Random thought to end the night ...

You know what I once stumbled onto one night when I was in college? Dolphin porn ... well, sorta. See, what happened was, there was this story about this female guard at Sea World who got into the dolphin tank one night, and you know how it is. Dolphins are all about the frisky sex stuff.

And now you'll never be able to separate that jumping-through-hoops schtick with disturbing sexual innuendo. Just remember my name when you're chatting up the psychiatrist.

So, anyway, Sea World guard/dolphin luuuuuuv. Which, of course, ewwwwwwwwww. The worst part is, it comes with an unrequested soundtrack. Listen.

"*moans* Oh, Flipper ..."

*hyper dolphin cackle*

See? My birthday present to you all is that you all reach my level of insanity.

You're welcome, by the way. And no, you can't trade it for a pony.

(no subject)

I managed to have an entire phone call with my mother in which neither one of us pissed the other one off. And she sent me a hundred bucks for my birthday so that I could buy clothes.

Hee. Sometimes I really love my mommy.

(no subject)

Today I read the summary of the "One Tree Hill" premiere. Why, I don't know. I think there was crack involved. (It may have been your crack. I'd check my stash, if I were you.)

Anyway, read the summary, which, for those of you looking for the Reader's Digest version, goes a little something like this ...

Lucas plays basketball. Nathan plays basketball. They have the same father, Dan, who's a jerk. When she got pregnant as a teenager, Dan left Lucas's mother, Karen, who is not rich and is therefore a minor saint. Then, considering that the boys are in presumably not far apart in school, he immediately walked out the front door and impregnated the first woman he saw with Nathan. Yeah, I don't get it, either. Oh, and also there's a cheerleader who listens to punk so she's Popular!Cool and Actually!Cool all at once and the quirky best friend girl and an uncle played by the guy in "A River Runs Through It" who wasn't Brad Pitt. The end.

Except that isn't the end, because it's a series and it's the WB and therefore there must be angst until someone in some decision-making capacity takes the show out back and shoots it so it doesn't give rabies to the little brother. Or something.

Ahem.

In any event, after reading the summary of Episode One of "One Tree Hill", I had a revelation. Ten bucks says I can predict the rest of Season One based solely on what I know of the writers at the WB after reading that summary.

( Season One of One Tree Hill, Based On How The WB Operates )

Hee, this is fun. I need to do this with more shows.