I have absolutely no patience with secrets. Even stupid ones.

[apocalypsos]

I want to know what Prince Charles' "incident" is.

I don't even give a fuck about the man. I don't care if he was caught doing unspeakable things with the "Christmas Story" electric sex lamp, strawberry licorice laces, three sheep, and any random Spice Girl. I just care that someone did something and no one is telling me what it is.

I wish they'd just say what the hell it is, because quite frankly, anything I come up with in my head is going to be infinitely worse than the truth. Years of writing beyond-strange fanfiction has left me with the uncanny ability to randomly pick items out of my mental top hat and marry them together in a scene in a fashion that is gross, sexual, or both. So, for instance, I can totally come up with an icky situation in my head in which Prince Charles was caught with an order of fried calamari, forty-seven hamsters, half a baby bottle of motor oil, one of Princess Diana's sexier black dresses and Michael Jackson. And I sincerely doubt that's the incident in question.

Oh, Jesus in lacy lingerie, let that not be the incident in question.

Was he caught having sex with a male aide? Because I could totally understand that. And in some weird way, it'd explain Camilla.

Is he really Gonzo the Muppet? 'Cause that would really explain Camilla.

Argh. Can't stand secrets.

*headwall*

Comments

[sparkyred.livejournal.com]

Tantalising, isn't it?

It's going to be such an anticlimax when we find out.

It sounds too debauched to be for real.

Although, come to think of it, Camilla's debauchery enough for me.

[thedivinegoat.livejournal.com]

Was he caught having sex with a male aide? Because I could totally understand that. And in some weird way, it'd explain Camilla.

Is he really Gonzo the Muppet? 'Cause that would really explain Camilla.

You know, I'm forty weeks pregnant, I really shouldn't be laughing that hard.

From what I understand it's just that he swings both ways, which after all the media hype is spectacularly disappointing. I think I'm going with your scenario - much more entertaining. ;-)

[nute.livejournal.com]

See, this is why the British are good to keep around. So the guy who's not yet the figurehead puppet ruler, but next in line for said paper throne, may or may not have a secret that could possibly but not definitely be that he may or may not have had some sort of relations, possibly sexual but not conclusively, with an alleged male who could possibly be an unconfirmed employee of the palace that doesn't actually DO anything.

And this is a top news story.

(Note: Charles isn't a puppet ruler in the sense that someone's controlling him, he's a puppet in that he looks like Jim Henson designed him, and he's always got a hand up his backside.)

~M.

[dorable.livejournal.com]

Hee!

[tree220.livejournal.com]

from what I understand from the reports I'm reading, it has something to do with him, a male aide and a tape of the incident that Diana gave to the butler that just wrote the tell all book.

[norabombay.livejournal.com]

Personally, I'm not sure I care. So long as it doesn't involve either squid or Margaret Thatcher.

Anything else is just, well, sad.

[tomc.livejournal.com]

He was (allegedly) caught in bed with his (male) valet by a servant bringing his breakfast.
The same valet (is alleged to have) raped a male servant.
Also, rumours have surfaced that he routinely received handjobs from male members of his entourage.
This was all supposed to have happened some time ago - so it's hardly relevant to anything. I can only assume they're using it as a distraction to cover up the takeover of the world by lizards from space.

[myniamh.livejournal.com]

He was (allegedly) caught in bed with his (male) valet by a servant bringing his breakfast.
The same valet (is alleged to have) raped a male servant.

All the allegations come from the same guy, the male servant/alleged victim. Also this story has been floating around for a few years till they ran out of things to write about Harry.
=P

If you really want to know you should ask someone Italian, there is no legal restriction on this story there.

[feath.livejournal.com]

What ARE you talking about?

The papers are very spicificly clear: There is no incedent. Charles was not involved in any incdent that did not happen. There are reports of an incedent, but they are not incedents that have happened with charles, because of course, there is no incedent with charles. Charles did not do anything, because there was nothing done.

[coyotegoth.livejournal.com]

My friends list would be so much more boring without you on it :))

Oh dear God

[hippiechiq.livejournal.com]

I really need to get internet access at home, or I'm gonna burst something trying not to crack up in the library...

[ardath_rekha]

Actually, he was caught in bed with Alfred E. Neumann. Who, it turns out, is his twin.

Charles in gay s&m sex incedent Rumor

[(Anonymous)]

what happened was the Charles tied up one of his servants made if ware a gimp mask and and proceeded to have anle penatrative sex with his aid . There is also evedance for the use of a 12" rubber dildo in the act and the prencence of farm yard animals. Sourses Close to Charles say he his love of the county was a bit bestial and he was in to necrofila and drag.