Gacked from miggy ....

[apocalypsos]

What the hell, why not?

Give me 1000 comments in this entry. Or whatever, really. YOU, in particular, don't have to supply the whole 1000, but a tiny contribution would be nice. Then let me know if you post this in your journal and I'll return the favor.

Dudes, so this is your chance to spam me with anything! Pictures, lyrics, the word SPAM over and over. Feel free to tell me something about yourself, or screen your comments. Do whatever you want! It's all up to you.

Okay, so I realise 1000 is a tall number so just spam away and we'll see where we get up to. Please entertain me!

Comments

[akacat]

A Blonde and a Lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blonde, tired, just wants to take a nap, politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa."

Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep. The lawyer, now agitated, says, "Okay, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500.00."

This catches the blonde's attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.

The lawyer asks the first question: "What's the distance from the earth to the moon?"

The blonde doesn't say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. "Okay," says the lawyer, "your turn."

She asks the lawyer: "What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?"

The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the net and the Library Of Congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworker, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the blonde, and hands her $500.

The blonde says, "Thank you", and turns back to get some more sleep. The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the blonde and asks, "Well, what's the answer?" Without a word, the blonde reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.

Supposedly true story I read on the net once

[silly-dan.livejournal.com]

This is a true story told by a district attorney who asked not to
be named. It happened at a Santa Monica Beach around 1997.

The district attorney was walking his dog late at night on a deserted
beach. Coming toward him from the other direction was a rough looking
man whom the D.A. recognized as a career gang member who he had sent up
to San Quentin for 10 years on an assault and robbery charge. The
ex-felon was a big man covered with tattoos. The D.A. was of medium
height, with a paunchy stomach, balding, with glasses, and looked more
like an accountant than a high-powered D.A.

As the gang member approached, he was scrutinizing the D.A. carefully.
He stopped in front of him and said in a tough voice, "Hey, I know you!"

The D.A. answered in a low growl, "Yeah, well I know you too."

The gang member said, "So where from?"

The D.A. snarled, "L-block, San Quentin."

The gang member's face changed completely.

"Yeah, bro'?" he asked sympathetically. "So how's it going?"

"How the fuck do you think it's going?" the D.A. snarled with a grimace.

The gang member slapped the D.A. on the back and said, "Hang in there,
bro'" and went on his way.