I hate Hollywood.

[apocalypsos]

The two things about Captivity currently bothering me almost as much as the fact that it's a boring misogynistic pile of festering maggot-covered garbage:

1. I saw a commercial for it the other day bragging about the fact that movie reviewers, focus groups, preview audiences, and pretty much people in general all think that it's a boring misogynistic pile of festering maggot-covered garbage and you should all go see HOMG YAY!

2. Elisha Cuthbert plays a runway/cover model. She's five-two and skinny but not a toothpick. Hey, that's funny, I just described MY body and if I claimed to be a runway model people would point at me and mock.

Also amusing in a morbid sort of way? That almost every review of it I've read so far contains the following three facts about the plot:

1. The killer has an accomplice.
2. There's another man locked up with her.
3. There's a lame plot twist.

I'd wonder what said plot twist could possibly be but the anvil that just magically dropped from the sky and slammed into my forehead makes it difficult for me to do anything but drool.

Oh, and filmmakers -- words cannot begin to describe how unappealing the concept of watching a girl named Jennifer be tortured for an hour and a half is for me. Really.

Comments

[tsuki-no-yami.livejournal.com]

Seconded.
That Pajiba review was a thing of beauty. I almost want to print it out and tape it onto any Captivity posters I see.