(no subject)

[apocalypsos]

You want to know what the definition of irony is? It's that according to "Chasing Amy" and "Gigli," Ben "Hi, I'm Matt Damon's better half!" Affleck is apparently the cure for lesbianism. You'd think it'd be someone with slightly more testosterone than him ... you know, like Jennifer Garner or the U.S. women's soccer team or something.

Comments

[wal-lace.livejournal.com]

I thought Sean Connery was the Official Cure for Lesbianism?
Of course, he's getting old. He needs a successor. And J-Lo's bitch ain't gonna cut it.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

Ah, Sean Connery. *user thinks of LXG and The Accent and happy-shudders* He's the oldest guy I'd still have sex with. I can't decide whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.

[justbluemyself.livejournal.com]

Sean Connery is evil! I know this statement will not win me any popularity contests, but I swear it is true. How many men do you walk by on the street who are that old, yet have young women ready to bed down with them? Evil, I tell you!

(And the speech impediment! Gah! You're rich, man! You can afford to see a speech therapist.)

My sincere apologies to anyone, besides Sean Connery, who I may have offended.

[wal-lace.livejournal.com]

It's not a speech impediment. It'sh a Schotsh acshent, and the making of his fame.

And, as a man who will one day be old and hideous, I have to respect Sean.

[musyc]

*falls over laughing*

It'sh a Schotsh acshent

Best written representation of Connery's accent I've ever seen.

[justbluemyself.livejournal.com]

He's the only Scottish person I have ever heard who talks like that. I think it's a bit more than an accent.

[workingslacker.livejournal.com]

What you said.

The thing that gets me is that he's a big star, but a lot of his movies are crap. How does this work? What kind of secret magical pact did he make to get famous? If I had the time, energy and inclination, I could probably write my thesis on the absurdity of Ben Affleck's fame. Or, at the very least, mock him a lot.

Re:

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

You know, I get that he's cute. Fine, he's adorable. But he can't act. He just can't. He comes on screen and it's just ... meh.

I'll be the first to admit I will totally go see some movies under the strict direction of my flaring hormones, regardless of how good or bad they are (ask me about my going to see Hugh Jackman's crappy movies sometime), but B.Fleck? Eh, no.

And as someone whose dream is to get into screenwriting, I find the fact that he basically *helped* Matt rewrite his script and still got an Oscar annoying as hell. Where can I sign up to help Matt Damon write a script?

Hee. Tell me their little verbal jab-fest regarding their careers in "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" wasn't dead on target. :)

[workingslacker.livejournal.com]

And as someone whose dream is to get into screenwriting, I find the fact that he basically *helped* Matt rewrite his script and still got an Oscar annoying as hell. Where can I sign up to help Matt Damon write a script?

The line forms behind me. I adore the fact that Ben was basically the typist. I'll happily type for Matt, or offer constructive crit, or be his fluffer.

*cough*

I honestly can't wait to see Gerry, the movie Matt wrote with Casey Affleck. Matt's going to run out of Afflecks pretty soon. I wonder where I send my resume...

Hee. Tell me their little verbal jab-fest regarding their careers in "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" wasn't dead on target. :)

Hee! It was. I adore Kevin Smith, but honestly, that scene was the highlight of that film.