Eric Close to come to my place and do stomach crunches while I sit and watch.
ER: Season One ... a group of dedicated emergency-room doctors work 24/7 to save their patients. Season Whatever-The-Hell-It-Is ... a group of people who draw names out of a hat every September to find out who they get to sleep with until May occasionally work on patients and/or get important body parts lopped off by helicopters.
CSI: Las Vegas has a law that says no one is allowed to have a heart attack at the dinner table or die in their sleep. If you have to die, you must do so after being hung from the rafters by a midget or guzzling eye drop fluid or being attacked by psychotic eight-year-olds with pens.
Smallville: Every week on Friday, the writers turn in the script for this week's episode. Every week on Saturday, they replace Michael Rosenbaum's script after LEX and LANA are switched throughout the script. The fact that the scribbled-in names are in Tom Welling's handwriting is purely coincidental.
Dead Like Me: The only difference between me and George Lass is that she lacks a pulse. And she gets to eat breakfast with Mandy Patinkin every morning, which is grossly unfair. I watch every episode of "Dead Like Me" wondering if Mandy ever gets the urge to slip out of character in mid-reap and say, "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."
Highlander: Adrian Paul is Immortal. Well, at the very least, his ego is never-ending and all-encompassing, which is as close to Immortal as he's going to get. He's kind of like Mr. Rogers, though, in that every once in a while, interesting people show up to hang out with him. Fortunately, some of them try to cut off his head, but his ego is also indestructible, so he lives to fight another day. While those of us in the audience never get our revenge for his continuing to waste oxygen, we can always be grateful that Methos is drinking his beer, Joe is peeping at him in the shower, Richie is annoying the shit out of him, and Amanda is committing the ultimate sacrifice by having sex with him so that the rest of us don't have to. Thanks, guys.
-----
Created by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
fritokal
Five Little Things
--
The idea here is to list five little things about yourself that few people, if any, know, and that you -like- about yourself. (So no bitching about moles on your butt, no listing bad habits, and generally no angst, trauma or injuries. No cheating with things like "When I try to do such and such, it turns out really great, but I never try." either. )
1. I can tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue. (Get your mind out of the dirty place, thank you very much.)
2. My hair has gotten progressively darker since I was a kid. I started out looking like Bubbles from the Powerpuff Girls, and now my natural hair color's sort of brownish. Plus, my eyes are that shade of blue-green-greyish that change color. I like that I've got mood coloring. :)
3. I can usually figure out a movie almost immediately upon walking into a room if it's on the TV. If I haven't seen it, or it's an older movie, it might take me thirty seconds of watching, at most, to make an educated guess, and I'm usually right.
4. I can do almost anything while reading. I was known in high school for being able to get from one end of the school to the other with my nose planted in a paperback the whole time, and all while classes were emptying.
5. When I used to work at Burger King, a couple of other people and I taught ourselves how to throw around the dishrags over our shoulders, behind our backs, etc. I can still do it, too. Tried it today at work with one guy's keys. :)
Okay, so maybe not.
Anyway, for some reason, probably because I fried my brain writing fanfic today, I started thinking about that meme from a while back where you sum up the fandoms you're not in, from what you can glean from the people on your friends list. Which is when this one popped into my head.
Angel: David Boreanaz was wooden enough to warrent his own show, but Bob Vila had enough lumber, so he ended up on the WB. Then the characters who left Buffy just when they were getting interesting ended up on Angel, kind of like being sent down to the farm team when you finally get your ass pried off the bench in the batter's box. According to that line of logic, Angel and Buffy will end up together at the end of the show, which will be right about the time Sarah realizes her movie career has had quite enough CPR and she goes crawling back to Joss.
Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Once upon a time, there was a girl named Buffy who was a feminist role model. She promptly went on to turn her love interests into a mopey detective, a homosexual, a Mary Sue's bitch, batting practice, and toast. The end.
Jake 2.0: Jake is a dork. A cute dork, but a dork nonetheless. He's filled with itty bitty computers that make him superstrong, superfast, able to see in the dark, and telepathic with computers. All this, and he's still not having sex with the goddamn doctor.
Roswell: Michael, Max, and Isabel are aliens, which is fun. Maria and Liz are human, and they're cute. And then Tess showed up and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and then I woke up and everybody was riding off in the Big Gay Orgy Van of Hot Alien Love, 'cause if the fanfic's any indication, that was probably what was written on the registration anyway.
Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: You know how your girlfriend, your children, your parents, your friends, your family, the dog, the mailman, and joggers passing your house make it a point to tell you you need a makeover? Yeah, well, five gay men just showed up with TV cameras to dig through your underwear drawer and make fun of the contents of your refrigerator. Should have cut your toenails, dude.
Monster House: You didn't want that living room wall, right? Because we knocked it down and we're putting up a roller coaster, a pygmy village, and a thirty-six hole golf course there.
Now and Again: A great show that I really liked a lot. Unfortunately, I was the only one watching, so it got cancelled. Fortunately, the production company traced where the signal was going and were so grateful, I have an 800 number I can call to get Eric Close to come to my place and do stomach crunches while I sit and watch.
ER: Season One ... a group of dedicated emergency-room doctors work 24/7 to save their patients. Season Whatever-The-Hell-It-Is ... a group of people who draw names out of a hat every September to find out who they get to sleep with until May occasionally work on patients and/or get important body parts lopped off by helicopters.
CSI: Las Vegas has a law that says no one is allowed to have a heart attack at the dinner table or die in their sleep. If you have to die, you must do so after being hung from the rafters by a midget or guzzling eye drop fluid or being attacked by psychotic eight-year-olds with pens.
Smallville: Every week on Friday, the writers turn in the script for this week's episode. Every week on Saturday, they replace Michael Rosenbaum's script after LEX and LANA are switched throughout the script. The fact that the scribbled-in names are in Tom Welling's handwriting is purely coincidental.
Dead Like Me: The only difference between me and George Lass is that she lacks a pulse. And she gets to eat breakfast with Mandy Patinkin every morning, which is grossly unfair. I watch every episode of "Dead Like Me" wondering if Mandy ever gets the urge to slip out of character in mid-reap and say, "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."
Highlander: Adrian Paul is Immortal. Well, at the very least, his ego is never-ending and all-encompassing, which is as close to Immortal as he's going to get. He's kind of like Mr. Rogers, though, in that every once in a while, interesting people show up to hang out with him. Fortunately, some of them try to cut off his head, but his ego is also indestructible, so he lives to fight another day. While those of us in the audience never get our revenge for his continuing to waste oxygen, we can always be grateful that Methos is drinking his beer, Joe is peeping at him in the shower, Richie is annoying the shit out of him, and Amanda is committing the ultimate sacrifice by having sex with him so that the rest of us don't have to. Thanks, guys.
-----
Created by
fritokalFive Little Things
--
The idea here is to list five little things about yourself that few people, if any, know, and that you -like- about yourself. (So no bitching about moles on your butt, no listing bad habits, and generally no angst, trauma or injuries. No cheating with things like "When I try to do such and such, it turns out really great, but I never try." either. )
1. I can tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue. (Get your mind out of the dirty place, thank you very much.)
2. My hair has gotten progressively darker since I was a kid. I started out looking like Bubbles from the Powerpuff Girls, and now my natural hair color's sort of brownish. Plus, my eyes are that shade of blue-green-greyish that change color. I like that I've got mood coloring. :)
3. I can usually figure out a movie almost immediately upon walking into a room if it's on the TV. If I haven't seen it, or it's an older movie, it might take me thirty seconds of watching, at most, to make an educated guess, and I'm usually right.
4. I can do almost anything while reading. I was known in high school for being able to get from one end of the school to the other with my nose planted in a paperback the whole time, and all while classes were emptying.
5. When I used to work at Burger King, a couple of other people and I taught ourselves how to throw around the dishrags over our shoulders, behind our backs, etc. I can still do it, too. Tried it today at work with one guy's keys. :)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-25 06:01 am (UTC)You are my new hero.
Speaking of which...
Twin Peaks: There's a murder in a small town. It takes over one season to solve it, even though the FBI agent on the case is The. Most. Perfect. Man. Ever. People get possessed and there are aliens. David Duchovny wears a dress, Sheryl Lee snorts coke, and a gorgeous girl named Audrey ties a cherry stem in a knot with her tongue. The best character is an ME named Albert who makes fun of everyone else but loves all of humanity, just like Gandhi and MLK.
The X-Files: There's a big government conspiracy. People get abducted by aliens. David Duchovny does not wear a dress. The show moves from Vancouver to LA and it all goes to hell.
Buffy: Yeah, you pretty much said it all.
Angel: I don't watch it that much, but I know that Wesley talks to a giant Big Boy Burger thingie, winning my ultimate approval.
OZ: Gay porn for prison abolitionists and intellectuals. The first season ends in a prison riot. Lots of angst and star-crossed romance between Keller (among the sexiest creatures to ever cross a TV screen) and Beecher (who sometimes wears a dress.) One of the most sympathetic characters is a cannibal. The best character is Said, who is also insanely sexy and is featured in my default icon.
Kingpin: I started watching it because it has Sheryl Lee snorting coke and some really hot Mexican guys. There is also prison rape. I hope they make it into a regular TV show.
V: Aliens invade. Everyone thinks they're nice, but they're actually lizard-Nazis who eat human flesh and want to steal all of our water. It went downhill as soon as it went from a miniseries to a regular show.
The Osbournes: There are a lot of small dogs. Whenever the show starts to drag, one of the dogs takes a shit, Sharon screams about it, and it's all worthwhile.
Law and Order: I don't like it so much for the show, but because each series features at least one of the characters from Oz. It's very funny watching the Eeeevil Nazi play a criminal psychiatrist.