Today I went to the zoo and I saw aardvarks, bears, camels, donkeys ...

[apocalypsos]

Okay, so maybe not. ;)

So, I did end up going to the zoo but I didn't get to see the cheetah cubs. I got to the zoo at about quarter after twelve to find a line extending almost to Connecticut Avenue going to the cheetah enclosure. So I just got into line and started fiddling with my camera. What felt like several hours later ...

GUY BEHIND ME: How much longer until the cheetah cubs go away?
WOMAN BEHIND HIM: They're only out from 11 to one.
ME: *checks iPod and sees it's 12:50*
ELDERLY COUPLE TWENTY FEET AHEAD OF ME: *turns to stone*
LITTLE BOY IN FRONT OF ME: I like The Wizard of Oz. I like the Tin Man.
ME: *pounds head against sidewalk*

So, since it wasn't worth waiting for the cheetah cubs if I wasn't even going to see them, I broke out of line and wandered off to take pictures of other animals.



This is a capybara, otherwise known as a Big Fucking Gigantic Yet Oddly Cute Rat. Capybaras eat hay, and pellets, and a young Cary Elwes dressed entirely in black.



And then I found the hippo. Which wasn't difficult, because it's hard to lose a hippo.



I think an elephant and his crap are self-explanatory.

Then I wandered off to the Great Ape House, in which the apes were engaged in a Jerry Springer episode. The father kept chasing after the kids and shoving them around, while the mother sat off to the side with the same look your mother used to get on her face when you and your siblings were screaming and your father made the mistake of saying, "I've got to watch the game. You can handle this, right?"

I didn't get a photo of the apes, because the glare from the sun through the windows kept reflecting bitchy middle-aged women on the glass, but while I was kneeling in front of the glass, an adorable little blond girl with pigtails wandered up to me.

LITTLE GIRL: Are you a mommy?
ME: Nope.
LITTLE GIRL: Are you a sister?
ME: Nope. I came by myself to take pictures for my mommy and my friends.
LITTLE GIRL: That's a nice camera.
ME: Thanks. Santa gave it to me.
LITTLE GIRL: I wish I had a camera like that.
ME: You want to see the pictures I took so far?
LITTLE GIRL: Okay!
ME: *dies of cute*

And then I showed her the photos I'd taken so far, and then her mother showed up to take her to see the big cats before I could do something rash, like file formal adoption papers.



So then it was off to the Reptile House, which is kind of embarrassing with me because I have a tendency to coo at anything with scales. This won't serve me well if I'm ever surrounded by alligators. This made me look particularly stupid when I kept squealing, "Helloooooo," at something that's basically got enough bits to make four snakes instead of one.



I don't remember what kind of lizard this was, I just remember it had tiny sharp teeth and red eyes and had perfected the ability to say, "I loathe you all and curse you to the fiery depths of Hell," without actually saying a word. I wonder if he's giving lessons.

Then I went to the invertebrate house. (Invertebrates are animals without spines. Examples of invertebrates include the octupus, the squid, and Donald Rumsfeld.) Which is where I took these pictures.





Now, you have to understand my love of seafood. My immediate reaction to seeing both of those is always, "Man, I could go for some lobster." Which is sad, because as a vicious taunt, towards the exit of the National Zoo exhibit is a display of seafood packaging and spices. Aw, man, that's not fair. (Of course, it didn't stop me from getting a fish sandwich at the restaurant. In fact, I couldn't get there fast enough, and it's possible I teleported there and just don't know it. Hee.)



I solemnly swear that I didn't ask for the camel to smile for the camera.



And see? It's not like I didn't get any photos of big kitties. Don't you just want to cuddle that big kitten? *snuggles, gets eaten by lion*



According to the little sign in front of the cage, this was a fishing cat. All I know if that he came when I called him. Awww.

And last but not least ...



When I first walked over to the red pandas, this one was all sprawled all over the branches in a way where the only clear picture I could get of him was of his butt. But then everybody left and it was just me and I called out, "C'mon, buddy, turn around so I can see your cute little face." So then he yawned, got up and faced me, and I got a picture. Oh, my God, I can talk to the animals! *dies*


In other news, I'm rooting for the Eagles because they're the underdog, but daaaaamn, Tom Brady is really fucking hot.

Comments

[aliaspiral.livejournal.com]

bwah! your commentary of the animals rock. and i also wish to perfect the ability to say, "I loathe you all and curse you to the fiery depths of Hell," without actually saying anything. sign me up for lessons please.

and red panda! yay!

[http://users.livejournal.com/_inbetween_/]

i can't believe it - i was going to tell you about my favourite animal that i only recently discovered, and there it is! the little cat-panda-cutie!

[vampirespider.livejournal.com]

ROUS!!! I love ROUSes (I did not know the were called that. I've always called them ROUSes...)

[demented-pants.livejournal.com]

Just RUS. The o is lowercase. :)

[fmith.livejournal.com]

Re: Tom Brady: I live in Massachusetts, and at the entrance of my highschool there's a huge Tom Brady poster. I think it's a Got Milk ad, but it's nice to see in the morning.

[gamiila.livejournal.com]

Capibaras...my favourite animal (after cats, donkeys, wolves, bears, pandas, mongooses, platypusses, and pretty much any other animals that live in zoos, with the exception of reptiles, insects, fish, birds and stinking hyanas)! And a red panda...ooooh, red panda! Cootchy-chootchy-coo! My favourite animal (after cats, donkeys, bears, etc.)!

[secretbutterfly.livejournal.com]

SO. Freaking. CUTE!!!
I remember seeing the capybaras at the San Francisco Zoo. I always thought it was cool that there were overlarge hamsters big enough to eat me...lol.

[silly-dan.livejournal.com]

That is the goofiest looking camel ever. Even by camel standards.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I agree. :) I do love the heck out of him, though, because I've been at that zoo four times since I moved down here and that camel is always out to be seen. (Unlike the pandas, who have way too much fun staying as far away from me as possible. Grrr.)

[octopedingenue]

I love capybaras! They always make me think of The Wump World by Bill Peet.

I want a smiling camel for my birthday. He can carry my books to class.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I love that camel. He's a sweetie. :)

[claudia79ad.livejournal.com]

I swear my family saw a capybara at the San Diago zoo, and couldn't remember it's name. ::solves the bunny-goat mystery::

[neadods.livejournal.com]

You are the only person I know who can reduce me to fits of laughter with a description of a trip to the zoo.

[slodwick.livejournal.com]

That lizard is an iguana. The Ex kept two of them in a bright yellow, homemade plywood cage in the living room of our apartment. It was very tall, and they were fight with each other and tumble from the top shelf to the bottom.

I would laugh, because I hated them - I learned the "I curse you to the fiery pits of Hell" look from them. They would just hiss (yes, they hiss, like scaly cats), and seethe quietly.

[xblackrose666x.livejournal.com]

I went to the zoo today, and did get to see the cheetah cubs

They were adorable! I didn't get any pictures, but my friend did, she should be putting them up in her lj soon.

*Unashamed fangirling ahead*

[dragonwhishes.livejournal.com]

EEE! Those are adorable!

*Wishes she had a big sister. Wishes said big sister would be like you.*

Re: *Unashamed fangirling ahead*

[hannahrorlove.livejournal.com]

Hey...I was just looking at that book earlier today. Weird.

[girlwiththebook.livejournal.com]

OMGALIONSQUEALSANDDIES

*faint*

[starfishofelves.livejournal.com]

Capybaras! Awwwwww! *rendered incoherent by teh cute*

Because it had to be done

[kassandra05.livejournal.com]

[sabotabby]

Holy shit...that's way too cute.

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

And just think, I didn't even share the story of the toddler in the reptile house who went freaking ballistic telling me that there were OMG fish!!! in the turtle tank! YAY! (It was a cute ballistic, though. And then I pointed out that there was a turtle in there, too, and he was mesmerized. It was adorable. :))

[teshara.livejournal.com]

Hippos rock!

[foresthouse.livejournal.com]

and a young Cary Elwes dressed entirely in black.

Hee!!

The camel and the red panda are to DIE FOR. So cute!

It is the saddest thing ever that I've lived here for a year and a half and still haven't been to the zoo. But...I can never find anyone who wants to go!

Oh well, your pictures have resolved me - I shall go to the zoo and see the fuzzies!

[pandoras-closet.livejournal.com]

*Looks at the lobsters* Damn! Look at that claw!

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

All I can think of whenever I go and see those lobsters is to wish for butter, and lots of it. I'm probably not the best person to go into the invertebrate house.

They were feeding the nautilus fish when I was in there, and a guy was answering questions about them. I was thiiiiiis close to asking, "What do they taste like breaded and fried?"

[http://users.livejournal.com/_redpanda_/]

*squee at the last pic, among others* But the enclosures in those first three pics look hideous. Especially the hippo's. :(

[apocalypsos.livejournal.com]

I know. I think it was because the weather's still not warm enough and they might have to stay inside, but yeah. Blech. (And I figured you'd like that last pic. You should have seen him in person. He kept making faces at me. ;))

[gruyere.livejournal.com]

Capybaras rock. I want one so I can name him Speak.

[tabbyclaw.livejournal.com]

We have some capybaras at my local zoo, but they're horrible and mean. There's a male enclosure, a female enclosure, and a special enclosure for the one female who's been excluded from the little clique the others formed to torment her.

[muffytaj.livejournal.com]

That camel is SO MESSED UP.

Did you know hippos are the number 1 killer in Africa? True fact, google it if yee doubt.

[frith]

The big liz is a rhinocerous iguana. See http://animal.discovery.com/fansites/jeffcorwin/carnival/lizard/rhinoiguana.html We used to have a pair. The male had the annoying tendancy to attack my boots when I went in to clean or feed.