(no subject)

[apocalypsos]

I just realized how weird the LJ panel at DragonCon is going to be to me. It'll be like being in a roomful of friends and strangers (this is the part where I snark about nobody being stranger than the gang on my friends list, right?) while wearing a bandanna over your eyes and having to guess who's who by picking their pocket when they're not looking and rifling through their ID.

And thinking about it, it'd probably end up that "friends list envy" is the unofficial "penis envy" of LiveJournal.

Me: I have a hundred and forty on my friends list.
Anonymous LJ Stranger: Oh, yeah? Well, I've got two hundred on my friends list. *raspberry*
Me: *genuinely confused* How do you have sex with your friends list when it gets up to 200?
ALjS: *also genuinely confused* You have sex with your friends list?!
Me: You don't?!

Followed, of course, by dual staggers of weary confusion towards the nearest Internet connection, where I'll snuggle up to my friends list in gratitude and the anonymous LJ stranger will do like that monkey in the sex experiments and keep hitting the "Update Journal" button and shagging his friends list until he dies.

Of course, if he had worn a finger condom, that wouldn't have happened. (Shameful, really.)

And just for that ... *user pounces on her friends list and shags away, wondering just the right way to say that she's carrying her friends list's love child*

Comments

[wal-lace.livejournal.com]

Wasn't me. I was asleep. Every time. Rats.

What's that? You took advantage of me in my sleep? That's... I demand a postcoital cigarette, at the very least.