Well, it's not precisely giving up.

I've spent the past couple of hours lying down on my bed, getting up when my alarm goes off and coming into the office to update my LJ.

Not that I'm getting as many of my fabulous plans done as I thought I would, but on the other hand my headache's fading, so that's good. :)

I think I just gave myself eyestrain or something.

The funniest thing about the whole headache thing is that getting up every half hour to update LJ is throwing the cat right the hell off. He could have sworn that I was going to bed for the night, so he stopped wandering through the apartment and yowling and curled up in bed next to me.

So now he keeps staring at me like, "Wait, are we getting up? Is it breakfast already?"

No, sweetie. Roll over, sleep, and shut the hell up. HEE. :)

EDIT: Okay, does it make me a bad person if I fill in the Titanic coloring book by making the ship bright pink and drawing My Little Ponies on the deck and adding in a giant fire-breathing lizard attacking from the sea?

Hey, and I'm not even drinking! :)

I think I need to chug an entire bottle of Pepsi.

Luckily I think I've got four or five more bottles of it in the fridge.

I'll be so much better when the MP3 player is down uploading and I can put on my headphones and dance a little. That'll perk me up, and maybe then I can actually get something done. *cracks knuckles*

Elliot's bouncing off the sides of his cage like a spazz.

Okay, seriously, just having the Zen working again is waking me up. YAY! Working toy! Woohoo!

Then again, I put it on shuffle and it's been playing Tom Lehrer songs for the past ten minutes, so maybe it still needs fucking with. Not that I'm complaining about listening to Tom Lehrer songs, but still.

I'll tell you right now ...

... if I can get my grubby little paws on this, I'm recapping it right after I'm done with Pulse.

"Oh, no! My teenage son is hooked on porn! Except it's on the Internet, so it's bad!"

Did I ever mention that my mom once found a bunch of old Playboys and Playgirls from the seventies in the attic and gave them to me and my brother? We couldn't decide what was worse, the ginormous mustaches on the guys or the Vaseline slathered on the lenses for the chicks. Also, there was Farrah hair. And not always on people's heads.

Oh, oh! Also, thanks to not having access to the cable stations, I couldn't mock the movie that was showing on Cinemax before -- The Witches of Breastwick.

... gee, you'd think I needed to get laid or something.

Yes, I'm watching "Pushing Daisies" again.

But when I'm done I'm going to go back to the Pulse recap. So there.

Well, unless I pass out. WHICH I WON'T.

*fist in air*

This is what happens when I clean.

The cat finds new hiding places to call his own.

The shelf in my computer desk has been stuffed full of paper and notebooks up until now, but I emptied it out and Otis has been sniffing around it all night. So I tossed my flannel throw blanket and now he's moved in, quite possibly for good.

Heh. He's going to take up residence in there and then I'm going to have to explain it to my parents. :)

What have I accomplished so far today?

Well, I downloaded porn. That counts, right?

Seriously, right now I'm at staring-at-vacant-walls levels of consciousness.

The cat and chinchilla are entertaining me by staging elaborate slapfights instigated by the cat licking the cage bars. And no, that's not my sleep-deprived brain at work..

Why am I subjecting myself to a bad movie when I'm like this?

I imagine it's because it's sort of like being drunk, except cheaper.

I do not want to anticipate just how tired I'm going to be at work tonight. *sigh*

Ha!

The funniest thing about today is that I had these deep and meaningful (well, for me, anyway) plans about what I was going to post today and the topics I'd talk about, and most of the posts I've made had been ridiculously content-free. It's like they should get a stamp of approval from Weight Watchers or something.

BLARGH.

The sky looks disgusting, like it's going to start raining any minute now.

Aw, hell, I'm going to sleep all day anyway. What the hell do I care?

Almost done.

I think I'm the only one in town who's awake right now. Heh.

Heh.

You know, now would be a good time for me to make breakfast.

... yeah, right.

Almost done

Still no sign of life in town. Heh.

I'm getting dirty looks ...

... from the cat.

I think he just wants me to go to bed already and leave him the hell alone. :)

I keep taking naps in between posts.

Hey, as long as I wake up to post, right?

(I'd feel guilty but I've got to work tonight, dude. It's either this or sleep all damn day long.)

Only one more Blogathon post and then I'm done.

And then I can go to sleep and STAY THERE. \o/

Done!

Blogathon over. YAY.

*wanders off to bed*

All right, that's it. Drastic times and drastic measure and all that.

So ever since I've been awake (which is two hours long than I've wanted to be awake, and I'm still goddamn tired and it sucks on toast), I've been thinking about my writing and how this whole writer's block is not going to crack unless I make a change. So I'm going to do a little reorganizing.

First off, reel_spn and spn_harlequin, which at this point look like lost causes. There's no way I'm going to get them done at the rate I'm going. It'd probably be better for me to just drop out of both.

Secondly, the two Sweet Charity assignments I still have to do. They WILL get done this week. They may be a smidge late, like a day or two, what with me having to work the first four days of this week, but I will get them finished this week, Clex and Rach, I swear to GOD. Witches' honor. :)

After that, my plate is clean. CLEEEEEEEEEEEAN.

The thing is, I don't know when the hell fanfic became more of a focus for me than my original fic, but it shouldn't be. That's not to say I'm going to turn around and stop writing fanfic or anything. But I think I'm focusing way too much on fanfic in a way that's making it less fun and more work, and I hate that. I mean, I haven't touched the Books of Boggs in a while, and usually with the length of time I've spent ruminating on the original fic I've got the bare bones of a map for on my wall, I've got tons of character and mythology notes scribbled down in a notebook. I just don't, and I don't like it.

Like I said, though, it's not like I'm going to stop writing fanfic or anything. We're something like two months away from the fall TV season. I think I'd crack under the pressure if I didn't write whichever bunnies popped into my head. The spoilers for SPN make me giddy, and Pushing Daisies is already feeding my jones, and I don't doubt Heroes and Ugly Betty will give me something to write about. But right now it's ALL fanfic on my schedule and it just can't be. Hell, look at last year -- when original fic was foremost on my schedule and fanfic was on the back burner I was pounding away on three different novels in the Books of Boggs series and knocking out something like ten to fifteen fanfics a month. I'm not doing that this year and it really bothers me.

SO!

Sweet Charity fic for Clex and Pulse recap, done by this weekend.

After that, I WRITE SOME GODDAMN BOOKS.

*fist in air*

Um, but first I take a nap. Mmmm, post-Blogathon napping. *happy sigh*