Oh, for FUCK'S sake.

[apocalypsos]

I go down to the cash advance place to see if I can get a hundred bucks to at least make sure my rent is covered, put gas in my car, and buy food at the town carnival this week.

Can I get the money? No, of course not! Why would you think that? Why would anybody think that a CASH ADVANCE place would ADVANCE ME CASH. They stopped doing that for people yesterday. DUH.

(Thanks to some sort of court case, no money for me. Argh.)

I just ... I'm sick of this. I'm sick of scraping by. I'm sick of the fact that only a miracle will get me to Wincon now. I'm sick of my thirtieth birthday coming up and me having nothing to show for it other than a spazzy chinchilla and a car I can barely afford to put gas in. I'm sick of not even being able to find a part-time job and not really wanting to even though at this point I have no choice but to get one. I'm sick of everything, and I mean everything going wrong.

*grumbles*

Now would be a really good time for me to console myself with a funnel cake and some apple pierogies, and I can't.

Comments

[3jane.livejournal.com]

I don't know if it's any comfort, but I consider you among the best and most interesting writers of my acquaintance. And you actually have a significant body of work, which should totally count for your almost-thirty inventory.

[florahart]

The cash advance thing is way, way under fire. Oregon's legislature outlawed most of them in this state last month (creating immense crises by not having the fucking sense to grandfather in existing repayment contracts, allowing places to collect in full immediately by presenting the check given as security...yeah, THAT went well).

And why did they do this? Well, these loan places take advantage of poor people, you see, because of their high interest rates, so to protect the poor poor folks, they need to not do that. Legislators advised taking out traditional loans rather than payday loans, or perhaps applying for long-term credit.

Okay... WHAT? People don't take out payday loans when they have other traditional credit options available. Seriously. And making it impossible for them to take out ANY loans to feed their kids (or selves) is not HELPING. It is ANTI-HELPING. Especially the year after it gets way harder to file for bankruptcy. The message my legislator got was, hi, okay, I think your heart was in the right place? But you were completely unrealistic. Because honestly, if someone has a monthly income of $2000, has three payday loans out and is gradually paying by paying then taking out a smaller one the next day, and owes a total of say $1200? You should have included in your legislation that existing outstanding loans can be paid off over a minimum of maybe 4 months, in whatever way the customer finds most useful. THAT might have been a good approach. THIS was not.

[theliel.livejournal.com]

the issue is that the apr on these loans amounted to 1000's of % and was basically usery.
it's also allowed a string of company's to pay below cost of living and for no large societal crisis to form, as people could 'get by' and thus prop up the consumer confidence numbers and other leading indicators.

my fiance's maid of honor once took out 200 dollars from one of those places. she wound up paying them 1800 back, and that was a 'bargan' deal.

The legislature pretty much should have dicked over the payday loan companys by just forgiving the loans, it would have screwed much fewer people and perhaps encouraged future legal loan sharks from allowing themselves to become a social issue.

How much would you need?

[seferin.livejournal.com]

Have a paypal?

About seventy bucks.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

And yeah, through my livejournal email.

[amalthia]

hugs.

[darci-marie.livejournal.com]

Aww! *hugs* Hon! Your time will come, at least that's what everyone tells me, lol. Seriously though, hang in there!

[swingangel.livejournal.com]

Gosh - I don't know you at all, I only read your stories and such, but it might be time to move away from where you're at. I know you have family there but if you can't support yourself comfortably then it's just not going to get any easier - it sounds like the job market there is beyond awful.

I only tend to lurk in your journal and pop out occasionally to give random unsolicitated advice, like on your car =) The cash advance thing was long coming but handled very poorly imo. The government was trying to do something positive and instead just messed things up more.

Have you ever thought about getting a job writing erotic stories for publications, either online ones or magazines? I mean really, i've read your stuff, if anyone could, you could. I hear it pays decently, and hey - it's writing to boot!

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Oh, I've considered moving away but ... I don't know. Aside from the fact that it would take me forever to gather up the cash to do it at this rate, I don't think I have the energy to do it again, not to mention that there's no place I really want to move to. I just can't really think of any place that makes me go, "Yes, I want to go THERE," and if I'm going to pack up everything and go, it's got to be that or else it's just trading one stressful situation for another.

And yeah, buckling down on the writing thing is the next step. I mean, I'm almost thirty. I was supposed to be published by now, damn it. (Of course, I was also supposed to have a husband, a bunch of kids, a house, and a dog, but let's not even get into THAT. ;))

[swingangel.livejournal.com]

Very understood. I stayed in my crappy apartment, barely scraping by in Sacramento until something shook me up and made it possible to leave. But the money thing is way too true - even if you want to leave it can be more hassle to come up with money to do that than to continue to stay where you're at. And if you don't have anyplace calling to you....

Personally, and again this is just me and my totally unsolicited advice from a complete stranger - I think you need to just bind up one of your manuscripts, hold your nose to make it easier if you have to, and start shipping it off. You're a good writer, the world outside of us LJ people need to see that too =)

[jldecker.livejournal.com]

//points to icon//

//offers bracing support//

[gamiila.livejournal.com]

Sometimes...sometimes life just sucks, doesn't it?

[celli]

*hugs*

[scary-being-me.livejournal.com]

*HUG*

[fyrdrakken]

Agreed. I'm not currently having to struggle to cover my bills -- but I've certainly had to in the past, and I remember how wearing it is to have that ongoing stress.