Oh, thank FUCK.

Hey, look what I did!

Heroine Addiction:

52408 / 100000

I'd write more today, but I'm tired and achy and I want my bed. But hey, more tomorrow! Hopefully. Somebody knock on wood for me. Or better yet, hire a goon to beat up Pinocchio on my behalf. That's got to be worth thirty or forty wood knocks, yes?

*squeak*

What better way to start a day with a baby koala?

*dies*

Sometimes the internet makes me happy when skies are gray. *hearts*

So I was killing a few minutes on Yahoo and I clicked on a link to Angelina Jolie taking her daughters to the mall because, hell, she's got cute kids. Usually I avoid the comments on Yahoo pages, especially for pictures of celebrity kids, since just because they're small children never stops people from being douchebags on the internet.

Today, though ... HA. HAHAHAHAHA. Here's one comment accompanying a picture of Angelina with her girls:

Shiloh is a beauty ... she'd be perfect to play Nessie in the last installment of Twilights ... ( Breaking Dawn ) ... turn her into a brunette with ringlets that fall to her waist and again she'd be perfect ... What do you think ? ? ? ?

And here's the one right after it:

awww yea good idea but suri cruise would be adorable as renesmee.

OH MY GOD. Every time I manage to slip up and think about how they're going to film Breaking Dawn, I cannot stop laughing at ALL. And yet I've yet to wonder who they're going to cast as the Loch Ness Mary Sue. Quick, slap a wig on the creepiest small child you can find! *chokesplorfles*

Also speaking of Brad Pitt, at least tangentially, there was an article on Yahoo yesterday about celebrity nicknames that mentioned that he signs into hotels under the name Carl Con Carne. Which I thought was the most awesome thing on the planet until I skimmed further down and read this:

[George] Clooney once had fun taunting hotel staff when he signed in as Arnold Schwarzenegger, forcing uncomfortable employees to refer to him by a name they clearly knew was not his.

Heeeeeeeeeeee.

Tonight's episode of AGT -- the good bits that are already up.

Luckily -- if you want to call it that -- nearly all of the cast in the first half-hour sucked on whole-wheat toast, so I could switch back and forth between that and I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant, where a woman having a relapse of her MS had twins. Er, surprise! Heh.

Anyway, this is Lawrence Beaman singing "Old Man River," and it's goddamn amazing. DAMN.

( And another one ... )