(no subject)

The good news: I got offered a permanent position at DHL.

The bad news: I can't take it because the buses I need to take to get home don't run any later than 9.

I want to throw heavy, blunt objects at unsuspecting motorists. Grrr.

(no subject)

You know how Captain Asshat supposedly caught the flu or Ebola or mad cow disease from me and was wasting away with pestilence? He went home after only working a few hours. Every single person in the office immediately said that he left to work on his car.

His biggest complaint was that it "hurt to touch things." I'm shocked and dismayed that at no time did I ask him if his fingers were broken.

(no subject)

The traffic DJ on the radio before said that traffic's light tonight because, and I quote, "the weather kept a lot of people home from work today." We had maybe an inch of snow today.

I feel like telling people I drove to work and back last year in a foot of snow. It's entirely possible people here would think I had superpowers and worship me as a minor diety.

********

Those commercials for the Borders "Make Your Own Box Set" Sale? True love, man. True love. Especially the "Don't you die on me!" box set. I figure out the theme about a second before they said it, and I can't decide whether that's cool or pathetic.

********

I love listening to Don & Mike. "There's still no cure for cancer, but we're building a house on the moon!" *snerk* It's wrong I found that funny, but still.

And also, I'm only one dress size bigger than Paris Hilton?! Cheeseburgers! Bring me all of the cheeseburgers in the land!

(no subject)

Bush advisors: Unfound Iraq arms matter little

...

I say nothing. I just sit here and stare. See?

*stares*

EDIT: Hee! They're playing the audio from the Spiderman 2 trailer on my fave Live365 station! *snuggles radio station*