The producers need to invest in muzzles.

[apocalypsos]

In letters to the designers, just because that's the way my brain's working right now.

*****

Dear Alison,

Oh, sweetie. *cuddles*

That dress was ugly. That bow thing was ridiculous. But you're just so darn ADORABLE. I shall miss you, because the asshole population is growing.

Also, "It's a good thing that you're wearing your riding outfit just in case it's horses." *snickers* You're cute when you're bitchy.

*****

Dear Michael,

YAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Also, please to not be teaching Laura hip-hop. It frightens me.

*****

Dear Jeffrey,

SHUT IT. I liked your dress for once, and you fucked it up by being your usual self. You can't keep your mouth shut for five minutes?

*****

Dear Laura,

Was it entirely necessary to start shit with Vincent when Alison had just gotten kicked off? You couldn't wait until later, when Alison had left? For crying out loud, I like Alison, damn it, so ruining her departure grates. (Sort of like cheese on your sternum.)

Also, you're getting bitchier, and it's not amusing me. Knock it off. The last thing the world needs is two Wendy Peppers.

Your dress was cute, though. *sigh*

*****

Dear Robert,

Your dress made up for the travesties of the last few weeks, although it did look vaguely like Angela's Audrey Hepburn dress from last week. Whatever. You're snarky and you make me giggle. Yes, even when you're ripping into Laura with Kayne, although I'm starting to get the impression that she's asking for it.

Also, the crack about recycling boyfriends? *giggles*

*****

Dear Vincent,

You are on CRACK. Or you were raised by wolves. I can't decide.

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you? Is it contagious? Should we be concerned about the general population? GYAH.

Vincent: "I want to make the opposite of garbage. I want to create art."
Me: "Well, there's a first time for everything."

*****

Dear Uli,

Cute dress, sweetie. ADORED the braiding.

*****

Dear Andrea,

Wow. I didn't like the style of the outfit, but considering the materials, you did a decent job. I can't believe I'm starting to like you now, but with Jeffrey being a self-centered misogynistic prick and Vincent being extremely fucking batshit insane and Laura doing her Pepper impression, you're not that bad anymore.

Yeah, I KNOW. I don't get it, either.

*****

Dear Kayne,

Well, at least you realized it was a disaster from beginning to end. Unlike some people whose name begins with a BATSHIT INSANE.

*****

Comments

[spyderqueen.livejournal.com]

Laura started it because she was so pissed Vincent was in and I can't blame her. A paper tube with crap pasted on it? COME ON! (and Tim agrees according to his take). Her timing sucked, but I'd be pretty mad too. It may not have looked great, but Alison's was so much better than his, Ugh!


Yay Michael!

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Oh, I liked Alison's better (although they both had a lot of problems), and I'm all for calling Vincent on his shit (because someone needs to tell him his designs are ludicrous), but Laura's timing drove me nuts. She could hold it in for long enough for Tim to tell Alison to go get her stuff? It usually only takes him a few minutes to tell the eliminated contestant to leave. It had to be said, but it definitely could have waited until Alison left for her sake.

And then there was what Laura said to Kayne. I'm starting to get this weird vibe, considering how bitchy everybody else is getting about her, that she's doing mean stuff in cut scenes that we're missing out on, and that's the other designers are starting to all jump on her back. (Except for Micheal, who is a sweetheart. *cuddles him*)

[raindroproses.livejournal.com]

The last thing the world needs is two Wendy Peppers.

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!! *shudders*

Sorry. That was a frightening thought. But hey! You could always lock 'em in a room together, and hope for a mutual takeout.

[honorh.livejournal.com]

My money's on Laura. Wendy was a cow, but Laura--she's *scary*! Except when she's beat-boxing with Michael.

No, wait, that was scary, too.

[trishalynn.livejournal.com]

No it wasn't! It was cute. And fueled my Michael/Laura Friend Ship.

[carson-leigh.livejournal.com]

While I thought that Alison's dress was ugly, I really thought Vincent would go today. Honestly, I've never really liked any of Alison's clothes but she's as cute as a button.

I'm really starting to dislike Laura. I think there must be a lot going on behind the scenes for all the other designers to dislike her so much.

Jeffrey grates but I really thought he should have won the challenge tonight. His dress was beautiful and innovative.

[umetnica.livejournal.com]

It is way too early in the season for me to care about nearly everyone. I knew they'd be getting rid of Allison when Heidi said she'd rather look long. Damn that Vincent, I wanted him gone weeks ago!

I don't think Laura's doing any mean off camera. Her and Kayne and Robert I think are just snarking a lot.

[milkshake-b.livejournal.com]

(Argh, I need to stop leaving comments on this post, TP. But it's so shiny.)

I suspect the problem with Laura, especially given that scene with the models and Kayne snapping about her character, might be that she's trying to be The Parent to everybody there, with the possible exception of Michael. Which isn't going to go over that grand to a full cast of adults. It particularly explains her problems with Jeffery, but the reason she is okay with Angela, who frankly needs a bit of a mommy sometimes. (Who just made me like her more by how happy she was for Michael.)

[wufeidragon.livejournal.com]

I thought Jeffrey should have won.... and Alison and Jeffrey had such a good friendship and everything and I just know he's gonna be way more bitchy now that she's gone. She should NOT have been off over Vincent. NO WAY.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

The thing that threw me off about Jeffrey's dress was the belt, which was a neat idea but was sloppily painted. And yeah, it wasn't like they'd had a lot of time, but it kept distracting me from how cool the rest of it was. It was like Kayne's Marilyn Monroe dress, where it was really cool until Amanda turned around and you could see it doing weird bulging things at her hips. Just little problems like that that Michael's well-tailored dresses didn't have.

[milkshake-b.livejournal.com]

Kayne has consistent problems with the sides of his dresses, I've noticed. But hey, at least Uli didn't make another halter dress.

[siberian-skys.livejournal.com]

I really thought Laura was going to be gone. I didn't see anything innovative about that. She sewed a dress out of material, the material was a cloth bag, but it was still cloth. Without a doubt, Jeffrey should have won; that was a beautiful dress.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Well, let's remember -- Keith won that first challenge making an "innovative" dress out of a bedsheet. They'll take something less imaginative if you made it well.

And the belt on Jeffrey's dress was what was throwing me off. I mean, yeah, cool idea, but badly painted. It ended up detracting a little, whereas Michael's didn't have a little problem like that to worry about.

[milkshake-b.livejournal.com]

I'd have put Uli and not Laura in the top three, but while Laura wasn't exactly innovative, she did have several things going for her; it looked great on her model and fit perfect, it had that lovely touch of humor in the back, and she resisted a temptation that Vincent failed at and Kayne nearly failed at: she didn't get overwhelmed by the need to go over-the-top with the materials involved.

[milkshake-b.livejournal.com]

*reads Tim's Take despite having not seen the ep yet*

"The final outfit used the same top, but the skirt was modified – paper and mylar and knee-length. It was better, but it was still a hot mess. Frankly, it looked like it was going to Pattycake’s birthday party at Angela’s art camp. Oh my. Maybe we should inaugurate a Jubilee Jumbles award?"

Oh man. I died. If Tim ever wants my ovaries, they're his. Also, Robert appears to be posing for a pin-up in his photo. Why?

I'm amused to hear that Jeffery's attitude keeps shooting him in the foot despite any talent he has. Seems like every Bravo competition reality show and season has to have one--I still think the moment Tiffany lost Top Chef was the moment she tried to take credit for Dave's dessert as her own.

And Vincent's dress has convinced me that he blew a number of valuable brain cells doing cocaine in the 80s.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I still think the moment Tiffany lost Top Chef was the moment she tried to take credit for Dave's dessert as her own.

And remember when all four of their finale helpers said Harold should win and when Tiffani found out, she told Harold backstage that her back just ran into his knife? That was a classy move, too. She was just full of those.

[milkshake-b.livejournal.com]

Tiffany was just full of classy moments like that. And I wanted to like her, I did, but instead I hated her so bad I missed whole episodes because I could not stand watching her classy her way across the competition. Her and Stephen, but Stephen eventually redeemed himself and is now fun to watch now in that, "Oh you total dork. I love ya," way.

You know, I've still got slash for that show dwelling somewhere in my head. (Just no muse to write it.) I blame you.

[milkshake-b.livejournal.com]

Though I have forgotten she spells it "Tiffani". Maybe it's just a fact I didn't want to remember.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Heh. Well, that's because Stephen didn't come back for the reunion show and make a tool out of himself. He sat there in jeans and a T-shirt passing a bottle of champagne back and forth with Lee Ann. Really, if you're that much of a dork for an entire competition and everybody says so and they STILL like you, that's saying something.

You know, I've still got slash for that show dwelling somewhere in my head.

HEE. You should have watched the marathon yesterday. It almost tempted me to write more. ;)

[ciara-belle.livejournal.com]

Yeah, this episode definitely ruined the love I had for Laura. I liked her dress, but the fact that she was ruining Alison's last moments just made me want to scream at her. Seriously, shut up for 10 minutes and then yell at Vincent later.

God knows he deserves it.

I am so serious about the Kayne and Robert show. I would watch that obsessively.

[elessar.livejournal.com]

Did you say Andrea instead of Angela by mistake or am I just still half asleep? XD

I agree with pretty much everything you say and LMFAO about your Vincent rant. I loved that. SOMUCH

I really hope Pete Wentz doesn't like him anymore (though I think he liked him for entertainment value)

God I need sleep. I bring my fandom into other people's journals now T_T

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Did you say Andrea instead of Angela by mistake or am I just still half asleep?

*snickers* Yeah, I think I was half-asleep at the time, too. ;)

[elessar.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHA okay good that makes me feel a little better XD

I need coffee :x

[varity.livejournal.com]

Aaaw, Allison leaving almost made ME cry. She's so cuuuuute. Also, Vincent? OMG the whole 'It gets me off' thing jsut keeps creeping me the fuck out. He's so WEIRD.

Also, when Laura first started bitching at the end, I though it was just her being pissed that Allison had to leave and Vincent got to stay. Yes, bad moment, but maybe it was just her being really frustrated and there was no other way to channel/express that other than lashing out at Vincent. The crazy man.

Michael=LOVE, even though I did like Jeffrey's dress better, but he's just naaasty.

[idadebeautreux.livejournal.com]

OMG the whole 'It gets me off' thing jsut keeps creeping me the fuck out.

OMG YES. Especially as - have you listened to Tim's podcast? - Vincent evidently was inspired by/channeling his 7-year old daughter's artistic taste. Seriously. He went off on this big rigamarole about his daughter and Tim's reaction was basically, "WTF? Your 7 year old daughter would do a better job on this dress than YOU did!" But the child-daughter aspect of the "gets me off" comment = CREEPY CREEPY CREEPY.

And he doesn't listen to ANYONE when they tell him that his stuff is crap! It boggles my mind.

Double on the Michael love. Jeffrey makes decent stuff, but he's a pile of flaming road apples in terms of personality. I just want to choke him - one, it will shut him the hell up, and two, it might succeed in giving him a neck with definition.

[varity.livejournal.com]

Vincent= Creepier than CLOWNS OMG!!!

Heh, Jeffrey. I still haven't figured out what his tattoo says. It's like french stuff and then 'Detroit' and I'm all WTF?!

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

It's Harrison, his son's name.

[varity.livejournal.com]

Huh. I'm all for the getting your childs name tattoed thing because that's cute. But. It's UGLY.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

The placement is awful. The last thing he needs to do is emphasize his weak chin and make his neck look fatter.

[idadebeautreux.livejournal.com]

When I very first saw him, it looked like that flowing elven script from various famous Tolkein works, and my initial reaction was OMG GEEK LOVE.

Then I realized it was not, and it's a bunch of... place names? Who knows. And I was disappointed, and then later less disappointed, because I wouldn't want a geeky tattoo on a guy who's such a jerk.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

It's his son's name. Which, okay, it's nice to get your kid as a tattoo, but like THAT? It doesn't look cool, it looks ridiculous. (And it's not even that neck tattoos look bad. The spiderweb neck tattoo on Abby on NCIS looks awesome.)

[idadebeautreux.livejournal.com]

It does look absurd. It completely draws attention to the fact that he has no neck and no chin!

[varity.livejournal.com]

Oh yeah, if it had been like elvish stuff that would have made me feel bad for loving LotR!

[thebratqueen.livejournal.com]

Allison was robbed, but Michael's win was all the sweeter for the fact that Jeffrey didn't win.

I'm shallow like that.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I really cannot wrap my brain around why the hell Vincent's still there. I mean, I can -- God knows I'm not stupid enough not to think the producers don't have a hand in it -- but Vincent's the most blatant display of that at work that I've seen in a while. Honestly, the man has NO TALENT.

[thebratqueen.livejournal.com]

My guess? They're scared that if they auf him he'll be up in a belltower.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

This is true. As it is, I'm afraid of him dropping heavy objects off the balcony at the Atlas. Like, say, other designers.

[thebratqueen.livejournal.com]

...is it wrong that I hope it's Jeffrey?

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

No, I was kinda hoping he'd be first, too. I mean, they ARE rooming together. After Kayne, he'd be the closest, and I think Kayne's sharper than that.

[thebratqueen.livejournal.com]

Kayne would push Jeffrey in the way to save himself.

Which, for the record, I'm not saying is a bad thing.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

You know who I feel sorry for? Jia. Poor kid. I just want to snatch her up and run off with her before Vincent puts her in another monstrosity. And what he had the stylists do to her hair last night with those stupid half-cornrow things was criminal.

[neonhummingbird.livejournal.com]

In Laura's defense, according to Tim's podcast, she was far from the only person in the room taking out her frustration on Vincent. Apparently several of the designers were giving him crap, which he was more than dishing back, apparently refusing to acknowledge that his dress was anything other than wonderful. Laura is the one who got the edit, probably because she was the most vehement, but still -- not the Lone Bitch here.

That said... < sigh > I kind of like Laura, more for her relationship with Michael than anything else, but I wish should would pick her battles instead of jumping into everything with the bitch flag flying.

[idadebeautreux.livejournal.com]

Agreed. I do like Laura, I think she has very sophisticated and classy taste (as opposed to, say, Angela and Vincent!), but sometimes she does come across as pretty... snooty? Sometimes unnecessarily so.