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Oct. 18th, 2003 07:14 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
apocalypsosYou know what I think we need this weekend?
One day a twelve year old walks into a house of ill-repute dragging a
dead frog on a string behind him. He slaps a hundred dollar bill on the
counter and says, "I want one of your women."
The madam looks at him and says "Don't you think you're a bit young for
that?"
He slaps another hundred on the counter and says "I want one of your
women."
The madam says "Okay, have a seat. She'll be down in about thirty
minutes."
He slaps another hundred on the counter and says "She has to have active
herpes."
The madam starts to sputter and ask why, but he slaps another hundred on
the counter and says "Active herpes."
She responds, "Okay, have a seat. It'll be about five minutes." Two
minutes later, a woman comes out. They go upstairs (the boy still dragging
his dead frog) and do their deal.
As he's leaving, the madam asks him, "Okay, I have to know. Why did you want someone with active herpes?"
The twelve year old replies, "When I get home, I'm going to sleep with
the baby-sitter, and when mom and dad get home, dad will take the
baby-sitter to her home and sleep with her on the way. Then, when he
gets back, he and mom are going to go upstairs and do it. And tomorrow
morning after dad goes to work, the milkman will come in and mom will
sleep with him, and he's the bastard that ran over my frog."
Okay, your turn. :)
One day a twelve year old walks into a house of ill-repute dragging a
dead frog on a string behind him. He slaps a hundred dollar bill on the
counter and says, "I want one of your women."
The madam looks at him and says "Don't you think you're a bit young for
that?"
He slaps another hundred on the counter and says "I want one of your
women."
The madam says "Okay, have a seat. She'll be down in about thirty
minutes."
He slaps another hundred on the counter and says "She has to have active
herpes."
The madam starts to sputter and ask why, but he slaps another hundred on
the counter and says "Active herpes."
She responds, "Okay, have a seat. It'll be about five minutes." Two
minutes later, a woman comes out. They go upstairs (the boy still dragging
his dead frog) and do their deal.
As he's leaving, the madam asks him, "Okay, I have to know. Why did you want someone with active herpes?"
The twelve year old replies, "When I get home, I'm going to sleep with
the baby-sitter, and when mom and dad get home, dad will take the
baby-sitter to her home and sleep with her on the way. Then, when he
gets back, he and mom are going to go upstairs and do it. And tomorrow
morning after dad goes to work, the milkman will come in and mom will
sleep with him, and he's the bastard that ran over my frog."
Okay, your turn. :)
no subject
Date: 2003-10-18 07:04 pm (UTC)Now, this new movie was coming out, and the guy wanted to go see it in the theatre, but he couldn't just go and see it and let his pet miss out!
So he hatched a plan. He'd go to the movie theatre with the rooster concealed in his clothing!
It worked perfectly. He went in wearing a big old trench coat and the rooster hidden under his clothes, and he sat back, and when the movie started, he undid his pants so the chicken could poke his head out and watch.
Now, the guy was sitting next to an older couple, and the woman glanced over at just the wrong moment. She elbowed her husband and hissed in shock, "Do you see what that young man is doing?"
Her husband sighed. "You've seen a man stroking his cock before."
"Yes, but this one's eating my popcorn!"