Hmmm.

It's lunchtime on a Monday, my apartment is clean, I'm the only customer in the cafe, and I'm somehow managing to eat my soup and write Heroine Addiction at the same time.

So far, a good day.

That is, of course, Fate's cue to have a screaming squirrel on fire bound through the cafe's front door and leap directly at my face. Such is my life.

(Note: I have never actually had a good day ruined by burning rodents. I woke up halfway through the night last night because I had a nightmare that bats found their way into my apartment, bit Elliot and Dexter, and turned them into vampchillas, but at no time were they on fire. Or sparkly. Although they are stalking me.)

EDIT: Oh, also, you know how I said my brother is using his TV as a computer monitor? Well, yes, now he's got both his regular monitor and his huge TV attached to the computer, so he can play WoW on one and chat in the other or whatever the hell he's doing with it. I suddenly felt a hundred times less lazy than I normally do these days, so I almost wanted to thank him for that.

OUCH.

Spotted on Not Always Right ...

Me: “Hello, thank you for calling [electronics store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. I bought a Game Boy for my son a few days ago from your store, and it’s not working.”

Me: “Did you purchase a warranty?”

Customer: “Yes, is there anything you can do? My son was playing it earlier, and it suddenly turned off and refuses to turn back on.”

Me: “Maybe it ran out of batteries. Did you try and recharge them?”

Customer: “Wait, this uses batteries?”

Me: “Yeah, there’s a charger that comes in the box. Try plugging that in and waiting a few minutes and then seeing if it works.”

Customer: “But I threw the box out.”

Me: “Did you take everything out of the box?”

Customer: “Let me ask my son.”

(I was put on hold for a minute.)

Customer: “Well, I found the charger, but it doesn’t look like I’ll be needing it.”

Me: “Why not?”

Customer: “My son just snapped the system in half because he couldn’t get it to work. I don’t suppose the warranty covers that?”

Me: “Unfortunately, no.”

Customer: “I see. Then I have one more question: do you have any electronic child-spanking-devices?”

Me: “Nope, sorry.”

Customer: “I see. Guess I’ll need to do it the old fashioned way.” *click*

Spanking? Hell, if my brother had been that dim, my mother would have no trouble KILLING him.

Nobody's awake at Netflix.

Jennifer, we think you might enjoy:
Hannah Montana: Season 1

Oh, yeah? What tipped you off? The near-totality of action movies and British TV shows on my queue? Or maybe you examined my queue and just want to give Confessions of a Shopaholic a friend. A silly, stupid friend.

In the realm of Things That Will Probably End Badly ...

... I've connected the netbook to the spare flatscreen I was going to try to turn into a TV.

Which is still something different, let me tell you. After eight months using primarily the netbook with its ten-inch screen (something I've never had a problem with), I'm looking at this on a 19-inch now and I'm like, "Holy crap, this is MASSIVE."

I can't even imagine what it would be like to be my brother right now, looking at his thirty-two inch screen (I checked with my brother; I could have sworn it was bigger than that, but whatever, it's still huge). I would feel like the computer was trying to intimidate me. Now I just need to figure out how to have one program open on the netbook and another open on the monitor.

Wait, wait ... I think I've got it.

... aaaaaand I don't.

This is one of those situations I wish was solved by simply poking it with a stick.

EDIT: Never mind! I got it! \o/

HA!

My brother responded to a question about the whole computer monitor situation with, "Easy peasy lemon squeezy."

At least, I think it was Bryan. After that text, I suspect I may have really been talking to that saccharine-sweet old lady who used to teach quilting on PBS.